The Story of My Life so Far - Part 79 - Adoption Process in Brest

in story •  24 days ago

This is the story of my life so far: 68 years and counting.
Prequel: A Brief History of my Family in France



The story starts here
Previous episode: Part 78


[After two months of travel, I am continuing this series, and I will try to do it more regularly]

Adoption Process in Brest

In France, at least at this time, to adopt foreign children, it was done in several steps.

First, once you found the children to adopt, you get the authorization from the Direction départementale des affaires sanitaires et sociales (DDASS) to have them live at your home.
Then, the DDASS sends social workers to check that all the conditions are met for the children to be adopted: do you seem like potential good parents? Is the home adequate and safe? etc... This can last for several months.
Finally, when the social workers give a positive report, a family judge will pronounce an adoption judgment.

There are two kinds of adoption in France:

  • simple adoption when the link between the children and the birth parents still exists.

  • plenary adoption which terminates the relationship between the birth parents and the children.

We had applied for plenary adoption.

I am not sure if the social workers of the DDASS were overworked, or if they had a problem with the fact that I was sometimes away from home for a week, but the process took way too long.

One social worker came several times in our apartment and asked some strange questions to our daughters, such as:

  • What do you feel when your father is away for a week when he is at sea?

This is really a strange question for children that have spent more than a year in an orphanage, after having been abandoned by their parents. A week, for them, was not a long period, as long as one of us was at home with them.

The end result was that the process was not finished before we left Brest. We had to start again during my next posting in the Parisian region.

Continue to Part 80.


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Summary
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8
Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - Part 16
Part 17 - Part 18 - Part 19 - Part 20 - Part 21 - Part 22 - Part 23 - Part 24
Part 25 - Part 26 - Part 27 - Part 28 - Part 29 - Part 30 - Part 31 - Part 32
Part 33 - Part 34 - Part 35 - Part 36 - Part 37 - Part 38 - Part 39 - Part 40
Part 41 - Part 42 - Part 43 - Part 44 - Part 45 - Part 46 - Part 47 - Part 48
Part 49 - Part 50 - Part 51 - Part 52 - Part 53 - Part 54 - Part 55 - Part 56
Part 57 - Part 58 - Part 59 - Part 60 - Part 61 - Part 62 - Part 63 - Part 64
Part 65 - Part 66 - Part 67 - Part 68 - Part 69 - Part 70 - Part 71 - Part 72
Part 73 - Part 74 - Part 75 - Part 76 - Part 77 - Part 78



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So glad to see this series continuing. I'm sure you still have so many stories to tell from your trip as well. I have never been involved in the adoption process but always hear stories about how time consuming and difficult the process can be. In the end, people are trying to provide a home for children they have come to care about and want to give them something better than they had. Unfortunately, three must be people that have created a need for such detailed and intensive vetting.

Je dois dire que je vous suis depuis quelque temps déjà Monsieur et que vous faites un travail remarquable. Tracer par écrit 68 ans de vie c'est vraiment courageux de votre part et très instructif pour nous les lecteurs. Continuez sur cette lancée

Content que la saga reprenne :-)

I have witnessed the adoption process here in Denmark both about 1980 and 25 years later, and it has changed a lot. My impression is that the demand in Europe has been heightened, and that countries with much less restrictions (especially U.S.A.) are able to pay themselves out of the problem. This has created a monetary aspect, a supply and demand aspect, of the adoption process that feels quite wrong. The behavior of Madonna and other U.S. celebrities has given the whole thing an image it shouldn't have.

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Yes, I agree.

I used to joke that I had "bought" my children, but it seems that it is often no longer a joke.

I really do love the fact that this story is very concise. When I do have the time I will go through previous episodes. Nice work.

this is very good story

When his father goes away for a week, two weeks to even a month is a very long time for a child who is always close to parents, and once in a while this problem is very fatal for those who do not leave parents, I once found a child who is sick from being left behind by his father, and this is indeed a very bitter thing for the child. but will be very different from children who are always away with parents, even sometimes they will also be happy because there is no prohibition whatsoever.