Hey all. Welcome back to another exciting Team Australia update. Hopefully this will bring a little warmth into your cold, winter, Monday morning – especially if you’re at death’s door like @gohba.handcrafts and @bulleth who’ve been struck down with the so called “man flu”. 

It is unclear whether @sirknight has also been infected since he has not yet published the results of  the referendum. @badastroza on the other hand has taken preventative measures by ditching his wetsuit and the cold winter waters of Torquay to go surfing in Bali for four weeks. 

Thanks for all the positive feedback on my tragic love life. I’m glad my general dating shitness could provide you all with some light-hearted entertainment at my own expense. On that, it has been suggested to me by @sirknight that I should start doing steemit match making. All I have to say to this is: 

Hahahahahahahahaha!

1. No one should take dating advice from me. Ever. 
2. There’s already a steemit dating service with a dedicated chat room on the Whaleshares Discord server. It doesn’t look that popular though. The last message posted was last Thursday.

Keeping with this dating theme, legendary Minnow Support Project founder, whale, and active PAL Discord chat guy @aggroed has been encouraging a Minnow Make-out Challenge in the late night sessions in General. His rational is that now that the MSP membership is approaching 4000, it’s only a matter of time. He says that with this many people onboard there must be at least two minnows out there who are attracted to each other enough to get it on.  

If you have made out with someone you met on steemit (and not your spouse or someone you already know in real life), get into General and let him know. He’ll be stoked and will probably throw you an upgoat just for being a legend and proving his point. I've gotta admit, this sounds like the most fun challenge I've seen so far on steemit.

Obviously attending Steemfest "Hot-and-steemy-fest" would increase your chances greatly, but Portugal seems like a long way to go for a pash. It's probably cheaper and more convenient just to organise up a meetup where you live and hope that not everyone who turns up is married.

It’s unclear whether @aggroed requires photographic evidence of smooching at this stage.

The official notices 

Until the referendum results are in, existing Team Australia members please go here and follow everyone that’s been added since you last checked. 

Be sure to check out @centerlink, who is busy putting Aussie-battler tax dollars to work in the form of dole payments for posts, as well as showcasing Australia's most worthy dole recipients. But watch out, audits are taking place to crack down on dole bludgers. You’d better get your paperwork in order in case you are subject to a random inspection. 

The first victim was @tremendospercy, although he seems to have survived on a technicality of being a founding member of TeamAustralia and some Commonwealth sweetheart deal between Australia and the Motherland. 

Don’t forget the Minister for Welfare @ausbitbank has also created the @discordia bot, which you can use to increase your upvote moolah. Some of the proceeds will support @centerlink so give it a try.

Of course, also check out the awesome Minnow Support Project. Details on how to join are are here and here. You can also come say hi in Discord. It's fun and you can make new friends!       

I’m still struggling a bit to find new Aussies. I did another trawl of the Australia tag a few days ago and reached out to some more potential candidates (current count 136), but they’ve been slow in responding. 

In the words of ex-cricket WAG and Tourism Australia poster girl Lara Bingle: 

Candidate 1 

Name and bio 

@zainab25 is from the Netherlands where she lives with her husband and son. She recently started a new job with a Japanese company while still running her own bookkeeping business. When she was nineteen @zainab25 converted to Islam. She would like to share these stories about her life with steemit while developing her writing skills.  

@zainab25 wants to be a Team Australia ambassador because she likes the community we’ve created. When she thinks of Australia, she thinks of kangaroos and hopes to visit to see them in the wild one day. 

Fun fact  

“I'm a perfectionist. When my husband wants to be nice and help me to hang the laundry I don't say no because then he might never offer again. But when he's helping me my fingers are itching to correct his higgledy-piggledy hanging technique but I wait until he's left the room.” 

I know some guys deliberately do a half-arsed job at domestic chores just to get out of having to do them again, but if he keeps offering then it doesn’t seem likely that he’s one of them. Maybe you should just re-hang your clothes so that when his come in dry and out of shape, he’ll get the picture and do a better job next time. 

Candidate 2 

Name and bio 

@dardi is an Aussie mum who is currently travelling around Australia in a campervan with her husband, three kids, and a fat English Bull Terrier named Yoshi. Her adventure started two years ago when her and her husband rented out their house and left their careers. They now home school their kids as they travel.

@dardi has turned into an obsessed fossicker, looking for gold and gemstones in various creeks and rivers around the country. She is also six chapters into writing a novel.  

Fun fact 

"I appeared on Housos (the Boganrama episode) showing them my thong repair kit with a bread clip when they came to Bathurst for the V8 car races." 

Lol. I don’t think there could be anything more bogan than a makeshift fix for a thong blowout at Bathrust! Although this is why my mate Dave says you should always buy double pluggers – keeps you out of trouble.

Candidate 3 

Name and bio 

@reggaemuffin is the latest German ambassador being anointed into Team Australia. I’m sure you’ve heard of him since he manages @welcomebot, built the current version of whaleshares.net, and serves as the CTO of @steemsports and MinnowBooster. He is also a key member of the Build Team, which is responsible for Steemvoter and MinnowBooster merging into one unified business structure. On top of that, @reggaemuffin is also a witness. 

In his spare time (yeah right, like he has any after everything I've just mentioned), @reggaemuffin is a developer and computer science student. He is proficient in many programming languages including Java, PHP, Python, Javascript, and Ruby.  

Fun fact 

“I am actually a skiing instructor, does that help me in Aus?” 

Probably not. Skiing in Australia is not the best compared to other places. But it's still hot. Ski instructor is up there with crossfit instructor and fire fighter.

@sirknight, please add these new members to Team Australia.   

The rules for joining Team Australia

If you’re not yet a member and want to be, this is what you need to do:

1. Follow all the existing members @teamaustralia.
2. Vote here for our resident steemit witness @ausbitbank.
3. Comment below or DM me on steemit chat or Discord that you want to join.
4. Link your introduction post so I can find out a bit about you. If you’re new to steemit you'll have to write one so use the introduceyourself tag to help boost your following. You can also follow this handy guide written by @teamsteem.
5. If it’s not mentioned in your introductory post, tell me which city and country you’re in, cos let's face it, a lot of us live in Australia's fourth largest city - London.  
6. If you’re not Aussie tell me why you should be a teamaustralia ambassador. 
7. Tell me a fun fact about yourself. This can be anything. For example, maybe you run a successful business, or you have eight kids and three dogs, or you rode your bike across Amercia, or you won the blue ribbon for javelin throwing at sports day back in high school, or Toadie came into the pub you work at one day and you served him a beer, or, maybe you can fit 55 maltesers in your mouth like Ed Sheeran can. It doesn’t matter what it is, I want a fun fact about you!

Once I receive this information I will try my best to write a good introductory paragraph about you for the official Team Australia membership updates. So the better your information is, the better I can make you sound. Where relevant, please use the teamaustralia and australia tags to promote your work. I will try and post weekly updates unless there is a lot of interest, in which case I will try and post sooner. 

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Upgoat footer by @ryivhnn

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