Rock and Roll Saved the World

As we go through our lives, there are inevitably challenges that feel intense and overbearing. Sometimes there are situations where there appears to be no realistic solution that everyone can live with, at least not from the place you are standing. Sometimes even our best efforts still end in a moment where it feels like you can't breathe.

How do you deal with these moments? What is your preferred method of action to stay centered and ensure that you do not inadvertently become a contributor to the collateral damage of the main challenge?

A big part of my personal journey has been not only accepting the fact that 'coping mechanisms' are real and unavoidable, but also being willing to be an active participant in creating and choosing healthy coping mechanisms, rather than destructive ones.

In honor of the sacred healing that was a part of the creation of the fire circle, I brought my abalone shell down to burn some sage while we were working on the campground. It was a nice touch to the reflections that I felt as we shared our space, our vision, our creation, with a friend!

Recently I had one of those overbearing days, where it seemed perfectly reasonable to scream at the sky and break everything in sight. Since this is not a blog and I am not here to talk about my specific personal issues, let me just say that the challenges of that day were the type of thing that tears at your heart and soul while you are dealing with it. I am pretty drama-free and generally don't get riled unless there is harm to someone involved, just for a little perspective on me. But that's not really relevant at the moment ~ we are here to discuss the lesson of how to deal with those moments where things seem tough to work through to a place of inner peace, regardless of details.

When we made it back to the homestead from our harrowing experience that Saturday afternoon, I knew I needed an outlet. At 42 years old I have gotten pretty well-versed at not allowing anger or negative emotions to overcome my world. However, in that moment I knew if I didn't find something to do I would make decisions not so easy to live with.

I know I am not alone in finding solace in my little homestead, my little piece of earth (and heaven). If I stay busy, I can find a way to keep from focusing on whatever the "heavy" is. While a walk in the woods is always calming for me (I call nature my temple), I knew I needed more than that to bring me back to myself.

The next thing I knew, I was in the area next to the creek where I want to build a campground. There's a nice flat spot that's easily 12 feet wide and 75-100 feet long along the water, it's just high enough above the bank I have never seen it flood, and it's perfect for a couple of tent platforms and hammock camps. We've been talking about it, but we also have a lot of projects on the 10 year list and this one is a desire, not so much an immediate need.

Sometimes the best solutions are the simplest ones! I decided the moment was just right for creating a creekside fire circle. I began taking my time looking closely on the hillside and in the area for larger rocks that would work for such a purpose. You can't use rocks out of the water in or near fire, or they will explode as the moisture tries to escape. However, here in our mountains we have no shortage of rocks in and on the earth as well as in the creeks.

Only two of the rocks I chose to use for the circle were small enough I could actually pick them up and carry them. Each find was a painstaking process to roll it all the way to the spot for the circle. There was also an added challenge of not breaking the water line that runs in that area from where we have a spring tapped and the water moving elsewhere!

Building the fire circle took a while. The methodical process of building it was enough to keep me focused, and then I was able to spend another hour working to build a fire in the circle once it was completed. Pretty much everything was wet from rain is why it took so long. Of course, the house would have been an easy place to get dry kindling, but I had consciously kept myself down here to process emotions. Going back to the house would mean resuming my duties as Mom, and I wasn't yet in shape for that step.

I sat at that fire for hours, watching the flames and feeding more sticks to the fire until long after dark. But I didn't hop in my truck and go anywhere, I didn't drown my sorrows in whiskey, and the only decision I made that I have to live with is where the campground fire circle is located. I was able to stare into the fire, listen to the rushing of the creek just a few feet away, and finally enjoy a respite (without having to be completely busy) from the runaway trains of stress, anger, worry, etc that had been attempting to overtake my every waking moment.

Through many years of trial and error, I have found that my best "coping mechanism" is one that has me being productive. I have done everything from working with non-profits, to raising money for charity, to gardening, to massive art projects, to songwriting or poetry writing and so much more ~ all in the name of finding inner peace. Sitting still during turmoil isn't something I can do, but sometimes working on a solution for the turmoil isn't possible either. It's in these times that I turn that energy towards something that CAN be done, with real results I can see.

I had my partner and a friend come down yesterday and help me clear some more space for the campground, and while we were down there I decided I would get some photos of the fire circle and turn it into a post on here (I definitely didn't get any photos while I was building or burning that first time!). We clear everything by hand (for much of it I literally use hand clippers), so as to disturb as little as possible. Perhaps I will make a future post about tree transplanting, as we have a few small trees on the property that need to move, such as 2 hemlocks in the area we cleared yesterday.

It was also really nice to share some smoke and a bottle of hard cider while we worked. We even had some left when we were done for the afternoon!

Thanks for reading!