Are We Asking For It?
This is a response to a comment on my article here on sexual clickbait.
Are we asking for it?
@cogliostro has a strange answer to that question.
Ladies, in the wild, in lawless conditions with no police - you need to cover up, because otherwise you will get raped all the time by horny men.
Covering up helps a decent woman only get raped some of the time, not constantly and not by everyone. It helps her gain favor with the other females, who are less likely to see her as a "slut" and unfair competition. The decent men of the tribe are inspired by this, and often are willing to give their lives to protect the decent women from all dangers, all rapists, domestic and international.
In his opinion women wear clothes in order to protect themselves from the ever so daunting and oppressive nature of males. He claims that if we didn’t, we’d ”get raped all the time.” This is both shocking and curious.
When I asked myself the above question, “why do we wear clothes?” I came up with several very different answers. Perhaps I’m too cold or too hot, want to cover up, or shield myself from mosquitos.
He has a pretty strange ideology, but I continued to read anyway.
That is the origin of our "oppressive" custom to dress modestly, and not spread your legs for the public in wantonly, tawdry self-glorification.
Here is where it starts to become a rollercoaster...
Restricting Women’s Freedom
Does it restrict women's freedom to bar them from such cheap thrills? Sure. But so what?
Telling women what and what not to wear is restrictive, but it isn’t to bar them from cheap thrills-- it bars us from expressing ourselves.
In my opinion, women should be able to wear whatever they want. Hell, they could be naked for all I care (as long as it’s abiding local laws or they’re indoors). Regardless, it does not excuse rape, and the perpetrator should be held accountable for their actions.
“One of the basic tenants of the United States Constitution is freedom of expression. If a woman makes a choice to wear a short skirt or go bra-less she had the God given and Constitutional right to do without harassment or fear of bodily harm.” (debate.org)
Where it gets scary
Police restricts men's freedom too. Common decency restricts men's freedom even further, as far as their interaction with women.
As you pretend not to know (but I know you know), men have a biological reflex, they get a hard dick from seeing your wondrous feminine charms and men always want to fuck - often when you don't.
This is terrifying.
I’m familiar with biological urges. I have them, as well. But I also have self control.
Surely, this isn’t a valid excuse for modern misbehavior.
Do men really feel this way?
If you want men to magically be "OK" with it, to ignore everything they were evolved to do and be, then you will end up destroying men and you will be left utterly miserable on your own with other miserable women. You can't push and push indefinitely, dangling sex in front of men's faces like a scarlet cloth in front of a raging bull, without experiencing a pushback that will send you flying, and land you right on your naive ass in the middle of ridiculously unfavorable circumstances you never bargained for or deserved.
His last sentence is possibly the only one that is remotely agreeable to me.
“Ridiculously unfavorable circumstances you never bargained for or deserved” is damn right. Being harassed or raped is never deserved.
The rest of it is absolutely toxic, though.
We hope you go back to being your sweet, unpretentious and modest selves very soon, inspiring us to see you as the treasured and cherished mother of our future unborn children... not as a fuck doll to be used by every Jack and Joe. And that you discard this silly blue hair diversion you misguidedly call "empowerment" forever.
The Good Men.
This is one of the things that motivates me as an activist. Some people still think that it’s okay to blame the victim, or that it’s okay to control and manipulate people to fit their standards.
His entire letter is an apologist perspective on rape.
I’m trying very hard to be objective, but it is nearly impossible with this one. I disagree with this because it denies women basic rights and freedoms.
Empowerment is different for everyone, and sure, sometimes it’s defined by what we wear. But that is never an excuse to mistreat or tell anyone what to do.
A “good man” is respectful.
Stop telling women what to wear, and stop telling women how to not get raped.
Thanks for reading. Question and discuss.