Filipino Jokes Translated for Western Tastes Part 12
Hello, my fellow Steemers! This is the 12th part of my series post about Filipino jokes which I have translated for Western audiences. Please check out Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, 9, 10, and 11. Please read and pick the one you like the most. Tell me in the comments section on why you liked it.
There are still a lot more funny jokes that need translating. These jokes are the products of the Filipinos' creativity, ingenuity, and love of social drinking.
So please read and enjoy!
Boasting about Sons
Three old men were drinking liquor and boasting about each of their own sons.
1ST OLD MAN: My Junior studied abroad by his own effort to become a lawyer. He now has his own law firm in New York. He's rich now that he even gave a late model Mercedes Benz car to his close friend!
2ND OLD MAN: New York? My son also settled there after graduating from Yale. He now owns several businesses. He's so damn rich that he could afford to give an apartment in Manhattan to his close friend!
3RD OLD MAN: My friends, you are blessed with fine sons! Heaven has cursed poor me with only a gay son! Well, at least that gay son of mine went abroad after being kicked out of our house!
1ST OLD MAN AND 2ND OLD MAN: What happened to him???
3RD OLD MAN: Oh, the last time I got a call from him, he's driving his own Mercedes Benz car and living in an apartment in Manhattan given by his 2 gay rich boy lovers who call him a close friend!
Pissing Contest
There was a world pissing contest held in a stadium about who can urinate the most. 3 men, each from a different country, were the finalists.
MR. JAPAN went first and urinated till an empty barrel of oil was full. The audience clapped!
MR. AMERICA came next and urinated into an empty swimming pool until it was full. The audience cheered!
Finally, MR. PHILIPPINES closed his eyes while urinating next...He opened his eyes a minute later and shockingly found out that the audience had drowned in his own urine!
Substitute...
INVESTIGATOR: So what do you do for a living?
GIRL: I'm a substitute!
INVESTIGATOR: You mean a "prostitute"?
GIRL: No, Sir! My mom is a prostitute. And when she gets sick, I am her substitute!
Caught Cheating
John was caught cheating in an exam.
TEACHER: AHA! What is this tiny piece of paper in your hand?
JOHN: Those are my prayers for this exam, Ma'am!
TEACHER: And why are the answers written there?!?
JOHN: Oh, my prayers have been answered!
No answers
PETER: How's the assignment?
RICHARD: Bad! I can't answer anything! I passed the blank paper without any answers!
PETER: Me too! What do we do now? They'll think we copied from each other!
Translated from Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWnQxFnDi1s
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I grew up with these jokes yet I still smile when I read them. Good job with the translation. 😁
There are plenty more but mostly green. I would like to post them as NSFW but they might be offensive to some.
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