The Spiritual Laws of Engagement - Part 1

in #spirituality3 years ago (edited)


This is one of the topics my spiritual teacher Matt Kahn loves to speak about. Some of the basic rules, how people behave and treat each other, as well as what happens in the background and on an energetic level. These are also rules, how you can engage in your daily life.
There is lots to say about each point, but I try to keep it as brief and clear as possible. Some of them may challenge old believes in you and may even trigger anger or other feelings. Invite them to be there, as we go along.
Always remember, that these teachings are for energetically sensitive souls a.k.a. Empaths - people, who have already come a long way on their spiritual journey and not for people, who have yet to discover, that there is something beyond their barriers of Ego.

1. You’ve done nothing wrong

There is a good reason, why this is rule no 1. We normally go through life with the conviction, that if things don’t go our way, it’s because we have done something wrong. This goes so far, that people start to believe, that it’s an important personality trait to assume, that we have done something wrong, as a motivation to become better in the future. This notion runs deep - especially as it is reinforced on a societal level - and also shows itself on spiritual paths. We start to believe, that we are not able to manifest the life of our dreams or that if we just meditated harder, we would become more enlightened. This culminates in the most paradox believe, that we have done something wrong, to not deserve Love or not being able to love enough. To make this perfectly clear: The feeling of having done something wrong, is only a reminder to love ourselves more and not a trigger, to invite more (self-)blame in our life.
If you become perfectly clear, that you have done nothing wrong, this ends the energy and feeling of blame. Nothing good has ever come out of blame and you most certainly don’t need blame to motivate you, to become a better version of yourself.
So let this really sink in: You have done nothing wrong!

2. Anyone who blames you, is unhappy.

If people blame you as the reason for their negative emotions, they are unhappy and behave like unhappy people do: in a totally unreasonable way.
So the next time, you meet someone behaving in a totally unreasonable manner and blame you as their reason for their negative emotion, just remind yourself, that you have done nothing wrong and the other person is simply unhappy. It’s not because of you, even if they tell you so.
Feel this. Let there be space in you for this realization.
Again: You are not the reason why the other person is unhappy.

3. Everyone else has done everything right.

It’s not only that you have done nothing wrong, but also no one else has done anything wrong either. So if another person feels unhappy, it’s also not because he has done something wrong. He simply feels unhappy.
The reason for the unhappiness is unknown. There is only one thing for sure: the reason is not you and not the other person.
Keep your attention on the word „because“. The moment you use the word „because“ you are going into the energy of blame. Where there is „because“, there is blame. Drop the „because“ and stay with whatever feeling is there.

4 In order to love, you don’t have to like

This is another misunderstanding, many people have. We think, that we can only love things, if we like them. That’s not true. Love is the state of consciousness, that lets everything in you the space to be as it is.
So if there is some pain inside of you, of course you don’t like this. No one likes to be in pain. Don’t try to like things, that are unlikeable!
To love them, is to grant them the right to be there. To Love also means, to give yourself the permission to not like something. That’s a very important point.

5. When you know who you are, nothing can get you

This is another very deep piece of spiritual knowledge and for some, this is even a spiritual path on its own. Everything that can be threatened in you, and that can be taken away from you, is not what you truly are.
Your true beingness is something, no one can take away from you.
So if you feel threatened that something or someone is about to get you, they can’t take away what you truly are and only what you believe you are - which makes it even a good thing, if this image of yourself is being destroyed by someone. This changes the perception of an attacker into one of a helper to remove a role you were playing that so obviously is not you, as it is being shattered into pieces. Know who you are, and nothing can get you.

These concludes the first five of the laws of engagement.
As said before, there could be said a lot more about them and I may do so in later articles. For now, just try to take them in and let them do their job.
It’s universal intelligence - so just trust it.

If you liked this article, please comment and resteem.
If you do both, I try to reward everyone who shares my articles with at least an 50% upvote.
Blessings and see you in Part 2 of this series!


I'm happy to hear that Matt Kahn is your teacher. I love his videos and have gone to see him a couple times for evening teachings. The energy that comes out in me in his presence is so light-hearted and playful that I know something very true is having its flames fanned.

This is another great article from you. I will resteem it, and you know, while I'm quite new here on Steemit, I have a pretty large group of spiritually conscious folks on FB and I'm planning on getting as many of them into Steemit as I can convince to give it a try. As part of that I intend to give them a few great Steemers to follow to get their feed started, and you are definitely going at the top of the list, my friend.

This is already a long comment, but I simply must tell you one of the key things I got from reading your post....

I realized that as far as I seem to have come with my spiritual progress in so many ways, this blame thing still has a hold on me. I blame myself and I blame others.

That feeling that I haven't done enough, that I missed a step, that I'm not where I should be because, because, because... I can see it, but can't quite shake it. I constantly work on accepting the perfection of what is an abandoning the hope of things being different so that it can all be okay to me. I make progress, then I see the same old patterns again.

The same with blaming others. If you met me, you would think I was the most supportive person you've ever known. And I am really supportive of people. I take delight in the well-being of others. But I also suspect fault in others when things are not what I want them to be.

I see this even in a simple thing like playing an online card game against robot opponents. I get so mad at some of those robots! Every trick my team loses, I'm looking to see what my robot partner did wrong.

Now if you play with me in person, I keep that under wraps. I keep it so suppressed that I don't even know I'm doing it, let alone my partner (though there usually is a tension in my gut that probably traces to that suppression). But with the robots, I guess my identity as "good" doesn't feel it needs maintenance, so I unleash my blaming tendencies on those poor little robots, which means on myself, since I'm the one suffering from it. (Though to be fair, chicken and mouse are particularly horrid partners with a tendency to sometimes throw away an Ace of spades for no good reason.)

It is so important that we keep these insights about ourselves available to our conscious minds. That way when we are doing it we can catch ourselves doing it and make a different choice. Otherwise, there is the part of us that knows this does us no good. And there is the other part that keeps doing it anyway.

Thanks again for this article. I have to give it more thought, and see what progress I can make out of applying it.

Again your comment has opened my heart even more and I can't thank you enough! ❤️
I'm a little bit speechless to be honest... Your compassion even reaches the souls of these little robots and let me express my deepest gratitude for that, since they are not able to do so. 😀In what you are writing, even this blame, that is so natural and human, has a sweetness. Yes, I know this place you are talking about... especially as Empaths we have this feeling of having not done enough or we blame ourselves for thoughts of mischief and for looking for faults in others. The good thing though is, that these thoughts won't harm anyone. Chicken and Mouse will throw away this damn Ace of Spades even if you think that they are the worst bot players in the history of mankind... botkind... 😀
You know, freedom means to be free to even think, that they should burn in bot-hell!
I would recommend to allow yourself these thoughts and feelings and since they are already here anyway, they are next in line to be loved. ❤️
No need to blame yourself for blaming others or yourself - the invitation is to "love whatever arises" - and if it's blame, then this is perfectly ok.
So good, that you are also in resonance with Matt! It shouldn't come as a surprise, since we connected instantly here, to bring forth the Love Revolution on Steemit! 😀
I had many teachers over the years - many wise and enlightened beings, but Matt really changed everything for me. Not always in ways that I liked. My partner left me, because she couldn't stand the Love and wanted her old life back - now living with several partners in what she calls a "polyamorous relationship", which have nothing to do with "amour"/love at all... Long story... but so much pain involved...
And you know what? Even in the deepest despair and blaming life for what it has done to me in exchange for opening my heart, I still shout out to the world: I dare to Love!!
Yes... sometimes I feel like a lonesome warrior of Love, but then, there are these moments... moments like this... were I have the opportunity to meet fellow warriors like you, when everything suddenly makes sense....
Thank you! Thank you for wanting to recommend me to your friends and leading the Love Revolution on step further - one breath, one heartbeat and one I love you at a time....
Thank you! I deeply bow in front of you and your brave soul. Thank you, for speaking your truth and sharing it with us. Thank you, for making this stay here a piece of heaven. 🙏
If you need any help or have questions about the platform - and maybe having read some of the confusing stuff about how this all works - please feel free to ask anytime.
This is the Steemit Love Revolution and you have just joined this force, that can't be stopped! Thank you and I love you! ❤️

Okay, have to update you now that I'm back from a Buddhist New Year's celebration at which I was the sort of emcee (technically umzed).

I really had our above conversation on my mind, your original post and our dialog afterward. I was keenly aware of how judgmental I was being toward myself, because I was nervous being on the stage and all mic'd up and being recorded for worldwide broadcast for such an important event.

I meditated on these ideas over and over throughout any portion where I didn't have to speak, saying to myself: "You are doing it perfectly. Your natural state is perfect joy. Nothing has gone wrong. There is no reason to blame yourself. There is no reason to blame anyone out there. They are all participating perfectly. Everything is as it should be. Just allow who you are to naturally shine. You can't get it wrong. Even if you blame yourself, that is perfectly all right too." And so on.

There actually were a few snafus here and there. No one gave me the announcement about the celebratory meal afterwards, so I had to wing it. I lost count during the chanting so didn't know when to ring the bell, and was afraid someone else had kept proper count so knew I was wrong (as if they ever would). Then at the break I again forgot to keep track of time. I was so engrossed in chatting with friends, then mid-sentence yelled out, "Oh crap! I forgot to keep the time" which made the section of the room nearest me immediately go silent, while I scurried to go find the bell to ring and draw everyone back from the break.

Thankfully, all the repeating of the above reminders caused me to laugh at my missteps instead of feeling anger or shame. I really had to suppress my laughter while the chanting went on, then just rang the gong when it seemed about right. LOL

Even when the teacher appeared to go up from his private room to give the teaching after the break, and noting how late it was I rang the bell to reconvene everyone he whispered to me, "Isn't there supposed to be a teaching today?" Without missing a step or feeling any self-condemnation, I replied, "Yes, and YOU'RE the one giving it!" To which he replied with laughter himself.

Then, cherry on top, afterward a number of people came up to me to tell me how much they enjoyed watching me during the ceremony because I was such a clear embodiment of the joy the teacher was talking about. Little did they know it was because I was just reminding myself again and again that my nature was joy, and praying that nothing obscure that. Between that and trying to simply do all the steps for my role at the right time and in the right away, there just wasn't any room left for ego mind busyness.

Then even the teacher came up to me to thank me for leading the service and asking me to please do it more often. And then two of the people who had been expressing appreciation to me began telling the teacher the same things about me! I had to run away at that point. LOL

Anyway, thought you might enjoy hearing about the continuing evolution of our little convo here. Blessings.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful story! ❤️
Wabi-Sabi is the Japanese art of seeing the perfection in the imperfect. We all need more wabi-sabi. 😀...and everything works out in the end perfectly.
It seems as if you had to remember a lot of things there. I will post a video from Matt later together with some of my observations regarding that topic. Thank you!

You're amazing!

Hi! I don't have a lot of followers on facebook, but I post my articles in facebook groups, and I've started adding a little piece about Steemit at the end of them. It would be nice to get more of the spiritual community over here. Going to check out your profile now!

Yes, let's bring more spiritual community to Steemit! It has so much potential to be such a positive force in so many people's lives! But I'm still learning so much, so am waiting until I can be a bit better guide than I could now. In a couple weeks I think I'll be ready to start encouraging folks to join and helping to show them the ropes. It looks like you may be experienced enough now though.

Meh, well, Steemit is extremely complicated. I can show people the bare minimum, but when it comes to the bots and all the economics.....???

I've been thinking about putting together a spiritual team here on Steemit. Maybe we can combine forces since you have a large facebook following. I've been wanting to put together a discord group and writing contests, etc to get the spiritual community more united and stronger here.

Yeah, I'm definitely very much figuring out the finances aspect of this platform too. I do seem to learn more each day, so that's something LOL.

I'd love for us both to really bring in more spiritual folks, but I don't have bandwidth for creating groups or contests. It's all I can do to just talk about it to my existing groups, as I run 3. I'll be doing an intro FB Live on it to one of my groups a week from today, and definitely sharing with them a lot of links to resources instead of my trying to be the resource!

Well let's combine forces. What are your facebook groups? I wrote a post yesterday to brainstorm how to get this all together.

I replied further on your new post. Great idea and thanks for the initiative.

You and I both share a love for Matt Kahn! His teachings are so unique, and sometimes the truth of them washes over you like nothing else. I quote him often in my writing here on Steemit. You are the spirit guide of your body is one that profoundly impacted me, and one about the inner child did also.

I love the way you described number four!

I also love the way you introduce the article as being for people who see beyond ego. There are some concepts that people who haven't reached a certain point are not ready for and cannot understand. I've written quite a bit about unconditional love and toxic people and boundaries and what that all means, and there are a lot of people who can't understand that.


When I first listened to Matt 3-4 years ago, I found him totally arrogant and couldn't listen to his talks. I thought: "Who does this guy think he is? Jesus?" and it took me quite some time to let him in (and realize, that he really is Jesus lol).
I was coming from an Advaita Vedanta tradition and his teaching where threatening my spiritual ego and shattering it into pieces over time.
These days, Matts audios and videos (in the meantime I own them all lol) have become my only spiritual practice. I sit at least 2 hours per day with them and let them do their job. It changed everything and there is no end in the revelations. Some teachings are complete by their own. I sometimes think, that just listening and integrating only one part of a teaching would be enough for one lifetime. 😀
The interesting thing is, that I have become like an ambassador for his teachings. Every person I introduced to his teachings has experienced the same remarkable transformations in their life and it goes on and on...
If you spend so much time with someone, your energies begin to match in a way. I also go to work with him and we talk a lot 😀
Great to find more participants on the path of the Love Revolution here! Thanks for getting in touch and for your resteem! ❤️

I can totally identify with your initial reaction. I actually still get that at the beginning of most of his youtube videos and it takes some time for it to sink in on another level. I don't know, there may be something about his personality that I don't really like. But that in itself is a great learning experience.

"Who the fuck does this guy think he is?" is the first thing that came to my mind when I first listened to Dr. Hawkins about the levels of consciousness. I was like who the fuck does this guy think he is to assign levels of consciousness to something. But turns out I just wasn't ready for it for the very reason he describes in teaching the levels of consciousness lol. Something sounds like absolute gobbledy gook when you hear it if you're not ready for it. Flatout dumb, actually. But then when you are a vibrational match, and you are ready for it kapow it's life changing!

I am with Abraham-Hicks like you are with Matt Kahn. I can't get enough. I just inundate my consciousness with it.

Seems like blame has a lot to answer for! I'm going to digest this fully and looking forward to reading more.

In particular, I like point 2. One of the points a lot of people I support need help with is realising that NO-ONE can make them feel anything. How they feel is down to them.

Sharing for others as well.

Thank you - also for the resteem!

Another great post, I really needed to see this one today! It’s so easy to forget and get caught up in blaming others or ourselves. Can’t wait to see part 2!

You explain the principles well ~ thanks.

I am personally coming to the realisation that spirituality is an over-complicated beast.

Too much thinking, once the basics are grasped, can lead to confusion.

I am leaning towards letting go, acceptance, non judgement, simplicity and love more and more these days and am working towards promoting this with my work here on Steemit.

Be well.


That's beautifully said... I guess, the reason why it's sometimes complicated is, because people try to walk on a path, that is not meant for them.
I will address this issue in a later article. Thanks!

That and the fact that there is an element of emperors clothes shrouding the whole subject I reckon.

I wrote a piece recently here about my thoughts on all this and I would welcome your comment...

Ultimately we are meant to accept ambiguity with regards to the bigger issues and just be the best version of ourselves.

Be well.


Fully accepting yourself and everyone around you, not blaming, loving every living creature without searching for a reason or as you wrote, without having to like them - this is all we need. More people need to read and accept this. Thank you :)

Yes, and let us start with accepting the fact, that people are often not able to accept - so let us begin with accepting our inability to accept ❤️

Thank you. I needed that. :)

You are welcome! Blessings! ❤️

In life, we have to love ourselves before we can reprocate that love to others.
Those five rules say same.
I needed this.

Thank you! Much Love! ❤️

Upvote and resteem ! all of your upvotes to @solarcoach will be recycled in solar energy.

This post has received gratitude of 4.81 % from @appreciator thanks to: @atmosblack, @atmosblack.

This post has received a 8.46 % upvote from @boomerang thanks to: @atmosblack

You got a 22.22% upvote from @ipromote courtesy of @atmosblack!
If you believe this post is spam or abuse, please report it to our Discord #abuse channel.

If you want to support our Curation Digest or our Spam & Abuse prevention efforts, please vote @themarkymark as witness.

You got a 3.32% upvote from @upmyvote courtesy of @atmosblack!
If you believe this post is spam or abuse, please report it to our Discord #abuse channel.

If you want to support our Curation Digest or our Spam & Abuse prevention efforts, please vote @themarkymark as witness.

You got a 1.36% upvote from @postpromoter courtesy of @atmosblack!

Want to promote your posts too? Check out the Steem Bot Tracker website for more info. If you would like to support the development of @postpromoter and the bot tracker please vote for @yabapmatt for witness!

You got a 16.91% upvote from @allaz courtesy of @atmosblack!

Your post is all world best sir.please tech me sir.I am waiting your next post.Thank you.