Why Do We Insist On Destroying Our Natural Instincts
When a baby is born , all they want is to be placed in the arms of their mother, but in most cases, they are taken away, washed, measured and weighted, sometimes these strange instruments are stuck up their noses and in their mouths. Their natural desire is to feel safe and secure, to hear their mothers heartbeat, the one sound they have become very accustomed to.
This sense of feeling safe happens when they are placed in their mothers arms and when this happens the mother and baby share an exchange of hormones that allows them both to fall madly in love with one another. But this needs to happen straight away after birth, both mother and baby need that time together, both of them are producing such a huge cocktail of love hormones for this exact moment. Yet so many do not get to experience this.
Right from the very beginning that first natural instinct is ignored.
When mother and baby are separated, the baby cries, because it wants to be with it's mother and yet all these procedures still take place, procedures put in place by the hospital mostly for their benefit. The babies cries go unanswered and now that little being experiences what it is like to be ignored and even worst to be scared and uncared for. They come into this world innocent, and so soon after birth they experience such distress, this is their first view of life, being surrounded by people who ignore them when they are crying out, crying out to so that they can feel safe, so that they can be in their mothers arms.
It is universally understood that when other animals are born you do not interfere and you do not separate the mother and baby, so why do we insist on doing it to ourselves, where is the logic in that. If both mother and baby are well, why can't we leave them for an hour or two.
Why at this very important time in both the mother and baby's life are we not allowing them to follow their natural instinct?
When babies cry and their calls to be picked up or cared for are ignored, how do you image that baby feels. Are we introducing the idea at a very young age that they have no power, that they don't matter. I have heard so many times from people not to spoil by baby by picking them up all the time. Well guess what for the first year at least, I more or less wore my babies all of the time. This felt natural to me, so I followed my own instinct in this matter. I really could not understand how holding your baby could ever be seen as spoiling them. They come into the world all full of hope and wonder and bam here we go knocking it all out of them by believing stuff like this horse shit.
And yes that sense of wonder that babies are born with, they are all born to be an explorer, to smell and touch and taste the world around them. Yet so many times they are told, no, no don't touch that it's dirty, don't put that in your mouth, don't pull that, no, no. no. That natural instinct to explore and learn for themselves about the world they have been born into is constantly being undermined. They are being told not to trust their own natural instinct. And then when they start to really move about, people get so nervous and fearful and they push those feelings onto the child.
Why are some people so adamant at undermining children, I guess a lot of the time it is learnt behaviour, they are only doing what was done to them. But are we not meant to be evolving, are we not meant to keep learning, striving to improve ourselves. But we are not taught to look at ways to improve our lives, we are taught to look at ways that adds more value to the society we live in, to add more power to those that rule. One sure way of doing that is to weaken our strength individually, finding ways to ensure that we sit still and listen, that we grow up knowing what authority is and that we know our place.
This is happening straight after birth for so many, this is something we need to realize that what is happening is not natural. Yet the amount of babies suffering this trauma is rising everyday. What are we going to do about it, what can we do about it. Find our voices, use them and if you are expecting, make sure you know your rights, make a birth plan and tell them you want your baby in your arms straight after birth and to be left undisturbed for the first hour at least. But most importantly really think about all the ways that our natural instincts are being undermined, and talk about it.And really start listening to yourself, trust yourself and trust your children
I would love to know what your thoughts are about Our Natural Instincts and why you think they are being destroyed
1st Image Source:http://www.playbuzz.com/jamievaughn10/which-of-the-three-basic-human-instincts-controls-your-life
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Honestly, I wouldn't see it that way. I believe that when humans were giving birth on their own, without all the modern professional support, the mothers had all the time in the world to spend with their babies. But the world has really changed, and medical support is employed, childbirth is no longer a solo thing, the professionals that get involved try to do everything as quickly as possible in order to go attend to some other person. I believe that's why they quickly take the child and run all those quick analysis, ignoring the child's cries. They believe that at that age, they do not have the ability to place their emotions.
but here in lies the problem because their time is placed above that of a baby's, those first moments, minutes are so important for mother and baby it is really really important that they are allow to bond naturally, it has an impact on the baby and the mother and that is so much more important to me than the medical professionals time, they just need to re arrange their time. Babies emotions are as important as any adult. Thank you @pundit for replying
Absolutely. Thanks for writing this. Not every one has the guts to challenge the norm.
Whenever I have seen child birth scenes in TV / movie it always seems like they put the child in the arms of the mother first, I never knew that they were taken away straight away unless there was something wrong with the baby for some reason. There is no doubt that there are so many hormones and things happening that it is vital to make that bond with the baby and obv for the baby who has just been through a stressful experience and now in a whole new environment needs basically to feel comfort like that of the womb. Babies are extremely sensitive and also many new mums experience post natal depression often, why is that? . I've never been sure about these extra pain reliefs given during child birth even when I was really young like a kid I always thought when I grow up and have a child I want a natural birth, it just seemed to literally be a natural desire for me.i honestly think we have been scared into thinking some how things will go wrong. But to me the whole idea going into hospitals scares me unless absolutely necessary. I don't think the air quality inside hospitals are good because they use very strong cleaning products filled with chemicals that go into our bodies, and that is our first breathes, its not exactly the most friendly welcome Into this world.
it is general practice to remove the baby, that 1st hour is so important for bonding and breastfeeding. There are so many procedures now during and after birth that have a huge impact on the baby and mother and definitely can result in post natal depression. Both baby and mama have this amazing hormone dance that needs to take place during both, if it is not natural and they are not together it does not happen. Thank you @celestialcow for your feedback xx
I regularly got in trouble for being a terrible parent for those exact reasons XD
Though overt here as far as i know they don't whisk baby off immediately, and usually do non essential checks in the same room.
thank you @ryivhnn, It really annoys me all these comments people have about holding our kids too much, I definitely have a be in my bonnet about that one.
it's the first hour after birth that is so important for the mother and baby, even if this checks are done in the same room as the mum they should be experiencing skin to skin time with one another, with no interruptions otherwise the natural release of hormones for both does not happen. I really think there needs to be more discussions and education about this. Thanks so much for getting involved.
Did this unnatural practice arrive in hospitals, around the same time cultural marxism took hold?
(the early 50's, lets say?)
Essentials for marxism to work....
1/Destroy the family unit...destroy the bonds that hold the family unit together.
Preventing the bond forming properly in the first place, by taking away the newborn...?
wow
That's worrying if it coincides...
thanks @lucylin, whether or not it is intentional it is the reality, a newborn should be in it's mothers arms and no where else, not in any one else's that's for sure and not being examined, that first hour at least longer if it can happen, we are born with the instinct to feed and that is taken from us if we are not in our mothers arms, also the mother's body releases hormones when with her baby that help expel the placenta and again that can not happen if they are not together, it is such a complex magical time that us humans are missing out on and as a result we are born fearful and experiencing separation anxíety
Ooh, reading your first paragraph gave me chills as I pictured the delivery room scenario. The very clinical, and disconnected ways newborns are brought into this world in most hospitals today...
You are absolutely right, those first few moments after birth are undeniably powerful with the amount of energy and emotion created from the process. I am not a mother yet, but when the time comes I plan to have a home birth as I don't like the way hospitals are run. Thanks for bringing this great content to life. We need to start questioning the "norms" we have today, and get back to our instincts.
Looking forward to following you and seeing more! 💫🙏
thanks so much @rainbowrachel, it really saddens me how little women know about the powerful effect hormones play in birth and after birth, so much is just not talked about and we are not educated about the power of our bodies, it is really disempowering not being aware. This is definitely one of my passions in life, education women about the power of their bodies and how our bodies know exactly what to do during and after birth, we just have to listen and trust xx
For me personally, i dont look at that way. i believe that they take the baby right after birth because for safety measures. Like they have to suction some mucus from the mouth and the nose so he can breathe properly. I think in the hospital philippines they put the baby immeadiately just below the tummy for the baby and the mother to benefit. Then right after they do suctioning etc then they put the baby to mothers after few hours considering its a well baby.
You have a good point though. Its actually hard to justify nature with science. Thank you for this insight. I must say its sensitive but it got me thinking as well.
thank you @sherylneil it is a sensitive subject because so many have a lot of faith in the medical profession and believe that they always do things in the patients best interest. It is not that long ago when all births took place outside of hospitals, so many mothers undergo so many interventions in hospital that it has a huge effect on the birth and the baby, those interventions cause distress for the baby and in the end they need more attention once born, it is such a viscous circle really. Most of the time in the hospital you are expected to birth within a certain time frame and when you don't then the interventions happen, their is a huge turn over of admissions in maternity wards.
I'm always very struck when I watch movies about England in the 1700s. It really strikes me that it was the height of sophistication to separate themselves from nature. If you think about it, humans had been at the whim of nature for a very, very long time. I think they felt quite evolved to be less and less the victims of it. It's clear that their entire demeanor is about separation from nature. To me, it's even clear that they're separating themselves from their human nature. I think that was the cool thing back in the day. You can imagine it must have been quite a wonder to be able to start to control themselves and nature. That's what I get out of it anyway. I think that mentality is still very much treasured; sophistication and civility is to separate yourself from your animal-like nature and from nature itself. Blame the English! Just something I observed from movies and sort of an innate feeling I have.
P.S. I read the Continuum Concept, and it really changed my life. Did you?
Thank you @brightstar, yes indeed this dominate attitude over nature really took off at that time, as a whole we are much more powerful when we are connected with nature i.e our true selves, for me as a women the oppression of women goes hand in hand with that, the introduction of religions, this greed for power. We most evolve of course but we must learn from our mistakes and for so many what we see as mistakes they see as progress, thank you for you input, it's really good connecting with you here and yes that book is amazing xx
It's a sickness that inflicts generations. We have to try and gain our sanity, and that's what you and I are doing here. 🙂
yes indeed, thank you @brightstar x
That thing about spoiling your baby is also something I hear all the time from my own family, but I have never understood that or listen to it. A baby and child need love, love, and LOVE. How could it be different? I still get comments from my family that I am not letting go of my baby, that I spoil him, that I should challenge him and ignore when he wants to be with me. This is what my parents believe, and my siblings. Can I be so wrong? Then I would rather be wrong that holding back my love and care for my child. We can only teach understanding and empathy with our actions. How else will our children learn it?
Thank you for writing this article my dear.
My baby was taken away from me half a hour or so after birth for measuring and diaper. But I told my partner to hold him and stay near him while they did that, it was in the same room. But for the next time, I know better! I also carried my baby as long as I could (he weighted 13 kilos when he was 9 months), and all the time! My family thought I was crazy;) Lol!
thank you Niina, I hear you I have got so close to losing mý temper when people have said that to me, what could be more natural and all you are teaching your son is that you love him and you are there for him and that he is important in your life, he can depend on you then and as he gets older he will be all the more confident for it, I have seen it with my 2 oldest. Well done mama, you are doing great xxx
It is somehow strange to teach people the opposite of our natural instincts. I get quite insecure sometimes (more at the beginning, not so much now anymore) when my own family says things like that to me, but luckily I am very stubborn and do mostly the opposite of what they say is right;) I trust my own feelings and knowledge.
xxx Hugs!!