Society: "Be yourself." Society: "No, not like that"

in #freedom3 years ago (edited)

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Be Yourself.

Over the past few years, hearing “be yourself” has really been a popular thing. As much as we hear it, there is still a lot of fear around it. We know deep down, that even though it’s encouraged, we'll still be judged.

Society doesn’t want to judge, but many feel “not good enough,” themselves. The people that are out paving the way, doing things different and showing up as their authentic selfs, become a bit of a threat and possibly creating some jealousy.

They know that fear, just like the ones that have stepped out of their comfort zones and started become more their authentic selves and chasing dreams. The rest of society is aware of the risk that comes along with it. It’s just too scary for them, so they attack those that have chosen to face those fears of judgment and do it anyway.

It’s like there’s unspoken rules of society.

Bowing to the rules of the right and wrongs on society, or you will be judged.

We look to society for approval and permission

We use it as a measurement to our own self worth.

NOTHING will ever be good enough for the society we live in.

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Can we create a new society?

Honouring and having compassion for each other and respecting others opinions, cultures, choices and beliefs.

To actually be fully and truly our authentic selves.

It would be more interesting. Not all striving for the same things.

This thing we’ve got going on now, trying to fit into predetermined boxes of what’s “right”. Where everyone is influenced to be the same and do the same.

Fuck society.

Boycott the “unspoken rules.”

Now, more than ever before, we need to step out of the comfort zone we have created.

We need to see the fears for what they are. Merely, just playing it safe and staying small so we aren’t noticed.

We need to make others feel good about themselves, so they too, can step out of their own comfort zones.

We need to wake up and start seeing different perspectives.

We couldn’t please society if we tried.

As painful as it is sometimes, we turn to it like some kind of security blanket. We turn to it for answers, permission and acceptance. But it always compromises the truth.

It feels safe, so we can’t stop. We are addictive to safe, secure and knowing for sure.

If we could practice that one thing of, not knowing, not being for sure, willing to feel uncertain and unsafe, just for a small amount of time, just to see what that feels like, to get use to what that feels like little by little.

Meanwhile, strengthening our own intuition to guide us.

If we want to stop being slaves to society, we need to stop playing by those rules (even as safe as they feel sometimes) We need to be brave, bold and curious. Taking chances on ourselves.

We are 100% responsible for our own lives, nobody else can do this for us. Here, is where we’ll feel the most alone, but when we start to meet each other on the other side, once we’ve become free of the influence of society, a new society will be born. At the end of the day, we have the choice.

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Many will stay, but I personally, want to go.

I feel the trapped feeling, I feel the uncomfortable feeling when I step outside of the norms. But my soul has spoken up and longs for more. I have a deep down knowing that I am more. The essence of who I am knows I am free.

I know how I want to feel in all areas of my life. And when I match that to what society approves of, it’s not a good fit.

I know it will be challenging, It already has been. I have all ready taken some of my fears and set them aside, “just to see” to test the waters, and it feels free.

As much as it feels I am doing it, oh so subtle, it’s warming me up and it is becomingly new “normal”. Fears are fading more and more. My deep down feeling of true freedom is strengthening.

I want others to take that journey with me. I want to inspire and empower others to create this change in their own lives. To remember who they really are.

I believe this platform is the perfect place for us to practice that rebellious act of boycotting societies rules.

I feel more free to write here, without the “what will people think” question in the back of my mind, like I would, with the traditional social media platforms. Compromising the message to fit the minds of the majority.

I have 2 boys, ages 12 and 8. I have witnessed the impact society has had on them already. The school systems and the act of fitting in. It makes me sad, I am committed to always support them and tell them often they are perfect just the way they are but society is powerful, more than I, myself can take on. I can only hope that sometimes they listen and that later on, they may know too, deep down, they are enough, and they don’t need to play by those rules.

My husband and I both are trying to set an example of the opposite of what we have been taught. “go to school, follow the rules, get good grades, go to university, get a “good job”, get married, buy a house, have a family = happiness)

We both are entrepreneurs. I want my sons to know they can create their own work, and it can be meaningful work that they love. That they don’t need to go to university for the mere sake of going to university, but to go for the interest of learning what they think they want to learn at the that time.

To do it for themselves, not for society, or what I think. I see their power, their creative little soles that are so bright and good-hearted. I can only guide them and hope that within the next decade things will start to change.

I need to continue to set a good example.

My message here today is, be yourself, there are no limitations. Do your thing, even if it feels scary. Be who you really are. Listen to your gut more often. Test the waters of the unknown. Society will always be there with resistance, but we can practise seeing beyond it, when we decide, once and for all, “those rules aren’t for me” more freedom will be born.

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Very good article.
Re children, it is going to be a huge struggle for any non-conformist parents to undo the indoctrination of school, peers (hah!) and media.
Can't you home educate them?

My own daughter is smart, sociable, perceptive, eloquent, charming, helpful - a healer and dreamer. Now, do I really want education to fuck her up? She's already getting bored - bad sign.

If you read Iserbyt's blog and book, you will see that the aim of education is no longer to teach anything apart from social conformity and... that's it!

For me, I'm not willing to home school, as I don't believe it would be the best option for my family. Some parents are better at that than others. To be honest, I try to educate them as much as I can about stuff I know they aren't going to learn at school. "the real world".

I think it's important for us, as parents, to pay attention to where the future is headed. We may not always be able to know exactly what's best to teach them, but if we can prepare them with some insight, It would help.

We need to keep it fresh in their minds, of who they really are, so they recognize when they start to wonder off trying to be something or someone they aren't, just to fit into society.

It's a tough one.
I will look into the blog and book you mentioned. An interesting topic for sure (kind of scary, really)

Thanks for sharing your view.

Yes, as you say, even without the extreme of home-schooling, it is about reminding them of who they really are - rather than who society wants them to be. I see it with my own daughter; we need to keep fresh the experiences she has that others appear not to have, such as healing abilities and lucid dreaming. They are not things schools will ever teach.

Standing ovation. Beautifully put.

Very well written post @tressareid

Steemit is a richer place thanks to your content and people like you. We are the pioneers!

As an entrepreneur myself, I can relate to a lot of what you say.

I look forward to your future blogs. If I miss it, do give me a nudge so I can come and vote and resteem.

All the best
@kabir88

Thank you very much for your kind words!

Being an entrepreneur, we tend to be exposed to a lot....lol See you around :)

Freedom is defined very differently depending on who is describing it. I prefer to stick with individual liberty instead. From what you wrote, you seem to be a liberty lover. I'm curious where you stand more specifically though related to government and voluntaryism. Are you an anarchist or voluntaryist? If those terms don't work for you, perhaps just expand on the idea from your perspective.

I agree, freedom is defined differently with everyone and can mean very different things. I really have not labelled myself as any of those things, as I have just been learning the definition of each of them over the past couple of months. So I don't really know exactly what category I'd fall under. And to be honest, I didn't even realize there were so many others feeling the pull towards that kind of freedom. It has opened my perspective (and maybe has justified my beliefs even that much more, that it's possible)

The freedom I speak of, comes from a deep down longing desire to feel free and not dictated to. I am sensitive to seeing around me, the amount of influence that drives the people of society. I've spend many years myself, trying to fit into a box, it just doesn't work for me.

Overtime, I have lost faith in government systems. They seem so old-school, outdated and ineffective. I think they are doing more damage than good. I think they have created unnecessary fear that keeps people in-line.

The whole idea of what we are "suppose" to do or what we "should" do, really gets me.

I am a very intuitive person and freedom is a core desire in my world. Call me a rebel, I just don't like following the rules...lol

I think as humans though, we are hard wired to be followers on some level, so even in a more free world, influences will still play a part, but it would nice to see there be more freedom of choice and options as to what kind of leadership/influence it could be and without the rules.

I thank you for the detailed response. It is very helpful. I too believe there will always be leaders and leadership. The key difference is that people will voluntarily elect and follow those people. They will not be above the law, given special rights, or protected by double standards.

Go to any crowded place, and look at the people there. That's anarchy. Almost everyone seeks peaceful and voluntary interaction with other humans. It is what most people desire. The few predators among us who do not can easily be dealt with without creating a system that they naturally gravitate towards.

Then they use that system to rule over everyone and abuse them.

Interesting discussion, I will love to take part if you let me in...
There are some points I want to bring:
1- As described in “The story of Stuff” it was a moment in recent history where States (Goverments) flipped from serve people (who vote them) to Multinational enterprises interests (who get the 51% of the world money and power).
2- Those labels you wrote in the first comment are that, lables. Most of them created by the system itself (and the monky mind) to categorize all of us. I agree it’s convenient to have words and labels to communicate between ourselves but is dangerous as “definition of self”. That was one of the points of the article itself...
3 - Leadershipping and Anarchy aren’t opposite (maybe you don’t tried to say that and i lost myself in translation being spanish guy and english language far from my native tongue) due in fact it requires a true leadershipping of your own self to be truly “anarchist”. I’m not talking in the way society “labels” it (hollywood directly describes it as terrorism), I’m talking in the way Thoreau describes it in books like Walden.
Romantic and wild, could be... but in any case a self empowering job of taking care of yourself and reponsability of your decisions, acts, words, feels...

So I don’t care how others label me and try to avoid even labels about myself and say “Here are my two hands, my heart and soul. How can I express myself completely honest and what can I bring to the Life as improvement”*
That’s it.

*Personal lifecation of Bruce Lee teachings extracted from “The Lost interview”

Agreed! Leadership is very different from being a ruler. I agree about the labels issue too. It seems too many different definitions apply to the same words too, so it is better to explain our motivations and end objectives instead. My objective is to defend and further individual liberty as much as possible.

Yeah I followed you after check few comments and searching articles in your blog. I found your POV very interesting. Can you suggest me any post about the topics you explained? I’m still new to the platform and I find hard to understand about “reestemed” post and how to read something yours... and I will love to learn more!
Thanks for positive chat :)

Most people do not watch their feeds, so honestly having something resteemed doesn't help much. I used to think it was pretty valuable, but it just doesn't help as much as you'd think. Once you are over about 100 followed, your feed is a mess. It's impossible to look through it.

I use GINAbot instead to look for key words. That way I do not miss the content I really want to see. Then I can interact with those authors and in those conversations to engage people better. It's the best way to find friends and people with similar interests too.

First of all thanks for your advice. Really appreciated and “mess” describe quite well how my feed (with near 20 people) is becoming to feel...
I supose GINAbot is for desktop? I have some troubles ATM... I use mainly iPad as computer after sold my mac mini 2 years ago (aprox) and even I tried to use steemit on old core2duo laptop I managed... it works junk with win7 (I need to try again with linux) but truly PITA to set a working “publisher” machine. I will need to add somekind of search solution like GINAbot... I see...
I was wondering why nobody made a blog with curating other blogs and adding somekind of review like old tv shows (like MTV) or News... it will require a bit of work but if we manage to work as grouped blogs maybe we can distribute topics or similar (somekind of planned publishing to make things more user friendly)
Anyways I have a lot to learn so I will look into GINAbot as you adviced me.
Thanks once again @finnian!

This is such a great post!

If we could practice that one thing of, not knowing, not being for sure, willing to feel uncertain and unsafe, just for a small amount of time, just to see what that feels like, to get use to what that feels like little by little.

I really resonate with your message. In large part, I feel like my life has been growing to those edges and continually discovering how I truly want to live instead of following the prescribed norms that itch, chafe and stifle my soul. That inner feeling knows. Thanks for this inspiring post! Resteemed!

I definitely believe it's a process. But once we start, there's no going back! :)

Thanks so much for reading and resteeming! I greatly apprciate it.

a very universal and inspirational message, beautifully conveyed...

Thank you for reading and commenting! :)

Was gonna upvote before I saw your Danielle LaPorte quote in your banner, but that sealed the deal. <3 Entrepreneur mamas, unite!

lol, Isn't she the best?!

Definitely over feeling like myself is not enough! Thank you for this motivating and uplifting post.

You've been upvoted + resteemed by the #LadiesofSteemit initiative. Keep up the great work! 🔥

Thank you so much for the support! I am proud to be a lady of steemit, such great a great platform!!

Nice post @tressareid. I believe that you can nothing but yourself, even when you are being fake to please the world..

Thanks! Sometimes being fake takes just as much effort. The truth will always set us free.

Nice thoughts here, and I agree with you. There's a book called The Big Leap, which talks about the "upper limit," like a ceiling that restricts our freedom. That's the edge of a comfort zone, as you say, and the beginning of a breakthrough. I relate with other parts of your story too, being a parent entrepreneur. Welcome to Steemit!

I feel like I've heard of that book, Im going to look into it. Thanks for reading and for the Welcome to Steemit. I'm really enjoying the platform so far! :)

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I'm learning so much, I will read through these links and learn more about @ocd. It sounds as though there is some real true support here. I greatly appreciate it!

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