PREMATURE MARRIAGE. (Love or Necessity?)

Leaving my country with my partner was a determining factor for not feeling lonely at some point of my life being outside the borders of my country. However, many people venture abroad completely alone, having to deal many times with loneliness and longing.

Photography by: @miguelarocha (Howth, Ireland)
Nikon D3300

While in Ireland, during my years as an English student, I had the opportunity to live with couples and single people. Those who in equal conditions, went out in search of opportunities. I suppose that in the case of the lasts it is more complicated when life turns cloudy and there is no one at home waiting for them to lend a hand or an ear to be heard at the moment of wanting to vent all the sorrow of everyday life. Although life for couples on many occasions is not much easier than for single people living in different countries of the world, because if you do not have a relationship strong enough to start living as a couple, it is better to think twice before making a big decision as leaving our countries with that person to which we surely have not linked at all after a short time period.

I had almost three years of relationship when I took that plane to Europe, just over four years ago. After the first years of living separately, the ideal thing was to move together to start decreasing expenses while we were still getting to know each other’s personalities and began to establish a closer and stable relationship living together.
In this way I discovered that life as a couple is not easy. Coexistence takes us to unthinkable limits, and even to breaking ties that we believe strong. When that is the case, it is important to have patience, be aware, communicate efficiently and leave individuality aside, and if we have to make sacrifices to strengthen these ties that we fear to break, then it will be necessary to stand some situations that although are uncomfortable, we must be able to communicate as soon as possible.

In my case, we began to live together from the first day we set foot in the Irish capital and the problems began a few weeks after. Laughter became screams and we distanced a lot when suddenly I realized that I was losing interest in my partner.
After a year and millions of fights the situation between us was unsustainable, to the point of having to break up for a few months. Time in which I started dating another person as an escape from the uncomfortable situations that awaited me at home. Of course, this did not get us on the right track and after a while we decided to fix differences, to communicate a lot more and stop hiding obvious human needs. Spending more time together and good communication helped us to resume our relationship.
Now after 7 years, we still continue living together and with emotional stability.

Photography by: @miguelarocha (Dublin, Ireland)
Nikon D3300

You should not stop being who you are and of course to not deprive yourself of liberties when starting a daily but premature cohabitation with your partner. It is important that we have a very open mind and know that we must be prepared to know the other side of that person we thought we knew.

Always remember that your partner was not planning to live with you at this point in his/her life either. After all, it is not a marriage. You have as much freedom as you thought you had before you started living with him or her. Go out, have fun, meet people, share, feel free, know the surroundings, but above all, take care of your manners and remember that although it was not planned, there will always be someone at home waiting for you, and that living in that way is much easier than for many single people who are completely alone in an unknown country. Because money issues, little emotional support and poor physical and mental health can be really difficult to overcome while being alone. Trust that person who is with you as long as you feel comfortable with that presence, but also remember that actually we never get to know a person completely.