Sometimes, All You Need to Do is Say No!!
I think the title of my post says it all, but if you do follow me, you know I don't do succinct. Nah, that's just not me. I am verbose and soft haha. Sorry, that came out unintentionally. Actually, every night before dozing off, my son tells me how much he loves me because I am soft and also reminds me of his mission to make me slim haha so I was thinking of that and unintentionally that came out, but I am in no mood of changing it because I am liking the way it is flowing. Okay, so back to the topic.
I have been through many tough times in life. Before I became an adult, a lot of the hardships I faced were because of the wrong decisions taken by my parents, business, personal and otherwise. However, when I became an adult and did start living a life on my own slowly, I became more accountable for my actions. I did make some wrong decisions in life and one important lesson that I learned, the hard way though, but I did learn it, was that sometimes in life, all you need to do to escape a problem is to just say a NO.
I have been a victim of the people pleasing dilemma and for a long time had this need of being liked and approved by all. This made me take on so many tasks and responsibilities at the same time that I was exhausting myself to the core. Just because I did not want to disappoint some people, I kept doing their stuff on behalf of them and kept making things easier for them and harder for me. Fortunately, I did realize my mistake and understood that the only reason I was miserable because I was letting myself be miserable. It wasn't my duty to make sure life is perfect for everyone and if I just dare say a No to those people, I would make it easier for me. So finally I did muster up the courage to say no to those people and while the after-effects weren't as nice in the start, things did become better.
I also realized that I wasn't really doing a favor to those people by taking on their obligations. I was basically letting them slack and fall prey to their doubts and negative thoughts. So when I firmly and clearly told them they could no longer fall on me as if I was there bean bag, they too started to become more responsible. So my NO not only helped me, but turned out to be a blessing in disguise for them too.
Now, I have made this pact with myself that I won't in any case take on all the responsibilities of others and burden myself. Yes, I am still helpful but I am nobody's couch.
What are your thoughts on the topic? I have been absent from steemit for over a week so I am feeling a bit weird today. Show me some support so I don't feel alienated already. Missed you all especially my friends from @ecotrain, @steemitbloggers, @ecotrain and @thesteemengine.
Love and light,
Here are some of my articles that may interest you:
@ecotrain qotw- What is patriarchy? Is a patriarchy the same as a society led by men, or is it more, a society led by fear and a feeling of scarcity, that happens to be an environment in which the masculine takes charge?
I am a part of the wonderful @ecotrain that aims to make this world a better place so do join it if that's your aim too..