Philosophy of Use: Orderly Cubes of Chaos and Reflecting on the Journey

There is much to say about the psychedelic experience. The trip, after all, is the exciting part of using psychedelic substances. It is the act of discovering hidden knowledge about the self and the world. It is the psychonaut's quest and his or her journey through the underworld of his or her consciousness is always exciting to talk about. However, when the trip ends, the work is not finished. Coming to terms with the new knowledge one gains through the use of psychedelics is of equal importance to the to the trip itself. The strangeness and the intensity of the psychedelic experience is so great that understanding it and integrating into one's life takes a conscious effort but rewards await those who are willing to recover, reflect, and reconcile.

The quest is complete and the psychonaut has returned to reality bearing his or her secret inner knowledge but it still must be deciphered like an ancient and unknown text. Psychedelics can bring about a deeply meaningful enlightenment but their lessons are strange and and their language is foreign. The intensity of the experience can make memory difficult and its abstract nature requires thoughtful interpretation. In ancient times or in cultures that have embraced the use of psychedelic substances, this labor may fall upon a shaman, a priest, or some other person who specializes in this sort of task but we, in the modern world, do not have access to these resources (for the most part). Instead, we must act on our own behalf and try to understand the significance of our own visions, thoughts, and feelings.

The process of coming to terms with a psychedelic quest begins with psychical recovery. These substances are (generally) pretty safe but they are still a bit taxing on the body and mind. A trip can last quite some time (depending on the particular substance one uses) and, during the experience, things like eating and sleeping are difficult, at best. When one finds that he or she has returned to reality, it is often rejuvenating to have a hearty and nourishing meal. The journey was difficult, and eventful, and it leaves one drained of his or her strength. Before the psychonaut can undertake the task of unraveling the mystery of his or her newly discovered wisdom, he or she must see to his or her most basic of needs. Eat, and sleep, and rest so that you will have the necessary energy to examine your experience.

Before the returning psychonaut can reconcile his or her new knowledge with the reality of the world, he or she must take some time to meditate upon the journey. One of the most common features of a trip is the time distortion. Hours can, quite literally, feel like weeks. One's mind has, in effect, experiences more thought than it can process in real-time This being the case, retrospective reflection is required. It is productive to take a period of abstinence from further usage for a brief time. During this span, one should try to re-envision the experience which he or she has had. It is important to determine what about the trip stands out as significant and why it has meaning. What were your visions of? How did they make you feel? What meaning do they take on when that feeling is applied to them and how does this affect the way you view the self and the worlds, both external and internal, which it inhabits? These are important questions and answering them is rewarding.

To illustrate my meaning, I will tell a short story: I was very young (no longer a child but not yet an adult, maybe sixteen years old) and, not surprisingly, I was very inexperienced. I had consumed some tea made from a particular fungus and the peak of the trip had arrived. Suddenly, I felt compelled to close my eyes, not knowing what to expect. For a brief moment, there was nothing but blackness. Then, I began to notice a seemingly infinite depth to this dark void. After a moment, life and light began to emerge from the nothingness. Neon patterns and shapes flowed into my perception briefly forming recognizable images that would quickly melt back into abstract masses. The bright lines and colorful tiles would spin and, for a moment, take the shape of a calendar like those used by some of the indigenous peoples in South and Central America. Next, the tiles would flee and be replaced by new shapes and colors. I saw fleeting scenes, like a frieze carved into the walls of an ancient temple, that depicted people toiling in a field, making war, and bowing to strange gods. These things were amazing in their own right but what followed was the truly significant "vision." I found myself seeming to "float" in the darkness when an infinite field of transparent cubes flowed into view. All of these cubes were in perfectly straight rows, lines, and columns. All were outlined in a neon light of shifting color, each had its walls covered in shifting patterns, and each pattern was unique.

In that moment, I felt that I was on the edge of a realization and that these cubes were the representation of a lesson that I must learn. However, I was unable to grasp on to the lesson of the cubes while in the midst of the event. The trip continued and, eventually, the unreal faded away and normality was restored. In the following days, I took time to think about that particular hallucination and about how it made me feel. I spoke about it to others and tried to describe it to them. In time, I found that a phrase kept coming to mind in relation to this vision. That phrase was "infinite chaos within infinite order". It was then that I began to understand the meaning of what I saw. Each cube contained chaos (shifting unique patterns) but their chaos existed within a greater system of order. I began to apply this message to my view of the world and of myself. The chaotic events we see in the world exist within the order of our nature, the chaos of the universe exists within the order of its laws, and the chaos of thought exists within the order of the mind. I came to know that if we understand these greater orders, the chaos that lives with them ceases to be unpredictable. In short, the grander pattern of existence seemed to have been relieved.

This deeper understanding is the real value of the psychedelic experience, in my opinion. It is not enough that the psychedelic hero drags back the knowledge from the under-consciousness. His or her prize is of little value if he or she cannot unlock the box in which it is contained. If you choose to sail across the ocean of the soul don't forget to look back when your journey is complete, lest you lose your treasures.

Peace.

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