What makes a good parent?

It's has been more than a month since my last post on this topic, it was actually on the 8^th February, so it's about time that I did a new post again. It's a good thing I had an interesting period behind me to reflect on.

Selfcontrol/Stresscontrol

Admit it, doesn’t it annoy you when you see those pictures on Instagram or Facebook of people showing off their ‘perfect lives’ where they all smile and do stuff together? But no-one ever posts the pictures/videos where their child is throwing up a tantrum, walks away when you call them, grabs something in the supermarket and doesn’t put it back when you ask them to or draws on the walls.

_{Not everyone has nannies helping and looking after their babies so that we only have the good times with our children (image from Google Images 'Perfect Family')}

Anyone who is a parent will share my thoughts, those images only show you a ‘perfect life’, they almost make you jealous and question your own ability as a parent, but who knows what goes on behind the scenes. How many hours you have to put in being stern and strict, educating your children, arguing with one another about not standing by each others’ decisions, all that remains a hidden from us.

Ok … no one stands there taking pictures or videos when their children are misbehaving or when you’re having an argument and if you do have these, would you really want the outside world to see that? I have to admit, I sometimes have trouble controlling my voice when I argue with my wife, especially when she either doesn’t get my point or when she doesn’t let me finish making it. IF there are images of that I certainly don’t want the outside world to see that, that’s for sure.

What I want to say with this post is, we all have these situations and the more we talk about them, the less they’ll occur. Communication is key and that way we will also control the way we treat each other and that has a knock on effect on how we raise and educate our children. Parenting takes time and effort … and most of all patience.

One thing we sometimes forget is that we also need to appreciate each other, spend time with one another, do something together, that’s also the best stress relief.

This is a lesson I’ve had to remind myself of a lot recently. Over the past weeks I’ve shared several negative things in my life. I was actually doing the opposite of what those ‘perfect parents’ on Instagram & Facebook are doing. I had a lot of stress, we were all ill in turns, the children had their own challenges to learn to deal with. If you need a reminder of what I’m talking about, here are a few recent posts where I talk about those situations:

This was my review on last week
Juggling 2 jobs and picking up the kids
Stress around the election result with regards to my wife's job
The whole family is ill whilst we travelled to the Netherlands

Last weekend we made sure that we spent some quality time with one another, to overcome all those negative things that we’ve had in our lives the past month and a half; and show each other that we appreciate being around each other.

Saturday

On Saturday morning we went out together for a walk along the river near where we live. Although the little one was protesting having to walk he did well and once we were feeding the ducks he was alright again. Afterwards we visited a little market in Bremgarten and got ourselves some nice groceries for lunch and coffee in the afternoon.

Who knows where Easter-bunnies come from?

Switzerland off course -> Lindt & Sprüngli to be precise 😄

_Heaven

Last weekend there was an event at the Lindt & Sprüngli Flagshipstore/Factory in Kilchberg, they had made an ‘Eastervillage’. Kids could have their faces painted, decorate chocolate bunnies, take pictures and off course you can buy their fantastic chocolates there. We decided to go there on Sunday morning and the kids had a fantastic time, they drew easter bunnies, had their faces painted like bunnies with matching ears and my daughter decorated a chocolate easter bunny.

So for all you parents out there, I hope that I’m helping you see that you’re not inadecuate as a parent, we all face these struggles. The most important thing is to stick together as parents, back each other up, support one another, especially if one of you is under more stress than the other.

I'm going to finish this post with some pictures I took from last Sunday. Please remember, it's not always this nice 😉

Thank you

I hope you considered this post useful and interesting. Feel free to share your experiences with me either below or privately on discord (wolfje#6587). If you want to read my previous posts on What makes a good parent?', here are the links:

1. What is a sign that you're doing it well?
2. Jealousy
3. How do I discipline my child?

Doron