The @ecotrain's Question of the Week Tie-up Post: Are women who dress provocatively responsible for unwanted attention, or should men learn to control themselves?
This week the @ecotrain ride through the thick of the jungle and tackle an emotive and very important subject. At its worst this theme includes sexual abuse and rape, and demonstrate some of the most atrocious abuse of masculine power. Our world is still a male-centric place nearly everywhere, but today we are starting to finally look at this because the patriarchy way is causing devastation and destruction due to a gross imbalance. This QOTW was especially tricky because we are a global community writing for a global audience! This question does mean different things to different people, but the theme is the same... if in different ways. Although we do have quite a range of opinions on this question, there is one thing we all agree on. That is that it is never OK to touch, grope or otherwise cause distress to someone! The meaning of unwanted attention in this question of the week assumes none physical attention such as verbal or other interaction.
With that said, thank you for all who took part. I know it wasnt easy for some of you to write on this question and so I thank you for diving deep and sharing your views and personal stories with us They help us all to understand you and the world a bit better. I also learn about how things are in other cultures through this process as we all come from so many places!
If you are reading this and would also like to write on this question please do, and use the ecotrain tag so I can spot it. I usually support good posts with the Community Support Iniative to help encourage you to write great posts!
THIS WEEKS PHOTO PILE
THIS WEEKS POSTS ON THE QUESTION
Are women who dress provocatively responsible for unwanted attention, or should men learn to control themselves?
@zen-art
I am sick and tired of men who act like victims. They always brought it on to themselves. With every tight t-shirt, they brought it to themselves. With every pair of short pants, they brought it to themselves. Why do they go to the gym and work on their muscles if they do not want to be touched? Why do they comb their hair and grow their beards if they do not want to be used as meat that they are? Filthy meat. They like to be beaten afterward. They enjoy it. They deserve it. There is always something they need to be punished for. After all, science has proven that women are more intelligent. Men are on this planet only for procreation and physical labor. They are nothing more than property. Their brains are just too small to do anything else. Women need to control men for their own good. They would be lost without us. Silly little stupid creatures, they do not even realize how useless their existence is...
@mountainjewel
First let me just say that as a woman immediately this issue pisses me off. We still live in a world where a woman who is raped is asked what she was wearing. We live in a world that automatically answers this question with placing the violation of women's bodies on women and not on the men who are doing the violating. If this doesn't raise my ire... Well, let's fan the flames. As a woman I am beyond tired of this line of thinking... so let me reveal to you how it looks from my perspective.
@celestialcow
As an ecotrain passenger, each week there is a new thought provoking question to try and answer. This week is... If there is a GOD then why do bad things happen? This was such a big question, I could not even begin to sit and start typing it on my mobile phone (as that's all I'm travelling with to do my posting) so I thought I would instead just talk, I'm sorry it's 18 minutes long... I was expecting to sum it up in about half the time but in reality I could of kept talking for hours. I had some technical difficulties uploading to dtube so I'm using utube instead. This is just my opinion from experience, our opinions on this all differ and I open to comments, ideas, suggestion, dialogue.
WATCH ON YOUTUBE
@hopehuggs
Last year, or any year before that I would have had a different answer to what I have now, but I don’t think it will be a popular one… So, up to about a year ago, I would have been up in arms on this question and said, yes, of course, men should not act like that and a woman should be allowed to wear whatever she likes, without the fear of unwanted attention. But you can’t go changing people, just like that, you can say ‘its wrong’ to the cows come home, but it won’t make a blind bit of difference. God only knows I tried ‘changing’ someone for 13 years, it just doesn’t work. It wasn't even a major change, just I could see potential and I tried to motivate them to see that potential too, but no cigar.
@eco-alex
Oh Men! I am one, and I know what it means to be a man and have all the feelings and attributes that men have. I have desires, fantasies, and will often look at any beautiful woman (or man for that matter) with appreciation or admiration.. and yes sometimes even lust! Even though I am a man, not all men are the same, and some are more driven by their hormones desires and instincts than others. Personally speaking I have experienced being relatively unaffected by a beautiful woman for most of my young adulthood, as well as the primal feelings and urges of a more mature man. Having experienced both sides of the fence, it puts me me in a good place to share a little about this very important question!
@solarsupermama
Well, now. This is a fun one. I figure anyone who has ever had a look at my page probably knows how I feel about this, but I'm gonna tell you anyway. Honestly, how is this even a question still?! This is a multi layered question, and I want to talk about several different aspects. First of all!!! If you could see me now, you would see my finger up in the air. Let's get at the real root here. At the very core of this is the totally mistaken idea that anyone other than you is responsible for your behavior - or even your feelings. No one makes you do anything. No one makes you angry or sad or anything. We are always at choice. Yes, other people's actions and words affect us, but we are responsible for us. Personal responsibility. It's what's for breakfast.
@trucklife-family
Ah This question, upon reading it for the first time I became annoyed, frustrated and defensive. So many thoughts were running through my head. It is such a huge controversial question. How do I even begin to answer it! The amount of pressure put on both women and men today to look and act a certain way is huge, especially in western society. Both the media and the fashion industry have a lot of control over how some people choose to dress. Within the music industry today, especially within pop culture it is very normal to see artists wear provocative clothing. It is more about how you look that the actual talent you have. Pop stars are mostly manufactured, so that they can bring in a lot of money for the music industry. Those artists are also seen as role models for some. How many people would like to have the life of a music Star, to be rich and successful. This is what being rich and successful is being portrayed as, getting where you are by how you look. This is the message being put out there.
@riverflows
There are three words that stand out for me in @ecotrain's polarising question of the week - 'provocative' 'responsible' and 'control'.
Firstly, I unequivocally will argue that everyone is responsible for controlling their desires, knowing the impact that it may have on them and the world. Human beings have the power of free will and it is no excuse to say that 'that's how men are wired'. Sure, that maybe true - yet since when did we allow genetics to rule human behaviour? We could argue the same is true for paedophiles - would you argue that children are asking for it? This may be an extreme analogy, but the point I'm trying to make is that we all have self-control, and to not exercise that whilst knowing your actions are wrong is immoral. I never subscribe to that 'I just couldn't help myself' line, whether it comes to affairs or rape - it's still base and ugly.
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Jungle thick indeed!! Yes this was one for the books! Thankful to be wading into these paradigms and bringing light through our words with each of you 💚😘
We sure did not hold back on this one, good job everyone! 💚
Human males are visually stimulated and that is a given fact so women must not wear things that will entice Males because not all Males for that matter have the same morality.
I am very satisfied with the results, these users did a great job
What an amazing discussion you created and fostered @eco-alex! It continues still in the comment threads. :) Feeling grateful for my experiences in this turbulent man-woman-person arena and the luxury of pondering and unraveling some of those feelings through this forum.
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