The 'Naked Posts' Series: The Ghost of You 💔

in #poetry6 years ago

I'm stripping myself of the heartache, of the burning pain that visits me in the night.

It starts here.

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I had a dream about you last night. It tortuously tore at my heart strings, dragging up old burned memories from the ashes of the past.

As I lay my head down on the familiar, soft embrace of the pillow below,
It must have sent memories trickling through my veins of the times you used to hold my hand in between your strong palms as you pulled me closer, tighter...

Explosions fired off in my heart like sparks, jumping around in excitement.

I could see your hair, perfectly whisked back, the texture, the color, the way it reminded me of those preppy football players you see in the movies…

I remember my hands being tussled in it, entangling themselves in the strands, feeling their way to the top of your neck, on the edge of fur and skin, my fingerprints embedding themselves into the moment.

In this dream, you wouldn’t come near enough for the snowball to build. In my dream, I watched you from afar.

Like a stranger in the night shadows, I hid behind whatever would protect me from the radiance of the moonlight and I watched over you, wondering, wishing, regretting…

In this dream you were just as you are, perfectly recreated to torture my senses.

You lived in a beautiful house you had built from the fire in your strong hands… those strong hands….

It was dark but for a light in the kitchen hanging from the ceiling. You were asleep, dreaming peacefully… how I wish you would dream of me.

Beside you where I used to have a place was a new model, someone picked off the shelf fresh, someone who hadn’t battled and scorned you like I had…

Her beautiful golden hair sprawled out across the pillows and into your side, your nose sat gently above it, never minding.

I remember you used to stop moments in their tracks and smell my hair as those strong hands came up from the sides of my ears, lifting me into your grasp and urging me to your lips….

But that was then..

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My deepest feelings have floated through my fingers here...

I am passionate about writing, I love the way emotions can mold themselves into words and those words can produce images in our minds, tethering together stories of another's life. What beauty that is!

I know this is a little bit different than what I normally post, but true to form, I always enter my keyboard with an open mind, a open heart and see what happens!

I have been doing a lot of what we call self work and I've found all of these emotions and memories trapped inside the deepest areas of my body and the darkest corners of my mind.

This is my release, as I let these images turn into words and back again, I let them go like white doves into the sky, letting my heart be free of all the heart break locked inside!

Thank you for hearing my heart!
(Heartbreak comes oh-too-naturally for someone with a big heart like me!)
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We all have scars, secrets and burns within us. Let the power of passion free our hearts!

Do what you love, say what you feel and don't be afraid to be vulnerable!

My heart's in charge here. I write about what I feel in the moment. What inspires me, what drives my passion. Here are some of my recent additions:


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Hope to see you again soon!
Sending you love!

XO,
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I read your poetry and felt like it came straight out of your heart. Such a loss of a good person that somebody left. The broken heart never lies

Aww thank you @hassansteemit, I do try to put my heart in everything I do ie: heart-to-heart ;) It was a long time ago, just a little reminder in my dreams :) thanks for the kind message <3

good work is needed to be appreciated. loved your writing more than anything. pure simple and heart shattering. reminded me of someone who was once close to me. all in all it hurts and sometimes you can not do anything about it :)

Thank you, I love writing but sometimes emotions can be difficult to share ;)

I think the only way to get better is to let it out. If we keep it in, it'll always stay there!

You make me want to speak the language of love, like spanish.
His thoughts and memories with my touch i want to banish
Give a room for me to follow while i hold your hand
I crest your name on my wrist band
You don't have to have torturing dreams anymore
I am here for you to hold and i am real.

Oh @olawalium! A poem for me in return?! How sweet <3 You are the best Valentine ever!

Yaaaaay! I am glad you love it. You are the best by milesssss!!!. Thanks adorable heart.

Oh mine. This is so real and direct. Its always nice to let go and speak out what is going througj ones mind. I'm really so sorry about how you feel. But please, let go the burning pain. You have a family here. We are family and we love you. Please take heart and be the happy you.

Hi @oredebby thank you so much for your touching comment! Don't worry, I am my normal self, this was just some dust sitting down deep that I wanted to get out. It feels much better leaving it here than inside. Thank you for hearing me share here :) <3

Oh wow. M glad you feel better. Pls stay safe

I will <3 Don't worry, I am actually in a very wonderful place in my life right now, I think that's why my emotions are coming out through my dreams :)

Awwwwwwnnnn thats sweet to hear. Lol. Just be happy, thats the main thing

How odd this post came at a time when I felt oddly the same and oddly different. Thanks for sharing your heart my dearest. Just completed a Florida meet up with some friends and cannot wait until we can have our own! <3

Awww @kubbyelizabeth, I hope you are not hurting. Heart break is indefinite. This particular one for me was 9 years ago when it began... I guess then 5 to 6 years now that it's been cold turkey no longer. We never forget our first loves though. If you want to cry together, let's have a long distance date on DC <3

I am feeling what you write, I know these kind of dreams, can be hard to wake up sometimes!! Do you always remember your dreams? I do;)

Sometimes I get so lost in my dreams I don't even know if I'm awake or sleeping and when I wake up I am completely disoriented! I don't always remember my dreams. I think I can pick and choose. The really intense stuff like this, I usually try to leave in there haha but I am working on letting these stuck emotions out so I know that's where this came from! Do you write your dreams down ever?

Oh yes I know how that can be. I sometimes write my dreams down, or just tell my partner about them when I wake up. And sometimes I am in that feeling for many hours after waking up. I love to dream and I can also control them quite good. I can even decide what's going to happen next in my dreams. Not always but most of the time. Dreams are endless, and everything is possible. But sometimes also scary.❤❤❤

It's so fun, it's like Inception when we start to learn how to manipulate them :) I believe we have so much going on in the dream world and like to pay close attention when things like this come up. Come visit me in my dreams, we can cook together ;)

I would love to do that! Will see if I can manage to get there tonight 😉💃🎆🎆🎆

The life of a writer.

<3 a writer's greatest gift is experience to talk about

I have been lucky enough to have been writing and making music from a young age . However I only started song writing 10 years ago befoer then I was too scared about what others thought ...about my thoughts. Anyway I am 7 months down the line from a break up and I thought all was well but I realised I am still not over and I wrote these lines " Your a parasite in my mind , living in the warmth thats left inside . Im not saying a pest is you . Im just saying I still miss you "

Awww I absolutely love that line @stickchumpion! I used to write tons of songs when I was an angsty youth but then I gave it up almost to punish myself in some morbid teenager-like way. I tortured myself a lot.

I'm just getting back into writing and rediscovering my passion for music, it feels amazing to put the feelings into words and then release them.

As for the break up of yours, I'm sorry to hear. I believe those we love and loose stay with us forever and in a way, it's quite beautiful if we process it healthily. Writing can definitely help with that <3

Indeed Heart to heart so few things , first we should collab on some lyrics and music you write the words OII do the music . I have already achieved this with a previous post. Second we need to scehdule a voice chat in discord and third here is a post I did featuring a recent song about the break up and stuff .
https://steemit.com/music/@stickchumpion/original-song-hate-you-baby-hate-the-babies-my-entry-for-steemotion-contest-hymns-of-hatred

Well that just sounds like way too much fun and I would absolutely love to do that at some point but right now, I am in an enormous amount of things I've started and have to catch up on before I can start anything new ;) I would be so honored to collab with you soon though, just let me catch up <3

No problem so long as I can nag you every week

you are awesome!

Awww wow, thank you! That is always something wonderful to hear ;) Have a great day @nahupuku! Thanks for this :)

your welcome, well you are beautiful and creative! salut from Caracas, Venezuela, SouthAmerica ;) If you wanna check some of my posts, im bilingual writer, some poetrys and music, art, i create a list, the english posts and spanish content that i created from Steemit since day one, be my guest if you wanna check it oit, https://steemit.com/spanish/@nahupuku/original-song-selva-de-concreto-y-mi-lista-de-posts-hasta-la-fecha - I created this post 2 weeks ago, so its not an upvote stuff :p only for read if you like it, i hope to translate some other´s poetry old post in english very soon, and i have new open mic songs and a new poetry but in spanish, after this post. if you wanna check it out, well they are in my profile. Blessings <3 u.steel-my-heart ;)

Venezuela is a place I have not been yet but would love to visit :) I lived in Central America for almost 2 years and I would have loved to go more South but that trip will be another time :)

Thank you for sharing your post with me, I will go check it out <3 Have a wonderful weekend!

Venezuela its a hellchaos just right now, its hard to live here, all my friends are in others lands scaping from here, others was dead whatever... its very hard. but well we trying to smile and resist every single day. Southamerica have an amazing beautiful places, like brasil or others cool places, and countries. dont come´s here. and your welcome ;) well its not too much to do here. its very dangerous to stay in the streets so we are like prissioners in our houses like jails. :p blessing

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