Coffee Time Meditation #43 -- Adding Value to Your Life
Thoughts on Today’s Quote
I tend to be a pretty independent person. Rarely ask for anything from other people. There is a streak in me that tells me asking for help is losing my independence. I also have a tendency to be pretty private about my life. That works when life is pretty normal. Then the abnormal happens and that independence gets challenged, even stomped on.
Last year around this time I became very ill and ended up hospitalized. For a time afterward I was very weak and lacked the stamina I needed for even small chores. Followup appointments to the hospital meant getting someone to drive me and a wheelchair to get in and out of the hospital.
Thankfully, two couples from the branch stepped up and stepped past my first instinct which is, I can do it. One couple saw to my house and my cats while I was in hospital. The other couple looked after getting me to medical appointments and when I’d let them, picking up groceries I needed.
Yet another friend got tired of me declining help with meals. She left a bag with some frozen prepared dinners she had made on my door and texted me to go get them. I had to laugh at her method and then be grateful for her determined kindness.
In the process of that experience, I started to learn that I had over the years found a tribe around me. I just didn’t realize it. The number of people who made it known to me they would like to help if I’d let them was humbling. The number of times I heard “well, you are so private, I wasn’t sure how to offer” blew me away.
Three of those people regularly touch base with me to make sure I’m okay. They respect my privacy but make it clear they are checking in. A year ago, I would have likely found that irritating. Now, I know it comes from a place of honest caring and I accept it for what it is meant to be. I’m also grateful. Their continued contact even if I get busy and am not in touch tells me they were dead serious about their caring.
The experience taught me that by being myself I had indeed surrounded myself with people who I valued and they in turn valued me. I can still be independent, even my private self, most of the time. When I need to accept help, I can call on those valued people to help me leave my personal island and do what I need to do. Just as I would and, at times, have done for others.
Many of those people over the years have challenged me to be better than I am. Not directly through conversation but through the respect I hold for them and the desire to emulate them. Little did they maybe realize that their comments to me while recovering from my illness challenged me again to find the balance between the private, fiercely independent self I am and the willingness to let others in when needed.
Look around you. You may have more of a tribe than you ever knew. Do you value people for the part they play in your tribe? Or do they go unnoticed and unappreciated?
About Coffee Time Meditation
I love being inspired by other people’s quotes. I thought I’d start sharing some quotes that inspire me along with my own thoughts the quote evokes within me. So, think of someone, like me, sitting quietly with the first fresh coffee of the day and mediating about the words of the quote. That would be me, or it could be you.
I invite you to share your own thoughts on the quote in the comments.
If you like this series, please upvote it and share with others.
Have a great day
Path to Success
Past Coffee Time Meditations
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Until we meet again …
This is a great post and a very touching quote! Thank you for sharing this with the community!
So true about keeping good company. I’m glad you have a great tribe around to help you in need.
I think if your a good person and a good friend to those you choose to have around you, you develop true friends and that becomes apparent when you come into a time of need, even if you think you can manage without help they know better than you sometimes
I glad you had good people around you when you needed it
That is such a great quote. I don't have a very big circle of close family and friends but it doesn't bother me as I know I've got a great tribe around me. Happy to hear that you do too. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and for reminding me to appreciate my tribe
vibe tribe
I relate to a lot of this personally
am trying to get a cat off the keyboard to write this :) (the Norwegian O.o)
<3
b.a.
I can so relate to this
Fortunately (or unfortunately?) unlike you I've hardly been challenged to leave this comfort zone of absolute independence... and that's maybe where things become a bit unfortunate for me... I really have trouble feeling part of a tribe and that's a very damning feeling sometimes!
Being able to survive alone does not mean we have to. Just being able to is enough. I am both glad that you are independent and that you have such great people around you. 💚
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Life is about giving and receiving. ‘Find a tribe and love them hard’ - this is my quote. Let them in, and give back. 😊