1,500 Words of Triumph: What Influence Has Yoga Had On Your Life?

in #yoga7 years ago

@quinneaker asks meaningful personal questions to spark thought & encourage valuable communication. He once asked me, "What influence has yoga had on your life?"


That's a GREAT question!!

I'd like to scratch the surface of the infinite depths here, #1 to remind myself that miracles are real, and #2 in hopes it might inspire someone else towards their greatest self.



To understand my journey, you have to know where I was:

I was severely depressed for a really long time after my sister died. On top of every aspect of life sucking sweaty balls without her, I developed debilitating, chronic hip pain. (It was much later before I recognized the link between emotional, mental, and spiritual pain and disorders in the physical body, but that's another story.) 

I made really poor choices back then because I hurt so bad, and my guilt and self judgment made me feel even worse - it was the downward spiral of absolute hell! I thought I was doomed to a lonely life of suffering. 

I wanted to die, because I was desperate for an escape from that overwhelming pain...but I was too scared to kill myself. 

I was caught in the pits of despair, with no way out. 



I was miserable, and nothing I grasped at made me happy - no job  satisfied me, no amount of money gratified me, no relationship fulfilled me, no food could satiate me. Thank God I never found drinking enjoyable and didn't really have access to drugs in those days. Music was the best thing I found, but that fleeting distraction faded when the last notes died out. 

Words are too weak to describe the desolation of hopelessness; it is a cold, dark, sad place.

Yoga is the miracle that helped me survive those darkest days.


Life wasn't working for me, but death wasn't an option - so I tried the impossible:

I went to a yoga class.

And I was terrified.

While I had seen plenty of impressive pictures of yogis in contorted positions, it was not the physical aspect of the practice that intimidated me.  I have always been relatively flexible, and years of playing competitive volleyball taught me the value of steady practice. 

I wanted - but doubted & feared - connection to Spirit.

On spirituality: I am from Oklahoma, where you either accept Jesus Christ as your lord & savior, "or you are a terrorist". This mentality is way too limited for me!

Religion NEVER did it for me, and I don't understand it. I'm totally amazed that millions if not BILLIONS of people are willing to ignore the rampant pedophilia within the Catholic Church. In fact, all Abrahamic matrices that call for the systemic mutilation of baby penises are pretty sick...that's not my definition of God, that's barbaric! Yet the sheeple just keep sheepling along...but, I digress.

Anyhoo, if I wanted Spirit, I had to find something beyond the chokehold of the "God" monopoly that exists where I grew up.  

Yoga was foreign, mystical, exotic, enticing. I knew exercise was known to help overcome depression, but I was drawn to yoga specifically because a) I thought it was gentle (ha!) and b) it was the only "exercise" I ever heard of that addresses deeper levels of Being. 

So I found a non-threatening yoga class in the gym of my university, put on my stretchy pants...and panicked.

I thought that "I" was broken - what if my Spirit was a demon that really DID want to torture me? What if I looked within and found only rotten pestilence, fire & brimstone? What if it didn't work??

Basically, I was incredulous that I could ever achieve that mystical thing they called "inner peace."

Looking back on it, it is unsurprising that I actually hated the first yoga class I took with that kind of attitude. 

Even though the teacher focused exclusively on physical movement and never touched on more ethereal topics like our everlasting Spirit, I still had no idea what he was talking about. The moves were strange, not to mention he peppered his instructions with Sanskrit, and I felt awkward AF while everyone else seemed graceful and connected. 

I left unsatisfied and didn't go back there.

Still, I wanted to believe that those thousands of years of yoga tradition were on to something...so I tried a different approach.



People who spoke highly of yoga also spoke highly of meditation. Eventually I learned they complementary flavors in the same dish, but at that time it too was a foreign concept. But I gave it a shot, because I had nothing to lose.

I sat down on a pillow in my bedroom and focused on my breath. I started with only 5 minutes a day, reasoning I could do anything for 5 minutes. My mind jumped around so much that I had to use a timer so I wouldn't jump off my cushion!!  

Five minutes felt good - I was proud of myself for achieving my goal. Small though it was, it was a great success for my tormented mind. I vowed to do it every day, and noted results with each session.

After only a week of daily meditation, I actually felt BETTER!!! I was calmer, happier, more focused, and could not deny those results. I even started looking forward to my daily meditation sessions! 

Feeling better was far superior to feeling shitty, so I did more. Very soon I was doing 10 minutes, then 15 or 20 every single day. Eventually I gave up the timer completely.





I felt so good from meditation alone that I wanted to give yoga another shot. I got a DVD and committed to a daily practice in my living room. That turned out to be one of the best things I've ever done!

I still felt awkward because the positions were so weird and I was really uncoordinated, but after a few days I recognized that it was like a moving meditation. 

My mind took a break from the hellish thoughts I was living with most of the time, because I had to focus on just not falling over. 

I quickly recognized that there was a pattern to the movements and a flow to the routine - one pose loosens and/or strengthens part of the body, which prepares you for whatever comes next in the series, which leads into something else as well.

A single practice built up to a really yummy physical release/expansion/shift that caused immediate, deep, and best of all lasting mental, emotional, and spiritual relief...I didn't have "proper" vocab for what was happening, and I was doing it alone in my living room so there was no one to ask. 

I called the experience a yogasm.


That was it - one good yogasm, and I was in love. 



There is no way to deny an experience like that. The effects reverberate well after the physical practice concludes. It is free, it is fast, and it is ALWAYS accessible!

I practiced every day to that DVD, and within a month my hip pain was gone!!

I started practicing with my roommate, and I loved how having another person in the room added a new dimension to my practice. 

I found the courage to try again, so I found a studio I liked and started going regularly.



The more I practiced, the more improvements I saw - and they seemed to increase at an exponential rate. 

Yoga had once been this foreign, inaccessible concept to me, and suddenly I could do it! 

And it made me feel great! I spent less and less time in depression and more and more time in love, gratitude & happiness. I started dreaming of all the other things I could do...and then I did them.

I moved to Peru and did lots of epic things, including taking yoga teacher training. So I got all certified & legit and started teaching in English and Spanish.



Then I was offered the opportunity to lead yoga tours in India, the yoga motherland, so I did that too. I did yoga in the Himalayas. I did yoga by the Ganges. I studied with masters and at a university for yoga & ayurveda. I did vipassana meditation and hung out with Tibetan Buddhist monks and taught them some yoga flows too. 



It was a pilgrimage for me, and I gave infinite thanks for my journey from darkness to light, from ignorance to empowerment, from pain to joy.



I've learned A LOT along my way, and it is my great pleasure to share everything I know. Yoga is relief for mind, body, and soul that can benefit anyone! 

Seriously, if I can do it, you can do it - which is why I focused on sharing my passion for yoga when I joined Steemit. It was a great honor to share yoga at Steemfest the First in Amsterdam last year and at SteemFest 2 this year in Lisboa.

Yoga brought me back from the dead. I know its superpowers first hand, and I want everyone to feel as great as they possibly can! 

It is my great wish that my experience gives YOU hope -
please let me know how I can be of service to you! 

Now I would like to know: What influence has yoga had on YOUR life?






💛 Sara! 

Sort:  

Oh my goodness @saramiller, this post nearly had me in tears, SO many similarities between my personal yoga journey (even down to the emotional hip pain) and what you've so bravely shared here has SO SO encouraged me.

I think this is definitely going to be one of my first posts of the new year after I've finished my 30 day challenge for December, Thank you SO much for sharing your yoga chronicles.

I can't wait to share mine
<3

I so appreciate you taking the time to comment, @dayleeo! I am honored that you are encouraged by my story and feel blessed that it can be of service to you. It felt like eternity when I was in that hell and I truly hated it, but now that I'm through it...if that suffering can ease the suffering of someone else & make this world a better place, then it was worth it 💛 💛 💛

...as long as I don't have to go back there, anyway!! 😂
Realistically I don't think I can ever be in that same spot again, because at least now I have hope & some tools for if I start to drop into the funks. Prevention is key, and yoga is one of my best methods for prevention.

I am excited to read your story! I find it very helpful to get it in writing and out of the body, plus as we see sharing it can help someone else which changes the whole experience completely...Steemit is such a cool place!!!!!!!!! 💛 💛 💛

You're right! I'm looking forward to even more healing taking place as I articulate with keystrokes and force myself to put words to all those icky feelings and memories.

And you're right, you'll never be back in that place because you'll see it coming LONG before you get there, and you already have learned how to build your ladder out! Onward and upward sister!

I'll be working on that post this week <3

Writing has been it's own kind of yoga practice for me. I hope you find all the healing you need + so much more as you get it all out! I'll be looking out for your post 💛

Thanks love <3 ive got all the inspo i need to start <3

Thanks for sharing your yoga story! Very inspiring and powerful for so many. Depression can be so debilitating and I love hearing stories like this where people have rewired their brains for joy.

Yes!

Conscious re programing!

It is the key and maybe the most powerful ability one can have!

YES THANK YOU QUINN! The choice is always ours to build the life we really want, and it's vital to take responsibility for that and CHANGE anything that's not working!

Having gone from a theistic worldview for most of my life to a non-theistic worldview, I realize how flexible our entire thinking framework can be, if we put in the hard work to reprogram it. That, and studying neurosciency stuff. :)

Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment! I hope you might consider a yoga practice for yourself and your family. It's one of the best, fastest, easiest methods I know for rewiring the system, and I've seen people of all ages benefit greatly from it! I think you would find it fascinating to study how the brain & body are engaged in a yoga practice @lukestokes.

Yes, depression is a really awful program to get stuck in. Once you're in it, it's so easy to spiral downward...but I am living proof that it's possible! The trick is to remember all these effective and successful tools for reset. That's the challenge, because when you feel bad and start to lose hope it seems to take a superhuman amount of effort to pop out of it.

Prevention is really key for me. I still have lower days, but nowhere near like the hell I used to live. I find that when I consciously take care of my health with a regular yoga practice and nutritious foods and other positive inputs, my mental state is much more stable and joyful. It's a feedback loop!

My wife and kids do a regular Friday yoga meetup with a bunch of other homeschoolers and love it. I'm a bit hesitant to get back into it myself because my first experience with it was via YouTube. @corinnestokes and I were doing a daily Yoga with Adriene thing and for the first week or two it was great! And then... my back started hurting. I think I was trying to replicate what the professional was doing (along with my wife who was a dancer for many years). I wasn't bending my knees enough when leaning forward and I jacked things up. I started to get sciatica pain and had to stop. After months of physical therapy, finally, things came back to normal. I was worried I'd have to get surgery or something.

So yeah, if I do it again, I'll probably do it with some professionals who can ensure I'm not doing something wrong. That said, for a while I was doing the Wim Hoff method which was super interesting. I eventually stopped because... well, I'm not entirely sure. I felt like it was breaking down my immune system or something because I kept getting sick. It was also a bit of work and I've been busy doing cryptocurrency stuff lately. :)

As for depression, a lot of people in my community (computer programmers) deal with that an anxiety on a regular basis. A friend started OMI which has helped a lot of people. I think talking openly about mental health challenges is the first part of ending the stigma and helping more people find peace. Few people snicker when someone has a sprained ankle. Why should it matter if their brain isn't producing ideal chemicals? It's just another physical malfunction and there are many fantastic natural ways to deal with it.

I my self am not a fan nor a practitioner of yoga or the Wim Hoff Method. I find routines, rules, rights, wrongs, have to's, supposed to's, should, etc to be very limiting.

Ideally one is conscious enough to know what one is lacking in and improve it. Ideally one is conscious enough to know what one is strong in and build upon it.

I firmly believe that no one can tell us how to be a master and thus we must tall realize that our selfs.

I attempt and intend to help others do this knowing that one must find it ones self.

Yoga is a means to and end. The end is to realize ones self and be healthy, strong, flexible, happy etc.

I detest "yoga class" yet I embody yoga and do it every day. That is the paradox of mastery.

I am always here for you should you request anything.

Bless~*~

no one can tell us how to be a master

Oh God, how easily I forget that I AM the one and only thing responsible for my experience!!! And what a blessing to remember I have the power!!!

Being human is a crazy trip.

It's cool to hear your wife & kids enjoy yoga together! I think children are naturals at it. I remember when I started practicing, some of the moves were things I would do regularly as a child because they were just super fun and felt good.

One of the ladies here at the GOE likes yoga with Adriene a lot, and if I remember correctly we tried one of her practices! I've also heard quite a lot about Wim Hoff lately...that's interesting you mention him again.

Personally, I'm not a big fan of classes. I think they can be really helpful for a beginner because you learn some moves & methods, but ultimately the practitioner is always the most important one and no one knows what they really need but themselves. My own goal as a "teacher" is to help the "students" develop a sustainable practice, which means tuning into their own breath's pace & their own body's needs in any moment. I can assist by suggesting routines, breathing exercises, and other practices that may strengthen, open, or address particular physical, mental, emotional, or physical issues (like hip openers, for example, or stress relief), but without being real with your own body it doesn't really matter. I published something to help with sciatica if that is still an issue you deal with, @lukestokes.

I totally agree that depression is a physical malfunction and that there are wonderful, accessible, non-invasive, free, cheap, easy, natural solutions!! Unfortunately the mind gets so warped and it can feel so isolating, which can make someone withdraw more, which can make it worse and on and on...it's really horrible when you're in it! Awareness is indeed key - there is always hope!!!

If you know anyone dealing with it now or future, please let them know that I'm a success story & I would be happy to share my experience with them. I'm really amazed that I didn't kill myself, and at this point I think it's because I'm supposed to help others going through similar darkness and be of service. I'm going to look into the OMI link you shared!

Beautiful comment. Thank you. I would love to share this with those who are open and interested in potential solutions for their mental health challenges. Thankfully my sciatica has been fine lately, but I will definitely check that out if I have issues again.

Great to see that this post is getting some attention and support as it is a post of res life value.

I am grateful that I have inspired you and that you are consciously embracing and evolving with it!

∞§∞Blessings∞§∞

Thanks Quinn! 💖

SO grateful for the infinite inspiration you provide! You have made my life better in so many ways and have been the direct influence for MUCH of my growth/change...it is priceless and so meaningful to me.

And what's way more amazing than what you have done for me personally is that you offer the same upgrades, support, nurturing, presence, love, guidance, protection, purafire, awareness + much more for EVERYONE -- it is an epic thing to witness.

I am honored to learn from you ~ thank you for sharing! 💛💖💛💖💛💖

Yes∞
∞§∞Bless∞§∞

What an epic experience and inspiring story @saramiller!! 💛 💚💛 💚

Thank you, indeed it has been quite a ride! While I still have days where I struggle, now I have hope and faith and trust that it's within my power to change, and that makes a huge difference. May it continue to get better! 💛 💚 💛 💚 💛 💚 💛 💚

The power of positive perspective changes everything for the better, so it can't get anything else but better! :)

Thank you for this! Yoga totally changed my life. When I'm pissed, go to yoga. When I'm sad, go to yoga. When there is something to celebrate, go to yoga. When I don't want to go to yoga, go to yoga! ha! It truly is that connecting force between all things. Yoga gave me the courage to get through the mud, to know my worth, to find beauty within, to love deeply and it taught me how to cry! oxox

Ahhhhhh thank all the gods for YOGA!!!! So glad to hear you know it & trust it & use it liberally @k10yoga. You/we are learning so many important lessons through it...it's like a missing piece of the puzzle for dealing with this crazy human life! Many blessings~*~

Practiced yoga for almost 6 months straight once every day. I remember feeling better than I ever had in the first three months, and then losing focus the last 3 months and the practice not really benefiting me anymore. But the most important thing I learned was how much your breath controls everything. When I focused on my breath during the movements my body opened up to a greater extent, probably because I was activating my parasympathetic nervous system. And when I did mindlessly the second half I wasn't getting into that state and got stuck into the sympathetic state, which says "when is this going to be over?"

You bring up some valuable things. I find that the more regularly I practice, the easier it is to maintain a regular practice! If I skip a day or two, it's a lot easier to continue skipping days and then it feels "harder" to get back into a routine. But no matter how long it's been, every time I come back to my mat it comes right back to me. But what it gives me/what I take from it can be different with every single session.

Yes, I agree that the breath is foundational! I think it's way more important than the physical postures, but in many of the Western yoga classes I've been to more emphasis is placed on the poses than the breath. I think it's vital to keep the focus on the breath! Plus, the breath is ALWAYS accessible, no matter what you're doing you're always breathing. If you're at the office or driving around or something, it's harder to pop into a headstand to reset yourself than to take like 10 really deep, amazing breaths. :)

Yoga is so fast and effective for conscious reprogramming because it has the unique ability to activate the sympathetic & parasympathetic nervous system at the same time IF you learn to tie your movement to your breath. It's fascinating to look at the science behind it all!

I highly recommend giving it another shot if you have turned away from your practice. The poses and even breathing are only a few aspects of a really rich yoga practice, and perhaps if you look at it again you will find the exact aspect you need in this moment :)
Motivation & commitment are a few of my biggest challenges with a practice. If I get bored with a physical practice, I find it might be time to crank up the intensity, or sometimes even switch to something more mellow and nurturing. OR it might be time to consider deeper meditation and less movement for a bit.

For me, even if I'm not getting physical every day, yoga is a lifestyle that I can never fully disengage.

Blessings, @mattmcclanahan~*~

I meant to comment on this the other day when I first read it. Really amazing to see what people can do with their lives when they work out the garbage and find something to connect with! I have often had that same fear of what evil may lurk under the surface (I honestly think that is the mercury), but also there is a mental component to it as well. I thought if I ever acknowledge anything bad about myself I would turn into my parents and that was totally unacceptable to me. I have learned so much from all of you @gardenofeden about who I am and how to use/accept that to move on to something even better. You inspire me to have better health because I really did love it when I was doing yoga and I want to be back in that place and frame of mind!

Life is a crazy place!!! Or perhaps more accurately, the human mind is a crazy place...It's absolutely incredible how bad we can scare ourselves with just our thoughts, and I know I for one can construct elaborate scenarios to reinforce any emotion, and then I can totally believe them without realizing there is little outside of myself to substantiate it. It's both a blessing and a curse, and of course it all depends on perspective...or so I'm learning :)

I'm honored to inspire - it makes everything I went through make a little more sense. And you know how us Virgos just LOVE for things to make sense!!

Yoga is always worth practicing. The benefits it adds far outweigh any perceived "costs". I don't know why I forget that, but I fall in and out of habit of regular practice & I can tell a difference in how I feel.

The good news is that if we can use our power of mental projection to create these disastrous crap realities, then we can do the same with wonderful and positive things!

Inspiring!!!

Thank you! You are too!!!!

Great post @saramiller, thanks for sharing. You inspired me to get off my ass and do yoga again. I can relate so much to you story, I too have hip issues and yoga help heal my MCL. I also agree with your comments regarding religion. Nice to have found you here.

Hi there @aleluzdosol77 - nice to meet you! It's amazing that although I am extremely familiar with how great yoga is, sometimes I can still justify falling out of the habit of regular practice. I hope you'll get back to it and feel better than ever!

Great story so glad you found your path! I am writing a series on my spiritual yogic path so you'll have to check that out to see how yoga affected me! :)

Awesome, looking forward to learning about your journey, @vibeof100monkeys!

Great hope to get it done over weekend before new year!±

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