Do you believe in Heaven?
Much like politics religion seems to be a very touchy subject these days. Conversations about it can be really difficult, especially with family when there are opposing ideals.
My parents are hardcore Christians and I, well I am not. When I say hardcore I mean they read bible verses to each other for an hour every morning, they do mission trips constantly, they give a lot to the church and are always praying and "thanking god" for everything. Not that I find that as a bad thing, it's just not my thing. Don't get me wrong they are wonderful people and I am incredibly lucky to have them as parents, we just don't see eye to eye on on religion anymore.
While growing up I went to church every week, I even participated in Sunday school and youth group so I have been a christian and I know what Christianity is all about. However, after serving my first tour in Iraq I had a change of heart about religion in general (but that's a whole other story in itself). To be totally honest I am not religious at all anymore. I wouldn't say I'm an atheist or agnostic either, I honestly don't know exactly what I believe and I'm fine with that, I'm just not going to pretend I know. I do believe in something bigger than all of this, I just don't know if it's a god or the universe or what. Besides, I honestly think not knowing is way more intriguing than thinking we have this shit figured out.
Anyhow, I had an interesting conversation with my father not to long ago. We were talking about religion and that's when he asked me how I planned on getting into heaven. At first I thought he was joking, but when I chuckled I saw the look in his eyes and I realized he was serious. I was honestly dumbfounded. I had made it clear to him plenty of times before that I don't believe in heaven but for some reason he couldn't seem to wrap his mind around that.
I asked him why this amazing life isn't enough? Why does there have to be more after it? Why do people constantly worry about something that may never come to be? I told him I love this life and I will worry about my next one when/if that time ever comes. He didn't like my answers, he said that would be too late.
I asked him why it was so important to him. He said that he didn't want to be in heaven without me and he was concerned that I was going to go to hell if I didn't believe what he believed. I told him I believe I have lived a good life, so if there is a heaven and if his god was just than he would let me in to heaven because he would see that I was a good person in life. He told me that wasn't good enough, I had to believe that Jesus had died for my sins and apologize for them. At this point I asked him if pedophiles, rapists and murderers could get into heaven if they believed and apologized for their sins? He said yes, if the truly mean it anyone can be forgiven for their sins as long as they believe what he believed. So you are telling me is someone who is truly evil can get into heaven for saying sorry but someone who lived a good life but wasn't christian is going to go to hell? I asked. He didn't know what to say because he saw the flaw I pointed out. I told him I personally think that is stupid and don't want to be any part of "that heaven." He didn't like that answer at all.
There are many things about religion that I have always found hard to accept. Maybe because I think differently from most people, or maybe its because I am not good at following the crowd, either way I have questioned everything since I was a child, including religion because so many things don't add up. ie: I have always found it ridiculous that an all-knowing god would only have one correct religion and then make humans choose a religion mostly based on demographics of where you were born and raised to decide if you get into heaven or not. Even as a child I remember asking my pastor what happened to all the other people who die and thought their religion was right but it wasn't? Do they go to hell too? Even if they lived good lives? Why would any God let that happen? That didn't seem right to me, even as a child. And besides, Christianity is only about 1/3 of the world religion, that means 2/3 of people would automatically go to hell? Just like that? Do not pass go, do not collect 100 dollars... I would never get answers for those questions, they just tell me that I was to young to understand. But even as a child things didn't add up to me.
Like most of you I have been told stories since I was a child that turned out not to be true. There was the Easter bunny, then the tooth fairy, and obviously Santa Clause, all of which turned out to be lies. But then we get told unbelievable stories about Jesus and God who have (magic) powers and live in the clouds (aka heaven) and we are just suppose to accept it without question throughout our lives!? Even though every other story we were told was true turned out to be a lie? That seems like the perfect set up for failure.
My father pleaded with me to reconsider my decision about religion. He said if he was wrong about his religion and I was right that the worst case scenario was there was no heaven and when he dies everything just goes black (he has no clue what I believe because he has never bothered to ask). He said worst case scenario if I was wrong and he was right that I would burn in hell forever. (I know this part comes off as rude but he was saying it because he loves me and is truly worried, he was not being rude at all) He asked if I wanted to risk that? I said I would never get scared into being in a religion and that's not something that I believe so it doesn't affect me. He said it would affect me if I was wrong.
I think that many people turn to religion to have that ace in the hole, like back up plan, a just in case it's real thing. I don't think that most of the younger generation even truly believes in religion anymore. If they do they sure don't practice those beliefs on a daily basis in public. I am not hating on religion so much as people as a whole, most people don't even practice the golden rule anymore, or even know what it is for that matter.
I asked how he even knew he had the right religion? He said he just knows. As if that should be enough for me to believe also. That made me laugh. I told him that if I were to "pick a religion" and I "wanted it to be the right one" (yes I seriously did the quotes with my fingers) shouldn't I choose to be Jewish? I mean, Jesus was a Jew. Don't you think the son of god was the right religion? If not wouldn't of Jesus gone to hell? I said sarcastically. At this point he was getting frustrated so I thought it was a good time to change the subject.
We talked about cryptos for a little bit and then I headed out. Nothing had changed, we were no farther than when the conversation was started but I felt bad, like I had let him down. I really wish I could believe what he does, that we will be together forever in the clouds in the sky. But I have lived a very different life with very different experiences than he has so believing that is just not possible for me, not matter how much I want it to be. I honestly don't know if there is a heaven or not, I don't have answers for most of lifes' questions. If he is right and there is a heaven I really hope I can meet him there somehow, but if not I'm ok with that too. As long as I don't have to pretend to believe something I truly don't believe in.
We all have our own journeys in life, don't let anyone change your identity, it's all you have. Believe whatever makes sense to you and makes you happy, because the truth is, no one knows whats next... if anything ;)
I love this! I love discussions about religion, and kudos to you for questioning and following your own heart and mind on this subject. It can be really hard when people you love feel that way. They are scared for you! One way I explain things to people that I think might be helpful for you in making peace with your dad on this topic is this: I think of religions like languages. If I meet someone who is Spanish and they point to the sky and say "cielo," if I didn't know any better, I'd say they were wrong and ignorant. It's "sky!" But in their language they use different words to talk about things. I think religion is the same. We use different stories and ideas to talk about the same truth that is bigger than our human minds can fully comprehend. And the way we know what is right for us is by listening to our hearts. In your dad's heart, he believes that if he doesn't accept Jesus he will go to hell; that is true for him. But in your heart you believe that if you are a good person that is enough. Divinity speaks directly to our hearts in a language only we can understand. It may look wrong from the outside, but so does a foreign word to our native ears.
Thanks for sharing all that =) ... I, too, grew away from Christianity... My story is different though... It happened while I was in high school. I wrote about all this a while back.. Let me know if you're interested and I'll drop a link =)
This line for me is the most important in all you said:
Exactly so! ^^ In the past, religion was all there was when it came to the big question... Questions that, at the time, we had no way of answering, really. Religion was out best attempt.
Now, though, there's little excuse for an educated person to simply believe in anything.
Hey, thanks for the great comment! Its always nice to know other people share similar ideas about these types of things.
Yeah absolutely drop a link, I would really like to read it.
This is very much a similar way of my thinking.
I believe religion was created in the first place to try to explain that something a lot of us feel and know that must exist somewhere. They called that being God and everyone had their own interpretation for that. The writing of the Bible was nothing but a natural way of expressing someone's beliefs. And the same happens with most religions.
They are mostly based upon "good" morals and also ancient traditions that might not seem relevant nowadays. However, back in the day, religion played an amazing role in controlling masses so society had a path to follow.
It's for that reason that I am not like most of atheists who hate religion. It did what it had to do, but now it's probably a little unecessary with all the knowledge there is.
Great post!
I don't hate religion either, I think some people really need it in their lives so I'm glad they have it. I just don't like how everyone is constantly trying to push their religion on me. I never ask people to change what they believe, but when I tell them I'm not religious they feel the need to "save me"? Other than that, I have no issues with religion.
Glad you liked the post ;)
I have learned trying not to care much when I am pushed over it. They find themselves in a Paradox. They believe salvation is obtained when convincing others to join them. If they don't, they would go to hell too for not trying.
But it is true they should respect our decisions and not get too annoying along the way.
I've studied philosophy so I've done some thinking on issues like these. There are many religions out there and objectively there is little to assert that one is more correct than the other, as proof is generally lacking.
I personally hold a worldview that I like to call positive nihilism. There is no intrinsic value or morals in the world, and all is more or less meaningless (especially in the grand scheme of things). However, instead of experiencing this negatively, I experience it positively and life-affirming. If all there is, is the here and now and there is no point to it all, everything becomes rather simple: Just make the best of it, try to enjoy yourself, and be kind to others.
And when you think about it, if you just adhere to that simple thought, you'll find that you are leading pretty much the life that all major religions propagate. The rest are details. And instead of adhering to these ethics out of a selfish desire to ascend to heaven, you'll be doing it out of the morally right reasons instead.
If there is any question on whether or not a heaven exists, or a judgemental diety, I have no issues whatsoever facing it and standing for myself. I am of the belief that if an almighty and morally guided diety exists, then this diety will not look down on anyone that could be called 'good' person. In the end, if such a diety is at all to be taken seriously as a moral compass then it is to be assumed it is not a smallminded and spiteful diety.
Wow, you really nailed it on all this comment.. I would reply back but everything you said is so true and mostly what I believe too.. You should really write an article on this topic! ;)
I am religious.
In my perspective heaven and hell is a state. Its not a place.
Heaven is a yes to God and simply doing good in this life, a test.
Earth is not perfect, it is beautiful but riddled with sin and pain, hardship.
Because many people do not want to do good.
That is exactly why heaven, is another place where these hardships don't exist.
Hell is a state of being without God anyway, freewill is a gift that people must be careful of. It's a state of choosing evil over good.
Jesus was jewish but he changed many things, that's why he taught new ways.
Then again, nobody should force you. You are the pilot of your own life.
It would be a lie to be in a religion and not accept it fully, or believe.
I appreciate your reflections and openness.
If you do believe in God, and religion is undefined then communicate with God, he knows your thoughts and what good you have done.
He is always with you.
♥️✨👌
Sorry I didn't see your comment until now.. I really like your explanation and I like your approach of being mindful of everyone. I wish more people shared your values. Thanks for the great comment. Take care.
This isn't an easy subject you write about here, especially when you enter familiy beliefs into the whole thing.
I had a similar upbringing and choose to have my own relationship with a higher power. I don't practice religion anymore.
I do think it's more about what we do not how we feel. I can't imagine a creator that's concerned too much about how we feel, but what we do to help his other creations. How we decide to live among each other. :)
Yeah, it was incredibly hard to write because I didn't want to upset anyone because of their beliefs but I wanted people to know its ok if you believe differently than others.
You nailed it on this part:
"So you are telling me is someone who is truly evil can get into heaven for saying sorry but someone who lived a good life but wasn't christian is going to go to hell?"
I've had many, similar conversations with my mother, ever since she converted to a rather intense Christian church. I grew up Catholic, and fell away from it over the years (as did she). Now she tells me she worries about me and my kids (but interestingly, not my husband - LOL) on a daily basis, that we're not getting into heaven with her, because we weren't baptized "the right way" (and in fact, my kids haven't been baptized at all). It truly hurts my brain, and my heart.
And you are absolutely right - we all have our own journeys. Bright blessings to you on yours.
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Thank you so much! This post was very difficult to write without offending people (unintentionally), I am so happy that you enjoyed it enough to put it in The daily whistle stop! :)
I do wish you well in finding some peace with your father on this subject, as it is a touchy thing, no doubt. It is difficult when folks try to force their beliefs on others. If you ever do find common ground on this subject with your father, PLEASE let us know! Many kudos to you for walking your own path, though, and thank you for sharing this with #steemitbloggers 😊
Thank you for your kinds words. It really is a difficult situation so for now I have resorted to just agreeing to disagree and dropping the subject. I do plan on continuing the talk one day but I have to wait until the timing is right. Thanks for dropping by, I am glad you enjoyed my post.