The Woman Who Moved | Story Writing Collaboration - Part 5

in writing •  2 years ago  (edited)

Women with the power to stop time are the heroes of this story I’m co-writing with 2 friends on steemit: @mandelsage and @insideoutlet!


The proposed idea was that we would write the story round-robin style, without consulting each other between each post, for a 7-part story!


Catch up on the first 4 posts!


@Mandelsage - Part One.
@Insideoutlet - Part Two.
@Lilyraabe - Part Three.
@Mandelsage - Part Four.




The Woman Who Moved | Part 5


The woman in red stepped onto the rough wooden floor of the room and pulled a circular, golden pendant with a single, opalescent stone out from beneath her heavy wool robe.


“I can take his time” she said. I didn’t know what she meant. Her icy blue eyes pierced me with a studied intensity. “Do you want to know why you’re here? What this means?”

I looked at the scene before me, the man and girl frozen in a grotesque masquerade of familial affection, and nodded silently. “Come” she said, reaching down to take my hand and leading me from the room. She led me back up the ladder-like stairs through the trapdoor in the kitchen, stopping to pour us both a cup of tea and slathering freshly baked buns with homemade jam and butter, before sitting down at the small, freshly scrubbed kitchen table.

I sat across from her, picking up a cup in a familiar, comforting gesture as I watched her bite into a bun with pleasure, analyzing me as she chewed in small, precise bites.

Finally, she spoke. “My name is Ygrid and I am the Time Keeper in this place. My time is coming to an end and I have been watching you, Fala, I believe you are meant to be next.”


“In this land, Time has always been a commodity of sorts. Time itself is a form of energy that can be distributed, and used, by those who know how to Keep it. In our early days, before industrial advancement, Time was what powered our people and our city. The strongest Keepers were able to manipulate time at their will, changing events and circumstances to suit their own agendas.”

“But Time has changed, other powers have grown stronger, and humankind has new ways of powering our society and civilization. The Keepers are almost all gone now, I am the last in this City, and now you will replace me.”

I stared at her, dumbstruck. Even after spending months alone in a world where Time was frozen, I had never imagined I would hear something like this.


“The man, in the basement, I can take his time.” Again, she pulled out the pendant, as I looked closely I could see that the stone was alive, swirling with a thousand colors that changed as I stared. “A Keeper keeps time--meaning we can distribute it, take it, stop it, or move within it. Controlling Time gives you limitless power, power that can lead to darkness if it is abused.” Her hand shot out and grabbed mine as she said this, her eyes boring into mine seeking an answer.

“I understand” I murmured, matching her gaze for gaze. Since I had seen the frozen tableau downstairs my skin had been tingling with a sense that everything was about to change. As I listened to her words, something rang true within my soul and although I cannot give you a reason why, in that moment I believed Ygrid with all my heart.

“There is no longer a place for Time Keepers to rule this land, or our city. The times have changed. But the Keepers have continued to watch, and to use our powers for good when we can. The man downstairs--I can take his time--all that is left. When time starts again, he will simply pass from this plane, a body with no more time left to walk this earth. That is our duty as Keepers now.”

I sat, studying her face, my stomach writhing. The scene below was horrifying, yet I was suddenly all to aware of my god-like power to set the fate of a man with no jury to hear his trial. Yet, the stakes were too high. I simply looked at her and said, “Take his time.”

Without another word she stood, and walked to the trapdoor, her eyes meeting mine, once, before she climbed below. I sat at the table, my hands simultaneously cold and sweaty, my stomach in knots. The clatter of the trapdoor brought my eyes back to focus. Ygrid climbed up, settling the trapdoor with care with her face a mask of studied composure.


“It is done,” she said simply, sitting at the table. When Time starts again he will have none left. We looked at each other in silence. “Come, let us leave this place,” she said. “I imagine you have a million questions, but first there is something I must show you.”

We stood and I watched as Ygrid strolled through the door ahead of me, stopping before following her to look once more around the bright, neatly scrubbed kitchen and the warm face of the mother baking. I cannot say that I felt at peace with my decision to take Time then; and the imprint of that brightly lit room will stay with me for the rest of my life.

I walked out the door to find Ygrid standing on the cobblestone path leading into the city, tapping her foot impatiently. “Come!” she said, “You have much to learn!”



Want to find out what happens next?
@InsideOutlet will have Part 5 ready for you soon!

Don’t forget to check out:
@Mandelsage - Part One.
@Insideoutlet - Part Two.
@Lilyraabe - Part Three.
@Mandelsage - Part Four.

Check out more of my work:
I just went to prison for 5 months. Again. | 03
ART MIX-UP CONTEST | 02
ART DIGEST | 01


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Oooh, I didn't expect to see the woman in red back so soon, and speaking! ^^ ... Can't wait to know what happens next... @insideoutlet? =)

Dun dun dun...

Looking forward to seeing where it goes! :)

On to it guys :) Sorry been crazy week, I'm starting it tonight but will probably finish it up tomorrow night as its already late and I just finished work... I am glad to see the woman in red back, we have a lot to do :)

Yay @insideoutlet! Weren’t you just away on a trip tho, so no worries!? Hope you had fun!

Ooh good stuff - can it really be wrapped up in one more episode, or will you go another round?

I think there will be two more “episodes”? I don’t know if it could be done in just one more, haha.

@lilyraabe found this part myself!! I think she could have saved the situation in a better, less manipulative tone. The story was fantasy from the start but now it's like that TEN FOLDS.

Now I started to think that she isn't older than the rest of the world now by only 2 years.