Four simple agreements to improve your steemit experience and every aspect of your life!

in spirituality •  last year


Three years ago I read a book called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and I can honestly say that it was a life-changer for me.

Insights possessed by the Toltecs a thousand years ago, in the region now known as Mexico led to the creation of four simple 'agreements' that one makes with themselves in order to live a more balanced & contented life. Which ultimately benefited the community as a whole.

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Don Miguel Ruiz does not call them 'rules' because he suggests that we should not have to enforce them like rules. Rather, we make an agreement with ourselves that we should always strive towards putting them into practice in our daily lives.

He says in his book “you need a very strong will in order to adopt the Four Agreements—but if you can begin to live your life with these agreements, the transformation in your life will be amazing. You will see the drama of hell disappear right before your very eyes. Instead of living in a dream of hell, you will be creating a new dream—your personal dream of heaven.”

Toltec Temple ChichenItza, Mexico
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Ruiz also states that all children are born perfectly loving, playful and genuine. Which as a father to a 19month old baby, I completely agree with. My son Esteban reminds me of this on a daily basis.

However, us parents tend to teach them standards of behavior they must follow in order to receive love and avoid criticism. Eventually these standards become internalised into a life script: an unconscious set of instructions for living. And the key to freedom is to become aware of our irrational and limiting thoughts so that we can replace them with healthy ones.

I post daily Abraham quotes here because I am a firm believer in the Law of Attraction - which basically states that like attracts like. So simply put, positive thoughts attract positive events!

Check out the one I posted this morning:

Having just read 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne a few months earlier (which looks exclusively at the Law of Attraction) the words of Ruiz really really rang true for me.

The importance of a having a system

The problem was putting the theory behind Law of Attraction into practice. It's all well and good saying 'Just think positive thoughts!' but another thing altogether when it actually comes to doing it. Our minds work on auto-piolot most of the time and we are not even aware of it. Past experiences can create knee-jerk reactions which happen so quickly, the words come out and then there's no turning back... because they usually just create more anger!

The Four Agreements came at the perfect time for me (as is the way with the Law of Attraction!) for suddenly I had a system to stick to. A simple system I could memorise and practice every day until it became second nature to me.

Ruiz goes on to describe the four agreements in great detail in his book, perhaps even padding it out a little more than necessary, but that's how it is when you write a book that can be condensed into four paragraphs!

So, without further ado I give you the essence of his book and Toltec Wisdom

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Why is this relevant to Steemit?

Well, just as the Toltecs wanted to create harmony in their communities, so too do we.

So let's break it down:

  • If we are impeccable with our word we will quickly gain respect within the community, leading to an increase in our number of followers. And they will be the kind of followers we enjoy interacting with.

  • If we don't take anything personally, those occasional negative comments will slide right past us like water off a duck's back. And we will still be in the perfect mood to create another awesome post!

  • If we don't make assumptions we will experience clear communication with those who interact with us.

  • If we always do our best, we will rise quickly to that Whale status we all dream about :)


Like I said, these four agreements have helped me no end in letting go of negative thoughts and the resulting negative events manifested by them.

Now, there are only 'events' because I make no judgement of them.

And in this manner I am living a wonderful life of joy!

In conclusion

If I am going to be completely honest and 'impeccable with my word' I have been struggling recently to see the perspective of my very pregnant partner who is currently on a hormone roller coaster ride accompanied by sleepless nights & the job of looking after Esteban while I do my work... and I consistently catch myself playing out the old knee-jerk programming in the way that I react to her energy or words. Which always leads to arguments.

And it is only when I don't react because I am not taking it personally, that the flow of good feelings can continue.

Luna is due in 2 weeks and will be born in Ubud, Bali.

I am no Buddha, but I am always improving and I will never give up trying. A good trick is to stick the agreements somewhere you can see them every day - IN LARGE WRITING :)

Once you have learned them, you can simply say them in your head when you feel one of 'those' moments coming on.

I'm not gonna lie to you and say it's easy. But I am going to say that it might very well be one of the most important steps in your life.

That's me and Sabrina, Russia 2014

If you are interested to read a bit more about the four agreements here is a good site for you:

Hope you enjoyed and learned from this post.

Love & Light to you all.

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Good principles to live by Sam!


They sure are. Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment :)

All the best!

Solid posting for the soul and the sustainably oriented individuals. thanks a bunch for sharing this crucial pieces of information and, especially for applying the concepts brought forth with the Four Agreements to Steemit! All for one and one for all!!! Namaste :)


Thank you for your kind words. It is I who should be thanking Source Energy for guiding me. I did not plan this post at all. In fact, I had a small argument with Sabrina and when I sat down to think about it, this article flowed forth from me. I barely even remember what I I was in a bit of a trance. A few hours ago Sabrina & I read through my words together and I feel sure it has helped us move forward in our relationship :) So, thank you Source for guiding me and yes yes yes - All for one and one for all! We are the New Age Musketeers! Namaste :)

Awesome post Sam! upped.


Many thanks. Appreciate the comment :)

Upvoted, known to me from before, I think i ran into those exact agreements a few years ago , but it relates here aswel as anywhere , thanks for sharing :)
Great finishing statements !

Welcome to my post , :) hope you enjoy it once again

Many breezeful days and good luck with the parenting that is serious ,I'm not going to rhyme when it comes to that :) , Do your Best :) !


Well you have your own life to take care of I cant expect you to look up everything after all , Water and Light , and the Love in between !


Many thanks for your lovely comment and great that you already knew of them. Sometimes it takes a second visit to really cement the words in the mind. I will check & upvote your post now.

Thanks again for taking the time to respond here :)

And just wanted to add that my experience of parenting has been quite unexpected. In fact, I have found myself becoming more like a child when I am with my baby. He has reminded me that life is about looking for fun things to do! Regardless of the consequences. Though my partner finds it harder to let go when she catches us rolling around in the mud together or painting on the walls :)

Abraham , I mean @samstonehill Love the 4 agreements specially the last one - it's true - our best changes and yes, just do our best - more - don't know about that .

The third one we say - when you assume you make an ass of U and me so just clarify what you are saying and kiss it - exactly no drama and please no "I'm a victim" mentality - fends me off


Thanks for taking the time to leave a lovely comment. Yes, I have to remind myself still that my best changes from time to time. I catch myself automatically feeling guilty sometimes if I don't feel like working, but this is usually due to tiredness and all I really need to do is sleep a little! Though having a baby around doesn't make that easy :)

All the best to you :)

@samstonehill epic post, pictures and message man


Thanks bro. The wonderful thing is that I do believe I can produce posts like this on a daily basis... if I only had the time! 10 days and counting before Luna arrives. She's been kicking a lot with this full moon. Excited to get out no doubt :)


@samstonehill WOW!! She's arriving all ready, so exciting man! Best wishes to all <3


Thanks bro. I am already living the wonderful feeling of having her with us now... after another simple birth. Only this one in the Spiritual centre of Bali, aside a jungle. As opposed to a back-ward thinking city in the South of France, in a clinic with rules similar to those of a prison! And when I see how wonderful Esteban is today I am filled with nothing but joy to imagine how beautiful Luna will be :) Together they will live a very special kind of life & help many people. Big love x

Amazing post friend


Thank you kindly :)

Superb post sam.Upvoted and following


Many thanks indeed. Enjoy the ride... plenty more where that came from :)


Many thanks Sam . Really appreciate your comments

very interesting your post@samstonehill


Glad you found it interesting. Hope it helps in some way :)

Great post @samstonehill! Resteemed! :)


Thanks friend. Much appreciated :)