{blog} please look after yourselves

in #steem6 years ago (edited)

Hey, I've not been around. There are reasons. Life throws things at you sometimes and when it does so, you need to be equipped in order to deal with them. This is something I realised a few years ago when I discovered that I was dumping myself under undue pressure without respite.

If you want a tl;dr version of this: when life gets hard and you are feeling the pressures of creating content, put down the internet and focus on a little mental hygiene.

At one point I was a Deputy Editor of Inverted Audio. I was sourcing pieces, getting mixes in, sorting track premieres, doing interviews. The whole lot. As the pressures of general life closed in at points, I found it triggered crippling writers block. Eventually I ended up at a place where I had to step down from the editorial team and become more of a casual writer.

Let's just talk about writers block a second here. If you perceive it as a scenario where you sit at a computer and find that you cannot think of the words, you've probably got an incorrect assumption. Instead, you mind can be alive with words, yet you are physically unable to realise them. The thought of sitting down and committing time to producing content is utterly repulsive. You find yourself indulging in pointless procrastination, leafing through endless social media and watching the clock creep into unsocial hours before resetting. A terrible cycle begins. Gradually deadlines slip by, commitments are not met, a sense of debilitating inadequacy descends and the mental pressures double down. At some point you'll break, and it is important to realise this and take actions before this happens.

I started a new day job recently. The last month of my previous job was an absolute horror show and the first two weeks of this new position was spent without a laptop. My wedding is in 3 months, I have a metric tonne of things to afford and some crazy out of the blue financial pressures to contend with. The house is a disaster, the result of too many people in a small space. Somewhere over all of this is the continual nag to create content.

In terms of how this relates Steem, the pressures here are awful. The eternal 7 day countdown of rewards, the continual guidance posts for success that encourage you to post frequently and at incredibly high production values. If you ever find yourself sitting with nothing in your pending payouts, you will experience a gnawing guilt, a sense that you are missing out, going to lose ground.

Don't let this get to you. These are all self imposed constructs. It is ok to step away from the content machine, take some time off, do something else. Focus on the immediate concerns that are facing you. For the past two months, I've been hammering Zelda, Mario Kart and Splatoon 2. The house has had a full declutter and sort out. Everything just feels like I am able to breathe a little more and start tackling matters like finances and the wedding. Gradually, the scope to create content is creeping back in, and I can start hitting up the IA front page once again. The most important factor here is that I stepped away, didn't beat myself up about it and, most importantly, didn't break my back to continue to live up to some sort of expectation.

So this is my plea to all of the creators out there having a hard time. Step away. Don't feel bad about it. Take a moment to yourself and, when you are ready, step back into the Steemit arena slowly. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone, so make sure you put yourself first.

I'm still going to be a bit patchy. I've got some old Inverted Audio articles to slap up. But I'm sure I'll return in earnest when things are a little less challenging. You'll notice that this post is completely without images and formatting. It has also been written entirely off the cuff and without my usual passes of self-editing. This is intentional, just to let you know it is ok to simply put a post out there and not to worry about the make-or-break burden of viral rewards.

Look after yourselves Steemians and don't burn out.

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I think that sooner or later everybody will have to go through something similar. At the beginning of the June I also stepped into a quite busy area which forced me to slow down with posting frequency. Lower frequency doesn't mean that I am completely leaving Steemit. Actually I feel like I'm starving and I have to write something, but the time is killing me, I am using my computer literally for few minutes per day. Recently I posted a short #technofriday content about Umwelt and later I was mad on myself that I dropped short note about one song only. Later, during the whole week I was collecting materials to drop the bigger and better content and it was extremely motivating for me. Keep your head up man !

This post is old, and I just came across it, and wanted to say: fuck yeah. Self-care is important over all. A break is needed sometimes to clear the head. I’ve followed you for when you come back.

I actually did wonder where you went. I'm glad you are working things out. I went through something similar lately after having my first child. I tend to settle in to a routine so overloaded that the force needed to tip the scale is minimal, and your situation sounds similar. Looking forward to reading your posts again!

Your post was manually selected and voted for by @illuminati-inc (IINC) with support of @curie. About IINC: here. About Curie: here.

I feel you on this one. I've been able to post mainly due to being on mobile pretty frequently, but create quality content is a completely different story. If I didn't largely post in a quick song of the day format I would have likely stopped posting for the last 2 months. Take care of you. Just glad to see you haven't abandoned the platform as I really enjoy your writing.

Even my monthly playlists take a lot to get out there. I’m secretly quite sad that Zappl didn’t appear to be working out as I’d have thrived on a short and sweet and iOS friendly format.

I’m all good though!

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Hey, hope things will sort out for you. Sounds like you had a stressful time. Glad to hear that things are working better for you at the time.

From my own experience. A wedding should be a nice thing. If you have to use more money or time than you can afford, maybe it's best to downsize. Remember that people come to celebrate you and your partner. It shouldn't have to be a party that ruin you! Good friends and family will accept and understand that!

Take care!

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