Steem Basic Income Giveaway: Butter goes on which side?

in #contest7 months ago (edited)

I'm still not quite caught up with the posting scheduling... so, I think this post is coming out about a week later than I had hoped... but I'm getting there! Thank you to all the entrants in the Most Annoying Sound question from about a fortnight ago! There were some truly hoorible sounds that even just imagining them gives me the creeps....

This week is a bit of an odd question... mostly as it was something that just came up between my wife and I during the week... and something that led me to have a look on the internet and then find that I wasn't the first person to ever have asked this!

Well, it all starts with crackers... you know, the sort with some sort of seeds or a clear "top"! ... and if you butter it, or you put stuff on top of it... which side would you have as the "top"?

My Question


  1. Give that the makers of crackers have completely abdicated their responsibility adn failed to include instructions on how to butter and use crackers... which side of the cracker do you butter? Or put stuff on top of? Explain yourself....

My sample answer



Well.. obviously, this is the only correct orientation for a cracker... the butter goes with the side with the seeds and the holes (dimples...) for holding the butter... I'm afraid that I've always done this... and never realised that people could ever be so perverse as to do it the other way around! Sadly... I just found out that one of these crazy extremists is my wife...

Consider a doughnut or some sort of cake with topping... you wouldn't turn it over to have the icing on the bottom... that would just be crazy! Likewise if you had a bun with melted cheese on top... the topping (in this case, the seeds...), is called the topping because it is on the TOP!



If you did this... the topping is on the BOTTOM! Plus, everytime you took a bite... the seeds would fall off and make a huge mess (maybe that's why my wife is a messy cracker eater...). It is wrong and there is just no way that this could ever work... anyone who butters (or puts stuff on...) this side of the cracker really should have their driver's licences revoked and sent to a camp to atone for their crimes against..... food and common sense.


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no no no no....wrong side...the correct answer is the BOTTOM or the Top as a think.
if make no sense to call it the bottom its the flat part its the top one..bad news you are eating in on the bottom. the flat part is holing the butter in a thin layer on the bottom part you need so much more butter to get it all over. so by putting on the thin layer you can the cracker whit many layers of meat, fish and peanut butter jam etc. not on the same one a hope.

Haha... now I'm starting to get really confused... we should agree on my definition of top and bottom!

the real question which way they are when yo opening them. or is it a correct way to opening them..:P

Unfortunately, the manufacturer again abdicated responsibility and put them in sideways... Which I think we can all definitely agree is the worst of all worlds!


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I don't use butter, but I put my stuff on the flat TOP.
The reasoning is simple: If I where to use the other side I would get an uneven distribution of stuff, and many of the sunflower seeds would get stuck on my knife and I would end up having my stuff full of those seeds.

Also the ugly side(with this asymmetrical distribution of holes and seeds) is normally the bottom because you wouldn't want to see that while eating.

Ah... but if that was the ugly side... why do they use it for the marketing shot on the box?!

Some people like butts.

Posted via

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No way Jose oh no John sorry
I have been buttering, meltcheesing or chocopasta-ing my kanckerbrod cracker on the plain side.

I guess its a women’s thing hahahahah
Have a great Sunday,
How did week 1 of school go?

No... it's more of crazy nut thing rather than a women's thing!

Week 1 went pretty good... It wasn't too difficult as our kids stayed in the same classes (they group together groep 3/4/5 for the Middelbouw) so there was no anxiety about starting with a new juf or classmates! How was yours?

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

I would put butter on the smooth side because it would use fewer calories. 😁

LOL!... and oddly enough, that has been one of the more logical reasons....

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

So it is becoming clear to me that this is not a problem that people in the United States typically have to deal with (at least not my family). I don't think I have ever eaten a cracker that has seeds (or other toppings). Our crackers usually look the same regardless of what side is up.

And I have never put butter on a cracker. I have however put peanut butter on a cracker. So glad that I have been able to learn a little bit more about other people's cracker eating habits. I hope you all figure out this great debate!

Ha... perhaps that was a historical precedent... too many wars caused by this debate that one country decided to do away with problem altogether!

But what about ritz crackers? What side of the ritz cracker would you put the peanut butter on?

Posted via

I like ritz crackers. I just put peanut butter on whichever side is facing. If you know something I don't know about which side is up, then let me know :)

My kids freak if I make them backwards, they are like tiny hamburger buns and the flat parts are what gets the topping.

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

I rarely eat crackers with butter or toppings...but if I have to, I'll have the butter on the "smooth" side (mostly the back), and have the topping on the other side! Sure this won't work if I want to have both at the same time, but I'm almost sure that it won't, even if it happens, I'll wipe the butter on the "rough" side and have it hold the toppings. I mean, that feels right but not the other way round...

That's right!... wait... you are agreeing with me, right?

I think I am!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

Butter or spreads go on the top in my mind.

The top that I have defined... right?

No! Nobody agrees with you! LOL Just kidding, my five year old is at school so I am acting like him to get it out of my system.

Posted via

Yes, I'm starting to realise that there are more weird people in the world than I could ever have imagined... Time to duck back into my safe little box!

Yes. I would think the one that you define as the top.

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

hahahahahha, I know this discussion as me and my former housemate used to have it very often! I use the topside so can smear the holes full with butter making the cracker juicier..
BUT....when the toppings are too 'instable' and might fall off, I use the bottom side hahaha


Instability is solved with MORE butter!... but you use both sides? There's only one thing worse than an extremist... and that is a fence-sitter!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

First off - TY so much for the win @bengy! I love my SBI. That was an interesting question last week, I also had trouble with some of the sounds people talked about!

With this one - I am on your team. The others are WRONG to butter the smooth side. I am having trouble to think someone would even think of using THE BOTTOM of the cracker for butter. Just even how it is packed tells you this. Wow...

Yes... right, they even show the seeded side... if they wanted to butter the other side, they would have photographed that for the box! ... sadly, I don't think the others are going to see the error of their ways...

Your ritz peanut butter sandwhiches must look funny!!!

Posted via

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

I will put it on the rough side. The side with the holes and designs. That's the face😁 so that's where to do butter make-up 🤣

Exactly! Who puts make up on their butt?

But butter is more like lotion...

Posted via

Uh... Okay, you keep your butter fetish to yourself!

🤣🤣🤣🤣 nobody I know

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

I personally can concur with bottom, although I butter and jam the top side, I then flip it and bite it upside down so the jelly/toppings touch my tongue first!

Oooookkkkkay... that's a special sort of crazy!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

Hahaha, so funny. Can't join this week, 'cos I don't eat crackers.

Very relate-able, though. I can't explain how surprised I was when i first saw my girlfriend fold a slice of bread. I had always folded the top to the bottom (red arrow). Before I saw her do it, it never even occurred to me that it would even make more sense to fold it differently (green arrow).


No crackers? Ahhhh... a poor deprived soul!

.... as for your bread. SYMMETRY! You can't fold it up or down, or the sides don't match!

You can't fold it up or down, or the sides don't match!

Exactly, but I never thought of it like that, lol.

Oh no. I do triangles...

Posted via

That wouldn't be symmetric, either, I think 😉

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

It drives me crackers to know which side to paste
but it doesn't matter long as done not in haste.
to paste the wrong side doesn't matter,
as long as doesn't stick to the platter.
on top to put a mussel
to still stomach's hustle.

My attempt at a poem, or a rhyming poem.

Ha! Nice one... but I see you didn't take a side!

... but an extra bonus SBI share for you when the post pays out for the poem!

People are so different my friend that I think you will find both options in your comments. I have just taken the middle road that might satisfy all.
Thank you for the kindness,

Ha, or satisfy no one!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

Thank you and although I have entered, I for the ultimate time will be disqualified for some reason or another hahaha
Such is life my friend!

@bengy, This question is out of my League because i don't eat butter much. Enjoy your time ahead.

Ha, you are kidding out! Butter is the best!,

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

👍 👍

Posted using Partiko Android

Ha ha ha! I'm a bottom man! 🤣

Posted using Partiko Android

Heh...we all have our little perversions!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

You are a horrible cracker eater and you have it all wrong.

Imagine all of the seeds and grains you are leaving on the butter knife, that now the next person must eat.

What if you were making a cracker sandwhich? Its like putting the hamburger on TOP of the sesame seed bun!

Posted via

Oh, those are internet fighting words! Why should you make a cracker sandwich? A single cracker is hard enough to snap through! A second cracker with filling is just asking for broken crackers and teeth everywhere! Cracker sandwiches don't exist!

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

Dude it's the bottom, the smooth side. Things are equally spread, no extra butter in the pockets and it holds better when you sandwich it. The top side is bumpy and making it a sandwich that why makes it wobbly and breaks easier. Yes I sandwich my crackers sometimes.

Therefore bottoms up 😉

Posted using Partiko Android

I already mentioned this to another commentator... Cracker sandwiches are just fake news, they don't exist!

Extra butter in the pockets! That's a good thing! More taste, more buttery goodness!

Besides, you are calling it the bottom! That is giving it away!

Hahaha!! Not fake news and it works so well!

It's ok only good for more taste but not for the calories and the gut.

Good catch although I called it that as to not confuse you as you are already thinking it's the backwards method. 😉

Posted using Partiko Android

hahaha. Told ya.

The winners of the SBI Giveaway and the new question (Irrational Fears...) can be found here:

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@bengy I stand with you.

BUT, this only applies to single cracker to spread consumption. I were making a cracker sandwich like cheese or peanut butter between two crackers I would have the bottoms touch the topping with the spread in between, while the tops as you see them would be facing out.

... I don't know... this was an important topic that really should be hard coded into the next hard fork. There are no cracker sandwiches... it is all lies. I know other commenters have mentioned the existence of such things... but no.... it is not possible.