Things that you should know as earlier as possible after 20s

Learn how to endure loneliness, and enjoy the loneliness so that you can truly be independent. Broaden your visions, so that your scope of mind can be improved and your life will be better. The state of life today is determined by the choice you made five years ago, and today's choices will also determine the state of life five years later.

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Make a living ≠ independent

Make a living will always be prerequisite of independent.

However, make a living will never represent the true independence.

True independence encompasses economic independence, life independence, and spiritual independence.

The most visible and most dangerous is the spiritual independence.

Many people have the habit of "doing something with others," whether at work or in life.

During work, we follow what others people do. After work, go for shopping, movie together with colleagues or friends. Almost everything is done with someone.

Doing something with others can give us a sense of security. But this collective consciousness often deprives the freedom and independent will.

You obviously have your ideas, but you have to give up your ideas when your idea is different from others;

You obviously have a movie you want to watch, but you still follow others to watch another movie;

You have your idea, but in the end, you still work according to other people's opinions.

In the end, you find yourself always doing something against your will and complaining about yourself. All this is caused by the spiritual independence.

Gregarious, will only make you look less lonely, and let yourself avoid becoming heterogeneous. But the so-called gregarious, sacrifice the spiritual independence of a person, to a larger extent, it will destroy a person.

We are born to be a person, loneliness is the most basic condition of survival. Only by acting alone and thinking independently, can help us learn something.

Learn to endure loneliness and enjoy loneliness, so that you can truly be independent.

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Prudence is always important

A man who is not wild at the age of 20 is good-for-nothing.

A closed mouth catches no flies. This is an ancient wisdom that has been verified countless times. I know a guy, called James, he works very hard, and his relationship with his boss is also very good.

But one day, he heard the boss and his wife on the phone, he casually said to his boss, "You looked so successful, I did not expect you to be a henpecked husband, haha!" Because of this, whenever there is a promotion, the boss will deliberately embarrass him.

Many people when first entered the society, they naively thought that it was enough to do a good job. However, everyone knows that every seemingly fair boss is an ordinary person with emotions.

You will end your career if you say something wrong. This is never alarmist, but a living fact.

Another example I know is also very daunting.

During working day, a girl wants to invite a male colleague to eat lunch. After lunch, she asked the boy to help her carry bags, as a reward for lunch.

It seems to be a joke, the boy did not say anything, but he felt very humiliated in his heart.

Later, the boy work at a big enterprise, the big enterprise want to bring the girl over too. But the boy said she don’t have enough experience and very irresponsible.

The girl missed the opportunity, lingered for several years, has been disconsolate. 

Prudence may not get any obvious, direct benefits. But if not discreet, it is likely to pay for the reckless and frivolous for a long time.

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Love is not everything in your life

I watched an emotional program, where the man and woman complained about each other on the stage.

The woman accused the man contact her too frequently during working hour, and make her repeatedly loses her job. The man complains the woman has too much demand, make him had to take leave, and cannot concentrate on work.

And their income status is, Woman: unemployed, no income, Man: earn more than $1000 a month. 

This makes the host and the guests speechless: you can't support each other, but you still want to get into relationship with each other?

But it's not a joke! This is normal for many young people.

20 years old is the most beautiful in life, the taste of first love is sweet, unavoidably addicted into it.

When you fall in love with a person, there is always a "without him/her will be meaningless" illusion.

However, after go through it, you will find that a relationship is unforgettable, but is also an episode in your life, it is not the ending.

A person's daily life, include his career, feelings and lives.

The more the energy devoted to the relationship, the more the cause and the life will be compressed. In order to improve the quality of life and expand the career pattern, we should reduce the input of emotion.

Two people must have a process of mutual understanding.

This process does not have to be too long, a short period of six months, more than one year. More time should be used on the blade, to engage in a career, for the individual, for the family, for the country, and for the world.

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Other than work, you need to have other skills

Specificity is good, but the single-minded work is often dangerous.

What you're good at today, might be replaced by another industry or artificial intelligence.

So the slash becomes the trend. However, some people hold the idea of "one can’t do well with multiple skills", feel sorry for having different skill sets.

Focus is good. But you also need to spend some time and energy to master skills outside of your job.

Even if only spend 10 minutes a day, learn a foreign language, practice new technology, years later, there will be a great harvest, and open another door in your life.

Have extra skillsets, will give you a backup plan in the future, and you can also use the new skillsets in your current profession. On the other hand, different skills will bring different social circles and different social circles will bring different visions.

Broaden your vision, the scope of vision can be improved, and life will be better.

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Learn to be disciplined

When you are young, you should read more books, because you can't remember anything when you are old.

Play less game, because it's not fair as the older people play games with money.

Don't drink unless you want to get drunk, or you are just wasting money;

In fact, the logic behind all this is: take advantage of the young, to self-discipline.

"Youth is artificial" is the creed of many young people. They are always driven by a sense of crisis to squander time and waste energy because they believe that they can’t do anything when are old.

However, the greater sense of crisis in life is: after you are old, there is no chance and no energy to struggle again.

You think the artificial is very cool, but the fact is: when you put in all your time to a game, but the older people spend money and less time in the game and have a higher achievement than you. You spent all your time and energy now, but in the future you will need more energy, to reduce the gap with others.

Many people looked back, only to find that they have family, responsibility, children, trivial fetters, and unable to fight wholeheartedly.

At the same time, physical and memory also began to decline, become powerless.

So, from the age of more than 20, while all is still not too late, start develop a self-discipline habits. Early to bed and early to rise, read, run, make your life worthy, but also have a good habits to your future.

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Have a clear goal

The state of life of a person today is determined by the choice of five years ago, and today's choices also determine the state of life five years later.

If you do not know your goal today, five years later is likely to be a muddle, drifting away.

And a clear goal, not only provide the direction of struggle, but also bring the strength of perseverance. Only when the goal is clear, we can firmly move forward.

In management, there is a general model called PDCA, PLAN, DO, CHECK and ADJUST. PDCA Cycle is in accordance with the order of quality management, and recycling more than the scientific process.

This model also applies to the management in our life quality.

In the continuous planning, implementation, inspection, correction, and gradually close to the goal, and live the life we want.

The most unsatisfactory in life is work for the job you don’t like, live in a life you don’t like, and do not love the person you married with. Unfortunately, many people live in this life.

Only by determine goals early, and then unremitting efforts, so that we can jump out of this predicament.

Finally, remember a credo: When you doing something, if the benefit you get from it is just a short moments of happiness, try not to do it.

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