Day 131: 5 Minute Freewrite: Tuesday - Prompt: solitude - Broken Part 6 of Lola's story
The bright lights startled Lola out of a deep sleep, and she cursed under her breath.
She reached for her face to rub the sleep out of her eyes, but was met with pained resistance. Her right inner arm was taped, holding an IV in place. She had been hospitilized. She struggled for a coherent thought, but her last solid memory wouldn't come.
She glanced around the room, and saw Tommy sitting across the room playing on his IPod. She closed her eyes hoping he hadn't noticed her. She craved solitude.
"Hey," her brother's soft voice startled her from beside her bed.
She opened her eyes and smiled slightly as he dragged a chair closer to the bedside, scrapping the linoleum.
"How are you feeling?" He asked.
Lola groaned in response.
"Man, I'm supposed to tell them when you wake up, but they are really freaking out. They keep talking about mental medications you can take that won't hurt the baby."
"I don't want medications..." she mumbled.
"Well, you have to start eating. I mean, more than a bowl a soup a day."
She rolled her eyes.
"You can listen to me or not, but I'm not the one lying in a hospital bed."
Heat rose in her chest.
Her throat was dry, and it hurt to speak, but she raised herself onto one shakey elbow, and stared deeply into her thirteen year old brother's eyes.
"You have no idea what you are talking about, Tom, no idea." Her voice came out raspy and thin.
"No? Well, tell me if I'm wrong. Two weeks ago, today, you were driving and Kyle was riding shot-gun. You slid on some ice and rolled. You walked away, but Kyle didn't. You can't really believe that you are the only one that gets it. You can't really believe that you are the only one that's sad. Lola, he was the only brother I ever had."
He dragged he's chair back against the wall, sat down hard, and put back in his earbuds.
Thanks so much for reading! And here was another I couldn't stop at five minutes! If you would like to read more for a fuller picture, I've inlcuded the other parts!
To learn more about the 5 minute freewrites visit @mariannewest!
Ahhhh I see! Loving it - thank you for giving the link.
You're welcome! Thank you for reading it!!
Thirteen-year-old brother has lots of smarts. He doesn't want to see his sister hurting...
Sometimes kids see things a lot more clearly. Thanks for reading and commenting!
So good! I just love it!
I'm so glad you like it! I'm at this point now, that when I finish, I wonder what your comment will be haha, so you can't stop now! No pressure!
sad but so true that the living has to learn to live again but sometimes sooner than they want to.
Yes, everything stays in motion even while you grieve.
Nice work. It's sometimes hard to consider the pain of others when we hurt so much ourselves.
It's your friendly free write encourager here with today's prompt: https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-132-5-minute-freewrite-wednesday-prompt-gardening
Thanks @deirdyweirdy for the comment and the prompt! Have you written the freewrite prompt yet today?
Hahaha, well said. No, I haven't. I've been too busy reading all yesterday's posts........well that's my excuse anyway.
Haha hope you didn't feel pressured!
not atall, I love doing it.
Ahh! So brutal and honest this short piece is. Like the brother's speech. And wonderfully written, the story deftly told in a few quick strokes.
Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked the speech, it was fun to write and think of how an impatient little brother might sound. If you get a sec, please read the other parts..I'd love more feedback!
Omi goodness, I never saw your response here, or I would have gone back and read these sooner! So glad I'm catching up now :)
oh... those last lines... heart break!!!!! nice writing! Loved how you really captured the essence of sorrow and frustration and despair
@tipu send tip please :)
Thank you!! This was one of my favorite parts, I really like Tommy.
Thank you!! This was one
Of my favorite parts, I
Really like Tommy.
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