I think many of us involved in love and hate relationship with our parents. I understand that parents can be nosey, overprotective, neglectful, intrusive, loving, caring and even cosseting. Despite those qualities they posses, one thing I know, they only want the best for their children. Nevertheless, often as a child we tend to forget appreciating their actions and efforts they made in order to raise us.

There are some children who are nurtured and raised by someone who are not biologically related to them. But that doesn't mean to make them any less parents.And I think, this is the current realization I began to embrace.

Historically, adoption has been practiced for years and it is even documented in Codex Justinianus. There are two types of adoption, open and closed adoption, each of them have their pros and cons. However, speaking based on my experience, I strongly support open adoption where the child knows since early age they are adopted. The open adoption allows the child to communicate freely with their biological parents and still posses unaltered birth certificate, which means the biological parents still legally responsible for the child. Also the child is aware that they are adopted and know their natural family.Meanwhile, closed adoption comes with altered birth certificate and often creating a new identity of a child. From what I experienced, the adoptee tend to feel different from their environment. Often they ask question such as " why do I look different?" " why do people tell me that I don't even look like you?" " aren't you my parents? I should look like you right?". Then, later as they grow up and find out they are adopted, they undergo identity-crisis. Some of them felt their life was a beautifully crafted lie. However, only later they realize,being adopted was the best for them.

Picture courtesy pixabay

I once encountered with a man in his thirty and we conversed about emerging married young couple. He told me that being parents are more than just giving a birth and sending the child to school but also transmitting knowledge and life values. I like his idea about parents since that time I was seeking the answer to my very question, " who are parents?".

My adoption story was quite dramatic. I went to all sorts of denial. I began to look the people who raised me as a liar. I was confused how to refer them, mama and papa didn't even sound right anymore. If you have been following me, I think I tend to refer them as amom and adad. It was as if they were meaningless. Only later, as I started to mingle with my natural family, I realized being adopted was a life and game changer. Nevertheless, I still have weird feelings about all of its complication.

" Who are there during my hardship?", " Who are willing to give me their world?" "Who are willing to go back and forth from heaven to hell only for me?" it's always them, my mama and papa. They grant me access to freedom, to experience life in all sorts of ways; the good and bad. They watch me made reckless decision but they make sure to help even when I didn't cry for it. The only people I can count on entirely.

I regretted for speaking ill about them just because I was surrounded by toxic people. I think I am not going to be confused anymore, they are my parents for better or worse. They have beautifully transmitted their knowledge and values to me. They have made me the person I am today. They created a safe haven for me. They allowed me to venture, out in the world without even excessively worried. They taught me how to survive on the road, how to talk to human being from all sorts of social ladder. They taught me about life in the most unimaginable ways. They are the reason I am still here today.

Finally, I am glad and grateful I was adopted.

On a final note, parents are human, we can't expect them to be perfect neither can you be perfect. They make mistakes and so are you. It's okay to be mad at them but try to ask yourself a question, " who are willing to give you their world?". If you don't appreciate your parents, try to go out in wilderness, try to live without them, try to talk to people who do not have parents, try to see if you can survive without them, try all sorts of things that detach you from parents. I did it all and I know, I still need them. How about you?

Are you an adoptee? or know someone who was adopted? tell me your experience!

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I was tagged by @mrprofessor to:
Write a post about something you have to be positive about today - this could be anything from being thankful for your current situation, someone being nice to you, being thankful for your friends and family, or even being thankful for the opportunity you have been given here on Steemit - just keep it positive :)

• Do this for 7 days in a row if you get nominated.
• Mention three people who should do this on each day.
• Tag it with #7daypositivitychallenge and include these rules at the bottom of your post Include a picture of something positive (related to your story if possible.)
• Tip: You need to put the # in front of 7daypositivitychallenge or it will not let you use the tag.
  

Check out the original challenge by @conradt 7 day positivity challenge day 7 - Your Body is a temple

More about my adventures and misadventures

Cease The Multitasking Devil

7 Day Positivity Challenge | Day 2| I am grateful for friendship I bond
7 Day Positivity Challenge | Day 1 | I am grateful for my past and my reality
Nocturnal Habit Singapore Days
Overcoming Travel Fears and Make Your Trip More Enjoyable

Pre-Travel Anxiety | My little tips dealing with anxiety monster.