The Woman Who Moved | Story Writing Collaboration - Part 4

in #writing7 years ago (edited)

Once again, I broke my own rules! This is Part 4 of a collaborative story between myself, @insideoutlet and @lilyraabe. We are telling a story, round-robin style, and the only two rules are to stick to between 300-400 words and not to consult each other, between parts, about the story.
 
I used 690 words this time - My apologies, Erin and Lily! I did try keep it down, and edited heavily after I was done (It was 753 before editing...). But as you'll see, there was just no other way of telling this part of the story with fewer words.
 
So, rule change! We are not allowed to go beyond 700 words! 😋 But also, no fewer than 350!
 
If you haven't already, go read the first three parts of the story:
 
✒ Part 1
✒ Part 2
✒ Part 3
 
And then come back here and continue with...

The Woman Who Moved - Part 4



 

... I collided into her, falling to the ground. Before I could regain my composure, she was off again, running faster than her age should have allowed.

I cried out, desperately... Wait! In a furious panic, I ran after her. I couldn't lose her! Yes, she might be able to provide some sort of solution to this mystery, but honestly, at the time, all I wanted was someone else to talk to. Someone who would look at me, smile or grimace at me... Anything! I had been starved of such basic human contact for so long and was hungry for it...

I chased her through many twisted streets and alleys, into the lowers parts of the city down by the river. Every time I thought I was about to catch up to her, she appeared suddenly more distant, waiting at another corner further on. Eventually, as I was about to give up, she stopped... The surrounding houses were in terrible disrepair and the narrow street was dirty and full of rats. I approached carefully as she stood at a doorway, looking straight at me.

As I reached her, out of breath, I started speaking, asking too many questions all at once, but she only stood there, with a finger to her mouth, waiting with a calm patience in her bright blue eyes. When it looked like she would never answer me, I fell to my knees and broke down, weeping.

I then felt her hand on my shoulder, and oh, to be touched again! The sensation rippled through me like an intense orgasm.

But when I looked up at her, all the joy I was feeling was immediately snuffed out by her expression of pure concern and anger. It was dreadful to behold... She straightened up, opened the door we had stopped in front of, and pointed inside.

What else could I do? I got up, and slowly walked inside, letting my eyes adjust to the dark. When I turned around, the woman in red was no longer there. No! I looked back out on the street, but there was no sign of her. It wouldn't be the last time I saw her, however.

Going back inside, I explored the house. It was small and surprisingly clean. A woman was in the kitchen, having just taken bread buns out of the oven. I helped myself to one, for later.

I couldn't understand though, why the woman in red had led me here, and I was about to leave when I saw a trapdoor in the kitchen floor.

I opened it up, and found a flight of stairs going down into what I at first thought would be a pantry. I was surprised to find that it was a bedroom... A girl's bedroom, by the looks of it, and there, on the bed, was a little girl sitting up in the corner under a duvet, with what I later discovered was her father, also sitting on the bed, reading a book to her.

I smiled at the scene, moving closer... I had no children of my own but still hoped that I would, one day.

And then I saw it... And I suddenly understood the woman in red's dreadful expression, for now it was on my own face. The father's other hand was below the duvet... He was obviously reaching for the girl with the most malign intentions imaginable. Rage filled me and I instinctively tried to pull him away. Of course, he didn't budge. In frustration, I ripped a loose floorboard up and hit him in the face, but in vain. It didn't even leave a mark.

But as I sat there trying to figure out what to do... How to save this poor girl... A sudden vague idea of why this was all happening to me entered my mind. Until this moment, I had been doing nothing but wandering around, lost, with no purpose, serving only myself, wading in self-pity... So perhaps if I started trying to fix things... Look for wrongs in the city, and attempt to right them... Perhaps that would be my salvation...

I had to try!


What will happen next? Be sure to keep a look out on @lilyraabe's blog for Part 5!




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This is a live version of choose your own adventure. I applaud this serious combination of forces and curious about where this will go next.

Ooh, you're right, that's actually exactly what it is! =) .. I've actually had an idea for writing a Choose Your Own Adventure... Used to love those books as a kid!

Thank you for the applause ;)

Hey, I know you! I started a Discord server for dolphinschool, come on over, all former participants are welcome as mentors. https://discord.gg/RrUyccN

Thanks @dolphinschool. Do you never get burned out? That's a lot of work.

Well, sure, I'm human, but this is also my full time gig at the moment. Aiming to make a living wage from Steemit by April, then build up from there. It's kind of a missional thing with me. I think this platform has the potential to change several million lives.

YES. Turning her into an avenging hero is AWESOME. I can’t wait to see where it will have gone by the time I get it back. I need to wrap it up, ya?

=D ... Glad you liked it ^^ ... Uhm, not necessarily. 6 parts would be a good number to finish at, actually... Anything longer and there's less chance people will want to take the time to go all the way back to read it all... But it depends on the story... If you see a good way to end it on your turn, yeah, do it =) ... If not, set it up, and I'll end it =)

Oh okay awesome! I kind of like the idea of you wrapping it up if that’s cool with you! :)

@lilyraabe, can you do Part five, I cannot follow that. I'm sorry.

I’m on it, haha, truthfully I was glad I didn’t have to be the one to follow that up, but I have an idea. :)

WHAT?? This is amazing! Can I get in if you do it again? I may have to start this myself. Very cool! BTW, I started a Discord server for Dolphin School and I'm doing a project that launches Sunday I'd love all of you to participate in. This is seriously cool, I almost had this idea, but mine was more complicated. I love it! Here's the discord server. And a great story too! Reading the other parts. https://discord.gg/RrUyccN

Hehehe... Hi, Mark! .. Been a while! Firstly, thank you for the praise ;) And hell yeah, you can get in next time =) .. And if you start one before I do another one, count me in! ^^ .... Secondly, please accept my apologies for not following you much since the end of Dolphin School. I've been hard at work applying everything you taught us and it has been difficult to keep up with everyone! (Especially when I still get bandwidth limitations at certain times of the day!) ... Gonna join your Discord now =)

No apologies required. You don't owe me anything. Let me know how I can help you, I feel like I haven't gotten back around to support all of you the way I'd like to.

This is excellent. You three have worked so well together!

Thank you very much =) ... I hope you can join in next time ;)

After she spent months doing nothing but things for her own gain, she finally decided to do something for others. Maybe this all happened to her because there are a person close to her that she must protect.

It's getting more and more interesting!!

I'm so glad you're enjoying the story! ^^ I'll be writing the final part for Saturday, I hope =)

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