WHY CHILDREN ARE LIKE PITBULLS - PART 2

in #family8 years ago

If you read Why Children are Like Pitbulls - Part 1 you'll already know the role that training plays when it comes to children, or Pitbulls for that matter. Usually, training is based upon a presupposition though. It is the view of the child or dog that the parent or owner already has that comes out in the training, or lack of training.

If a man purchases a Pitbull and believes that they are fighting dogs and good dogs to use as an attack animal, this belief will be manifested in the training that the owner gives the dog. If the owner believes that Pitbulls are just like any other dog can be trained to properly behave, then that goal will also be evident from the training process.

Likewise, there are two main views about children.

  • BLESSING

  • CURSE

We will start with the latter view, because it is getting all the more common these days.

CURSE

Many people these days see children as a curse. The reasons will vary, but here are some of them.

  • Cost too much
  • Loss or personal freedom
  • Long-term responsibility
  • A lot to deal with

To be sure, all of these statements could be true and contain some level of validity. However, when a child is born and the parents view that child as a burden or a curse, that belief is manifested in the way that the parents raise that child.

Please do not get me wrong. Raising children can be a long-term, full-time job full of hard work, but that doesn't mean that we should treat the children like they are the problem. No, if anything, it is the adult with the improper attitude that has the problem, and the problem is not the child.

Far too often I can see the frustrated parents talking to their children in inappropriate tones with words that are even more than inappropriate. Image how that child will feel after hearing a decade of that language directed at them. Eventually, the mindset of the parent becomes a 'self-fulfilling prophecy."


The parent believes that their children are a curse, so they treat them like they are a curse until the become a curse.

It's just like a Pitbull owner believing that their dog is a mean dog so they treat it like it is a mean dog until it becomes a mean dog.

And in the end, they both say, "See, I told you so. I was right about that!"


Yeah, incredible, isn't it?

Then that child can grow up and be a curse to their parents, a curse to themselves, and a curse to the rest of the world.

BLESSING

As a man who already has four children with a fifth one on the way, you can probably guess what viewpoint I take on children. I believe that they are each a blessing. Yeah, they have a sinful and selfish nature, and things are not always easy, but that does not mean that they are not a blessing.

Neither @papa-pepper nor mama-pepper would "send any of our children back." They are each amazing little individuals, and we love each of them dearly. Even our one year old little girl has already proven herself to be a giant blessing to our family. When another child asks mama-pepper for something, often the littlest girl will arise and grab it for them before mama-pepper even finishes what she was working on.

These little ones of ours are very helpful, grateful, obedient, kind, and generous. If we had spent the past six years treating them as if they were little curses that we had to deal with, we may not have had the same results.

Basically, a child is a precious thing. They are beautiful little people that need care, love, guidance, affection, tenderness, and even forgiveness. We are to model appropriate behavior and instruct our children on how to best follow our example. The investment of time up front during the little years can pay off big-time in the long run. Too often I see parents who have let a child live too disobediently for too long. The parent has now been getting more and more frustrated for years, and the damage has already been done, to both the child, the parent, and their relationship.

Our little boy is learning how not to steal and lie right now. We never taught him how, that came out on its own. Now though, as the parents, we have to teach this little guy how to choose not to give in to such temptations, or he'll grow up to be a curse instead of a blessing.

This is where being proactive comes in. I could just believe that our son will do fine on his own and not take the time to train him not to lie or steal. However, I know that if he gets in those habits now, it will be hard for him to give them up later. I used to lie and steal a lot, long into my adult life. If he can learn to make better choices now when it comes to those things, it will help him out a lot in the long run.

CONCLUSION

Parents have a choice to make in the way that they teach and train their children. However, the underlying beliefs of the parents about that child will most likely be evident in the way that the parents teach and train their children. I choose to believe that my children are blessings and not curses, and I will therefore raise them as such. It may be a view that is losing popularity these days, but it doesn't mean that the truth about the matter has changed. It only means that others are choosing to believe something else.

As I shared last time, the way that children and pitbulls are either trained or not trained can make a world of difference in how they behave when they grow older. The underlying belief of the parent or owner will be what influences the training.


As always, I'm @papa-pepper, and here's the proof:


proof-of-four-little-blessings




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You have a beautiful family. How on Earth do you find time for Steemit? I struggle to make time and I only have two kiddos. Each person's situation is different, I realize.

I am struggling with how to raise my boys and set the best example for them, because the Lord knows I am far from perfect. Our pastor encourages us by saying the BEST parenting technique is to pray for our children. And I agree. God can do so much more for them than me and their mother alone. That doesn't mean that parenting responsibilities end there. We must still guide them by love, kindness, and good example.

A good passage is Psalm 127:4-5

Like arrows in the hand of a man of war, are the children of the young.
Happy is the man who has a good store of them.

Yeah, that is a good Psalm. That's why I don't mind having more than one to two children. If they are like arrows in the hand of a warrior, how many arrows would you want as you head out to battle?

I'll pray for you today too!

Plus, I'll work on getting a recent video up from a message I shared earlier this year at a homeschool conference about Biblical Fatherhood.

That'll be posted under @narrowminded, so keep your eyes open for that. Lord willing, it'll be this week.

Thanks!

Thanks for the prayer, friend. And as far as the arrows, more could be beneficial.

You're welcome!

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Haha those kids look so happy and healthy with their lollipops ! 🍭Your family is truely blessed ! They are lucky to have you and wife , and yous are very lucky to have them ! And thanks for the awsome news on a 5th on the way! When is number 5 Little- Pepper due to arive! And Congrats! Steem on! 👪👭👬💑

I believe that our next pepper is set to arrive in May.

Wow! Congrats! You better make a bunch of money here on steemit for your very full and happy family ! All those little peppers running around! Lol! You are truely blessed! Steem on! ♨🍼🍼♨

My girls have always been my world and always will be :)

They sure can bring a lot of joy and happiness to a parent, can't they?

They can plus a whole lots of worries

@papa-pepper

BLESSING

Amen to that !
I for one chose not to have kids - no, we don't use contraceptives.
Anyway, despite that my hub and I didn't choose to have children, we do see children as blessings as well.
In my early years of teaching, those children have kept me young at heart, made me laugh so many times and though it wasn't all just sugary moments - yes they could get into your nerves but if one would try to understand a child and see every good any child has - and just understand that - that child is a child - vulnerable like an empty vessel - what you impart and put in that empty vessel - shall mold him or her of becoming whoever they choose to be - then you would also see - how big a role adults play in rearing a human being.
And if one sees a child as a curse - specially their own - most of the time it is just projection. More or less - the parent of that person has suffered the same perception from their parents and have passed on the same perception to that person by treating them as one - curse. And so - subconsciously - it could be imparted to that person as well and subconsciously the person could perceive his or her own child as such. Given a chance to see that or at least be aware that, that's what happened, that person, too could turn such perception around.
If every parent would see their child as a blessing, we won't need shrinks nor police for every child who is treated as one - could grow up as one person - oozing with a bunch of energy and aura full of love.
I'm a fan of Joe the nanny - and through that kind of tv series, I have learned to love children the more.

Yeah, you've commented on my little ones before, so I know that you appreciate the blessings that little ones can be.

Less police and shrinks would most likely be one of the great results from more people looking at children this way.

Thanks @englishtchrivy!

Had a friend who had 10 children ( 2 or 3 of them were considered to be gifted) When asked why he had so many children , replied with, "Which one should I give away first?" No one ever answered that! The Home was always happy and the older ones assisted with the younger ones.

I think that when the older ones can help with the younger ones it prepares the girls to be mothers and the boys to be fathers.

That experience is missed in the age segregated school system and I think that our society suffers because of it.

We know some people with 14, 13, 11 or 10 kids too.

Damn you have a cute family :-)
I totally agree with you @pappa-pepper. i don't have any kids of my own, and unfortunately I never will. But I view kids as you do - they are a blessing and a source of extraordinary pleasure.
No matter how tired and grumpy I am, the sight of my godson or his little brother playing is enough to make me smile.
So, aroha to you my friend. May you have the children you deserve.

Hey, great-looking kids you got there.

Children are great. We loved having them around all the way through. Some folks lament the "terrible twos". I thought two was great, because real conversation started. That was awesome.
Others complain about teens. I loved the teens. We went mountain biking, to concerts, etc together. And they got to attend a couple of seminary classes with me. How many teenagers get to take Master's level Greek?!?!
On the other side of this coin is the entitlement/self-esteem nonsense so prevalent today. Some children think they're a blessing simply because they exist, even if they're disrespectful and destructive to their homes and families.

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