'The Shattered Bride' finale, Chapter 9.4 from the Irish fantasy novel: We Come Back: Vol. 1
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The Shattered Bride
As he approached the office,
he could see through the crack in the doorway the broken window, and braced himself for another wave of sadness, before entering the room. Scanning the room, he saw the letters sitting on Jack’s desk. He sat down in his chair, and opened the note entitled Hoss.
He started with the first piece of paper,
and read the words out loud.
“Hoss, I know you won’t understand entirely the reason behind my rash actions, but know that my only explanation is love. I cannot beg you enough, to embrace your love for Joyce, and do not let it go…” as he read it, tears fell on to the letter, “It doesn’t come around every day. I proposed to Astraea, Hoss, before I ate dinner. I believe we might have led an amazing life full of love and compassion, had things turned out differently. In this letter, I am leaving my will, and I have made you the sole heir until Christian and Iris come of age, at which point it will revert to Christian, and leave Iris a substantial living. Please watch over them Hoss, do not let either of them marry for any reason other than love. I know they will be hit hard by this news, maybe even harder than you, so grieve together, and remember you are family. I am not really gone, so long as you all remember that I am in a place free from pain and sorrow. Allow yourself, and help them, to carry on living, not just surviving, but really living, do it for me, please. I love you my brother. Do not rest in sorrow, but rejoice in knowing our friendship does not end here, and we will see each other again someday. Your brother, Jack,” his voice cracked and he collapsed his arms on to the desk and mourned for the loss of his dearest friend.
Meanwhile, downstairs,
Mason, Beathan, Lilly and Mary were all comforting each other. The entire household was in mourning, and Fareus, though distraught, remained professional, in trying to keep the house running. He flowed warm beverages and comfort food items in and out of the kitchen, and tried to attend to everyone as best he could. Joyce had noticed Hoss hadn’t come down yet, and when she saw no one was paying attention, she slipped out and up the stairs to find him. As she walked down the hall, she heard soft sobbing at the one end.
Seeing Hoss crying at Jack’s desk,
caused her to cry as well. She crossed the room to him, and wrapped her arms around him. He turned and sat her on his lap, both holding each other through their pain.
I woke in my room suddenly, in a terrible sweat, my face wet from crying.
I lied still in the darkness,
recalling the nightmare that had woken me. I had dreamed that Jack had killed himself. I cried as I pulled the blankets closer to my face. I was grateful it was just a nightmare. It seemed so real though, every detail, every sense, every moment, so raw in my memory, that it was a nightmare truly convincing of devastation. I could smell him even then, as I could in the nightmare. As I fixed the blankets around me, I realized that there was a sheet as a top layer. I sat up confused. Why was there a sheet on top of my comforter?
I felt my heart pounding in my throat
as I touched the JS monogram embroidered on the sheet. A waft of Jack rose into the air, filling my nostrils, as I moved it between my fingers. It wasn’t a nightmare… he was gone, he was actually dead. I started to hyperventilate as I began to cry all over again, burying my face in his sheet. I cried until I felt I could cry no more, which lasted most of the night. When I felt I was so exhausted I could not cry any further, I opened my balcony doors, and sat with his sheet wrapped around me, on my love seat under the moonlight.
Aubrey had told Trix what happened when he crawled into bed late that evening.
Though Trix had tried to sleep,
she felt so badly for Raea, and worried about her so greatly, that she seemed to lie awake all night. She finally decided to climb out of bed for a glass of water, and found herself, taking her water down the hall to my room. She leaned against the door and listened for the sounds of sleep, but heard none.
She heard my footsteps,
and the opening of the terrace doors. She gently knocked on the bedroom door.
I whipped my head around, swearing I’d heard a knock on the door, but who would be up this late? I gently climbed out of the loveseat, and keeping the sheet draped around me, walked to the door and opened it. I was surprised and oh so relieved to see Trix standing there in her nightgown; I thought I had imagined the knocking.
When we both had glasses of water, we sat down opposite each other on the terrace. We stayed sitting quietly for some time before either of us spoke. Trix was the first to do so.
“I… I don’t know what to say. I cannot possibly fully express in words how sorry I am for your loss Raea. Did he do it… in some way, for you?”
“Yes, I imagine he did, or at least that is what he intended.”
“Surely…”
“He promised,”
suddenly my voice rose over the balcony.
“I tried to make him promise me that he wouldn’t do this, he wouldn’t rip us apart! I trusted him with Jon and Aubrey, I trusted that they would not overstep their mark, but they did. He is dead, Trix. Can you not see how wicked that is? He could be anywhere now, any realm out of the millions that are out there! I could have survived one hundred years on Earth without him, but an eternity? Is this what he thought love was, to leave me forever without him? I can’t…” I began crying uncontrollably all over again.
Trix quickly sat next to me, and held me,
rocking me back and forth in her arms, letting me cry, and crying with me.
The entire household had woken to my pain.
It seemed even the walls creaked in angst. My father stepped out on to his terrace, and breathed in the cool night air. He didn’t know what he could do, but he knew he had to do something. It wasn’t just his daughter’s heartbreak, everything about the death of Jack Staun, felt wrong. As if some sacred rule had been broken. He had failed, somehow he had been blind. He rested his arms on the sill, feeling out of breath. The warm soft touch of his wife’s hands on the back of his neck brought immediate relief to his troubled mind. He turned and hugged her.
“You must go tomorrow to the other Keepers.”
“How…”
“I am far more observant and aware than this household seems to think.”
“What can the Keepers do, that will fix a mistake of this proportion?”
“They cannot fix it for you my dear, but they can tell you how. Come back to bed. Tomorrow, you and Aubrey will go together to the Distant Shores.”
“And Astraea, what will she do? She cannot…”
“I am here for her, and so is Trix. Come.”
He sighed and gave one last glance at the night sky, before following his wife to bed.
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