FUNNY!! - Twas the Night Before Crypto

jorlauski (58)in #story • 6 years ago (edited)

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the exchanges

Every crypto was trading well above normal ranges
The wallets were hung by the chimny with care
In hopes that some Crypto soon would be there

The mining rigs buzzed and whirred and flashed red
While visions of bitcoins danced in my head
With upgraded boards and new power supplies
I fell asleep dreaming of coin price on the rise

When out by my rig there arose such a clatter,
I jumped up from my desk to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew half asleep
Tore open the shutters to have me a peep

The moon was so bright it was easy to see
what had just come down and crashed into my tree
When, what to my wondering eyes see aflicker
But a miniature Prius, with a big Geek Squad sticker

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his cryptos they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, BITCOIN! now, ETHER! now, RIPPLE and DASH!
On, LITECOIN! on NEO! on, STEEM and Z-CASH!
To the top of the market! to the start of the fall!
Now mine away! mine away! mine away all!"

And then, in a twinkling, I heard by my rig
cursing and muttering while taking a swig
I turned around quick not quite sure what to do
It was St. Nicholas tinkering with my new GPU.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of circuit boards had flung on his back,
And he looked like a hacker just opening his pack.

The soldering iron he held tight in his hand
And the smoke it encircled his head like a band;
with sparks and clicks and just a bit of magic
he turned my rig into some new kind of gadget

He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And pointed to my computer quite proud of himself

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
My screen lit up with newly mined crypto bread;
He spoke not a word, but finished his work,
And filled all the wallets; then turned with a jerk,

And after leaving his thumbdrive in it's new port
Up the chimney he rose; with a blast and a snort
He sprang to his Prius, and to Geek Squad gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like a heat seeking missile.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,