BITCOLLECT . Johny Shorts in the Park

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EXT. BEAUTIFUL PARK ON A HILL BY THE BEACH - DAY

Everything is perfect. Nothing is wrong Sun is in the blue clear sky. No chemtrails or clouds or bullshit.

Perfect clean green patches of grass along boulevards of shimmering pavement. Trees blowing in the Pacific Breeze.

A statue of some sort of white rock at the bottom of the steps. A shelter made of spruce at the top.

The locals wander through carrying babies and phones, dogs and coffee. Bicycles, Air Guitars. Designer clothes on clean pressed families with just the right number of androgynous kids. God damn beautiful people. It’s a beautiful day in the park ya dig.

Johny hits the park. Shows up with his typewriter and a bucket of shit and starts looking around for a place to sit. Couple of hobos sunning on the south hill, maybe not. Another bum looks like he’s having a weekend at Bernie’s on a bench up the South Hill no thanks. How about that wet ass bench about half way?

BENCH

Looks good. Nobody here. Kind of a view of the Pacific. Kind of in the shade. Just fine except for this wet ass bench. Johnny wipes it off. Will it dry?

Sure, but first Johnny's gotta hit the Johnny quick.

EXT. SHELTER UP THE HILL - EARLIER

Johnny looks around. He checks the bathroom door. It opens. Sweet, nobody’s home. He spins and drop a shorts- BANG BANG BANG Dammit Johnny someone’s at the door.

The guy knocks BANG BANG BANG!

Johnny Flushes the Johnny.

    VOICE

Everyday these guys

BANG BANG BANG

The guy knocks BANG BANG BANG!

Johny opens the door. Nobody looks embarrassed. Johny limps to the wet ass bench.

BACK AT THE BENCH

He wipes it off. He looks around. Jesus H Fucking Muhamad what a morning already.

INT. COFFEE PLACE - EARLIER

Shit ass coffee at what the fucks with jack hammers in the wind.

EXT. PACIFIC BEACH - EARLIER, BUT AFTER COFFEE

Loud ass morning by the Pacific. Johny just trying to get a little walk by the water, tractor vans raking the sand!

EXT. PARK NEAR THE BEACH - YOU GET THE PICTURE

Thought he had a place to sit somewhere else, starts to sit when he senses it. He looks up to see a drifty little kid chugging towards him. He doesn’t look up so parents won’t worry but the kid keeps bobble heading on.

    PARENT

Donny.  Don. Donny.  

Donny Honey Don.  Donny...

Johnny keeps his head down. The thick haired toddler drools wide eyed as it waddles forward. Big boy.

    PARENT

Donny.  Don. Donny.

Donna stops, plops on her butt, and picks at the grass.

Johny doesn’t move. Donny looks up with her stupid doe eyes. Baby nostrils sniffs, SNEEZE. Johny doesn’t move.

The Parent squats next to Donna,

    PARENT

Bum bum bum, 

run run run.

Parent picks the baby up and whisks her away. Johnny sighs a relief, and turns his dumb fat ass up towards the hill and the park.

BACK AT THE WET ASS BENCH

He wipes the last bit enough sit. He shakes off his weird morning, full of failure looking for a place to sit. He can’t help but look at his phone a second and see no money in his FOREX account. Even without a position, the number is slowly going down.

BEACH - NIGHT

Johny under a bridge bundled up in the cold morning mist. The glow of his phone about his stupid dopey face. His face does not look good. He’s ugly but he does not look happy about something on the phone. Johny trembles back the words he wants to scream. The wind and the waves wash away the light.

BENCH

Big ass looser on a wet ass bench. He sits. He takes a deep breath. Looks around.

BEACH - DAWN

Johny standing over his shit. His crybaby face on the horizon of crashing ocean. Park and beach and a boy is wandering ahead of Johny. Johny doesn’t look at him as the body bobs around in the shadows to the sounds of spray paint cans.

Johny stares at the water.

    JOHNNY

He’s not walking towards me

The body in the dark starts walking directly at Johnny.

    JOHNNY

He’s walking towards me.

The guy walking up to him carries an arm full of spray paint bottles and a scooter over his shoulder. He’s dressed in an oversized Mickey Mouse Meme T Shirt. He stops directly in front of Johnny.

    MICKEY MOUSE T

You a murderer?

    JOHNNY

  (shivering)

What? 

    MICKEY

You got a lighter?

    JOHNNY

It’s a shit lighter.

Johnny hands the guy a lighter and the guy struggles to light it.

    JOHNNY

Shit lighter.  Cheers.

    MICKEY

Cheers?  I can have it?

    JOHNNY

You want my shit lighter?

    MICKEY

I got killer weed. Here’s your

lighter.  I wanna steal a 

phone. Hey man!-

Johnny has flinched.

    MICKEY (cont)

I wasn’t trying to.  For the 

music-

    JOHNNY

Well then get a radio.

Nobody has anything on a phone

except what time obey slave-

    MICKEY

I was being serious, you don’t     

have to shoot me down.

    JOHNNY

I’d feel bad you made 

someone feel bad, then feel

bad cause it don’t work.  You want

a Radio, radio is Real!

    MICKEY

Easy Johny-

    JOHNNY

Everybody want a dream,

nobody want-

    MICKEY

OK Johnny gotta go

    JOHNNY

They’re chipping away at

all things intuitive.

    MICKEY

Yeah I dunno, buh bye, I’m 

going to the thing.

Guy in the T Shirt zooms away on his scooter with Johnny’s lighter. Johnny fights back the feels.

    JOHNNY

  (pathetic)

ok buddy good talkin to ya 

BACK AT THE BENCH

Johnny sits his stupid fat ass on the wet ass bench. Fucking douchebag.

Checks his bucket of shit quick. Reaches in and takes out a little black bag. He reaches in and reveals a hand full of blinking blue rice. He stashes it back in his bag, then stuffs the bag deeper in shit.

Then he lifts up his shirt. A bloody bandage around his gut. A bulge held in by bandages. He covers the wound.

He sits there a minute and takes a breath, thinks he can think a minute. Starts to have a memory, starts to have the feels...

Around the corner comes another bum, bundled in black blankets. Johny doesn’t notice, then he notices.

    JOHNNY

  (defeated)

Oh no.

The other bum walks closer up the hill. He looks up through dark beard and big dark brown eyes, dirty white face. His gaze on Johnny.

Johnny looks down at his feet. The dark bum walks up behind Johnny. Johnny looks for the horizon. The bum looks at Johnny as he sits directly behind him.

Johny looks around the park. The bum in the sun, the Bernie on a bench, people still sniffing the air for homeless to lurk on, a bunch of other trees without benches. Plenty of places to-

The bum has has laid out his socks, shoes, and a tupperware container full of what the fuck. He unwraps himself, and rewraps himself in a large black blanket. He looks at Johnny the whole time. Johnny looks more and more defeated.

Finally Johnny stands up, picks up his bucket of shit and his typewriter. He turns slowly towards the bum who is done doing whatever he was doing with that tupperware.

Johnny looks up into the heavens, looking for Jesus. The other bum looks like Jesus. Jesus Bum. What ya gonna tell Jesus Bum, Johny?

    JOHNNY

You’re a fucking piece of shit

and you know it. 

Jesus Bum takes a deep breathe like he just heard the Gettysburg Address, then nods like a sheriff done his duty at noon. SNEEZES THREE TIMES! Then he lays down and goes to sleep.

Johnny Shorts waits, then waddles his stupid fat wet ass down the hill with his typewriter and his bucket.

People with dogs wander past the bum sleeping on the ground, but closer and closer to Johnny passing by. The dogs restrain the owners from getting a sniff too close. Their teeth shine like bone behind curled up quivering pumped lips.

Johnny wanders down the hill, onto the sidewalk, then pads around the corner out of sight. Johnny’s gone. The people look relieved. The bum snores.

Green Grass, Beautiful Trees blowing in the Big Blue Sky Breeze.

BLACKOUT

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BITCOLLECT

original screenplay copy written on steem blockchain

Cowboy & the Pelican

Opening

Sister & the Cowboy

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APPRECIATION AND SUPPORT,

jacob ts

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