Need Advice? Ask Kitten!

in #askkitten6 years ago (edited)

I have lovingly been granted the title "Steemit Psychiatrist" by several Steemians. People are drawn to me for advice, and I enjoy helping. I am by no means a doctor of any sort, but I will happily talk things through with you, and share my insight if it is relevant.

But get this one thing straight: I don't shrink heads, I empower souls :)

I have been asked more than once to begin an advice column, and this question I found in my inbox last week sealed the deal. I feel this gentleman's question is one that many men ask and all should know the answer. Therefore, I am starting Steemits very own Ask Kitten advice column!

Dear Kitten,

My wife and I got married after we found out she was pregnant. We have only been dating 10 months but it felt right. We are right for each other, she is like my missing puzzle piece. We never fight and I love her very much. I see myself growing old with her.

At least the above used to be true.

As soon as we got married she turned into a completely different person! She is always mad at me for anything- if my sock misses the hamper she yells at me for an hour! It's getting to where I don't want to come home at night because I know she's going to go off on me for something stupid and little. My friends say that's what happens in marriage, that the girl changes and shows her true colors, but it cannot be this different, can it? And I've heard that pregnancy hormones make a girl crazy, is that true?

I don't know what to do, I want to support her and be there for her but she's driving me crazy.

Scared Husband



Dear Scared Husband,

Picture this- you have a rapidly growing thing inside you. It is forcing you to eat strange foods, changing your body structure and making parts painful, using your bladder as a boxing bag at the most inopportune moments, causing you to vomit uncontrollably, making you change your television viewing habits, and completely turning your entire reality inside out.

You'd be a little miffed too ;)

Pregnancy hormones are very real, and how drastically they change a woman, even from one moment to the next, is alarmingly profound. I love horror and thriller films, but when I was pregnant I just couldn't watch them. Nope. I also had this undeniable need to change every room in the house by rearranging furniture, buying wall hangings and throws, then I would go back through and completely change everything yet a different way when I thought I was finished. This is called "nesting" and you cannot control it. Nor could I control my emotions. I would cry like a baby from an insurance commercial. Then suddenly get exceedingly irritated at the shirt I was wearing, which just a moment ago was my favorite shirt.

Your wife is growing a tiny human inside her. It is also producing its own hormones. All these hormones are creating a healthy little person but giving your wife an alternate personality. And if this is her first pregnancy, remember this is all new and scary for her, too. She cannot control all these changes and emotions she is experiencing.

This is an important time because stress is bad for the baby. You have to bite your tongue and keep reminding yourself it is not her, it's the hormones! Remember, it's not personal! She does not mean anything she says or does, (well, not most of it) it is beyond her control.

She needs your help and support right now. You will have to do a lot of apologizing for things beyond your control, and you're going to have to do a lot of agreeing. However difficult it may seem, she needs you. The patience you learn to exercise now will help a thousandfold when your mini me arrives :)

Congratulations Daddy to Be! You're going to be a good one.



If you would like advice on love, life, Steemit, the Apocalypse, platypuses, or whatever tickles you, message me in Discord. If your question is featured on an episode of #AskKitten you will remain anonymous. And if you wish to remain anonymous to me as well, just register a second account on Discord with a generic username. But I promise to always keep your identity confidential.


I appreciate your support :)

With Love, Light and Good Mojo!

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A good start-up...
Coming to the missing socks, my wife yells at me if one of my socks is missing (although she is not expecting )because she knows by experince that these missing socks will magically re-appear under the coach pillows when visitors come :)
I try to convince her that they go to the parallel universe and come back any time but she refuses to believe me...

source

Stay positive.

FD.

Oh honey, tell her to talk to me. I have been doing the laundry for eight feet for the greater part of two decades. I can attest to the fact that yes, there is a parallel universe of socks. We Earthlings are outnumbered 37 to 1 by Socklings. And new ones are brought forth every drier cycle, with alternates being sent back on Randomtime.

Thank you, you will save my life...please also tell her not to get mad at me for the things that we live in real life, which she laughs when she watch them in sit-coms.
At the end of the day, give tragedy some time and it will become comedy right :)

FD.

Does she get angry at you when you act like Raymond? Lol

No...mostly when I act like Al Bundy...

Well, there's your first clue...

:P

I love this, but of course I love you, so it natural to love your brilliant creative writing styles. I have a radio show on sundays called romance on the air, do you mind if I share this story on air with my listeners?

Also, how do people send you this?

Yes, of course sweets! Please share :)

People have been contacting me usually via Discord, that's where I am the most. But I do check SteemitChat more regularly as there's some who don't like Discord.

My name is the same everywhere :)

Thanks doll! 💜

Nice article. As a dad & husband I went through the same thing. A lot of patience and understanding is required. Just agree with everything because you'll be damned if you do and damned if you don't. The hormones do indeed make the girl crazy. You have to overlook this.

Also, when she's done being crazy, she will know how crazy she was. They don't just snap out of it and forget how they treated you. This realization will come with rewards if you've done your part.

Communication is key, but when she's pregnant, you're better of just nodding your head and even that will get you into trouble. It's normal, and being able to soldier through the pregnancy will definitely let her see that you are indeed a great man and she made the right decision.

I could not have said it better <3

Your wife is fortunate to have you :)

This is fantastic work, @arbitrarykitten. Everyone in this world is caught up with some difficult situations and sometimes, you don’t find any easy solutions to solve them. You are trying to solve those and it’s awesome.

Thank you <3

Sometimes we cannot see it clearly because we're too close to the project. So it helps to have someone on the outside looking in :)

I’ll poke you today, have been going through some tough situations from the last 17 years and still struggling. I can PM you on steem.chat, right?

You absolutely can reach me on SteemitChat. Same name, ArbitraryKitten.

I'm on Pacific coast USA time, so it's 2am now and I'm going in search of the cool side of my pillow :) But I check messages after my morning coffee so I look forward to talking with you <3

Hehehe, sure. I will try to write my long long story as short as I can. Reply me whenever you get free, no rush. I am actually not at home so as soon I get my laptop, will PM you.
Stay blessed.

wow, kitten i did'nt know you came this far, people asking you for advice? just wow congrats you are now the super knowledge elite , it must feels wonderful, just hold on , i m on ma way too , as i finish writing my first book , i ll join you in your nobel endavour :)
yours, racem :)

It does. And here I'm just me, you know? I'm very humbled that my words and experiences can be of benefit to someone <3 It makes my heart warm :)

Good for you kitten. I'm aiming to go to pro in writing and perhaps join a virtual university in USA😁😁

That's kind of you kitten to offer help :D Sometimes all we need is someone to listen.

I am here to listen anytime :) And I always have an open shoulder <3

Do you give advice to feline mustelids?

Trust me, I'm a doctor.

Catweasel-c.png

Why yes, I do give advice to weasels that purr :)

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Love this line "I don't shrink heads, I empower souls :)".Just love it

Thanks for sharing this

Thank you for reading :)

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