Filipino Jokes Translated for Western Tastes Part 16
Hello, my fun-loving Steem friends! This is the 16th part of my series post about Filipino jokes which I have translated for Western audiences. Please check out Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, and 15. Please read and pick the one you like the most. Tell me in the comments section on why you liked it.
There are still a lot more funny jokes that need translating. These jokes are the products of the Filipinos' creativity, ingenuity, and love of social drinking.
So please read and enjoy!
Magic plant
One day John saw Peter plant something on the ground but he wasn't holding anything. Curious, John approached Peter and asked.
JOHN: Peter, what the hell are you planting? There's nothing there. You are not holding anything!
PETER: Bro, this fruit plant is SEEDLESS!
Swim fast
There was a world contest held in Australia about who can swim across a dangerous river fully infested with man-eating crocodiles and make it alive. Many contestants, each from a different country, were there for the 10 million dollar prize.
MR. AMERICA went first in the river but the crocodiles instantly ate him. The audience cried then clapped!
MR. INDIA jumped into the river and almost swam halfway. The crocodiles reached him and tore him up quickly. The audience screamed and cheered!
Finally, MR. PHILIPPINES dived suddenly into the water and torpedoed his way across the other side of the river. He emerged shouting wildly at the other side of the river bank. The audience roared with approval and he won!
When interviewed on how he did it, MR. PHILIPPINES had this to say:
"I want to find the guy who maliciously pushed me into the river and kill him!!!"
Crazy escape
Two crazy mental patients wanted to escape the mental institution they were confined in...
CRAZY ONE: Friend, I know of a way to escape this looney bin we are in.
CRAZY TWO: How? The gate is always being padlocked!
CRAZY ONE: Yes, that is why we are going to destroy that padlock!
CRAZY TWO: You are right! Let's go!
First achievements
RUSSIAN: We were the first country to reach space.
AMERICAN: We were the first to land in the moon.
FILIPINO: We will be the first to reach the sun!
RUSSIAN AND AMERICAN: That is madness! No one can land in the sun...It is too hot!
FILIPINO: Of course, it is simple. We will land there at night!
Attempted rape
Meanwhile at a police station...
LADY: Mr. Officer, I'd like to file a case against my neighbor, Tony the Handsome.
POLICEMAN: And what are the charges, ma'am?
LADY: It is attempted rape.
POLICEMAN: Maybe you can work out a pretrial settlement with him as the rape did not happen so you can get payment for your trouble?
LADY: That's why I am filing the case as the rape did not happen!
Translated from Source: http://www.jokespinoy.com/
Follow me as @darthnava: "I find your lack of faith in Steem quite irritating."
Nice joker and joks... thanks for photo....