[Zuton] : Ice pops (2)
The amber of the sun reflects back across the water. There isn’t much to do, except sit around and soak up the atmosphere. Me and my sister, are sitting on one of our old beach towels, talking about shells.
Parents are finally at some peace with each other and the siblings are getting along. How long does this usually last for? We both know that this summers day won’t last forever.
My mother shouts over to me.
I’m sure she can see on my face, that I couldn’t give a flying fuck about getting ice pops. I think this is the first time I’ve sat down all day.
My sister pipes up and offers to go, which is ideal. Although, I think it was partly the urge younger folk get when they see an opportunity to do something new.
It’s funny. No more than 10 seconds after she hands Sia the Commcast, the bickering and arguing begins. Brilliant. Maybe I’m to blame, maybe I don’t do enough, maybe I’m not what they hoped for and I’m the negative in the family.
I close my eyes. I can feel the sunlight warming my eyelids, and for a moment, I was able to tune them out.
As she skips along, without a care in the world, She did not see the ravens atop the van. Looking at her. Her mind was on the big ice cream truck at the top of the hill.
Sia runs through the sand as she approaches the top of the hill. She hates the feeling, in her feet, when the sand turns to asphalt. The pathway is cold and far too rough for soft feet, but the ice pops are calling out to her and she can’t wait to pay for something for the first time.
Commcast still gripped firmly in her hand, she runs up to the ice cream truck and looks to the guy waiting to serve her. He is sweating profusely, and scratches at the salty drops of perspiration beading on his forehead. There's a sinister vibe to him, and he is bouncing around the truck as if he were a pinball in a machine. The hangover from last night still clings to his addled brain as he leans forward to take the girl's order.
He holds out the Commcast receiver and Sia holds out the device to pay.
The man swears inwardly as “Thank you mister” is his safe phrase and cannot choose a victim if they show politeness. It is one of his quirks as a serial killer.
With such small hands, it’s quite difficult to hold onto the ice pops without more of less hugging them. The blue stains the whitet-shirtt she is wearing and the coldness is not nice in the slightest. With the ice pops secure, and the Commcast loosely on her wrist.
She turns around.
The white noise of my parent's relentless squabbling soon turns to a shouting match and it isn’t long before it’s too difficult to drown it out. I pay no attention and continue to enjoy the feeling of the sunlight on my eyes.
It’s funny. Much like the great feeling of sitting with the family, making the most of the time when it’s content, I never truly make the most of it because I’m always worrying about when it will all inevitably be over. Much like the shade cast, from the sun behind the clouds.
Maybe, I just need to appreciate it more when it’s…….
The ice pops drop from Sia’s hands, as she looks up at the sky. She can’t even feel them crash onto her bare feet.
In the same second the ice pops leave her hands, the beam leaving the floating mass in the sky causes her to cover her eyes. The second, second... changes her life forever.
All code blocked pieces of text are open for interaction. If you have a suggestion and would like to see some different text within the code blocks, leave your comment below. When the next part is uploaded, the edits will be finalized.
Also, suggestions and ideas for the next part are appreciated and considered.
< "Oh no."
ahhhhh. ok i DO see now. hehehee
hmmm ok how should i suggest... i think i'll make the ice cream man more sinister ;)
As she skips along, without a care in the world, the dying whine of the broken speakers on the ice cream truck bores tiny pinholes into her eardrums...
... looks to the guy waiting to serve her. He is sweating profusely, and scratches at the salty drops of perspiration beading on his forehead. His dirty nails leave streaks of muck as the grime mixes with his sweat. There's a sinister vibe to him, and he is bouncing around the truck as if he were a pinball in a machine. The hangover from last night still clings to his addled brain as he leans forward to take the girl's order.
...The man rolls his eyes and spits onto the floor of the ice cream truck with disgust, irritated for the service of such a well-mannered person.
Wow, that is a total game changer! This is the kind of response I was looking for tbh, shifting dynamics and creating the universe!
I'll edit it in before I make the next one, also the last one wasn't edited yet. I think it's staying the way it is :)
hahahahaha yeah... you know how i feel about controlling the universe ;) Writers hold all the power of the entire universe in the tips of their fingers...
hmmmm i like what i just said - i'll have to use that in a post hehehe
Very well said! Definitely, need to get that wrote down for future use :D
I fell in love with photo you chose for this post. The colour of the water is gorgeous. I am not familiar yet with the rules for this open interaction type of writing.
I'm glad you liked it. Well whatever is inside the grey highlighted code blocks can be changed and suggested by the commenters. It can change the dynamic of the story and could lead to a different story further down the line.
It's just to give the audience a say in how the story goes. This is the second part, if you want to check out the first one you can click the link at the bottom of the post.
As she skips along, without a care in the world, She did not see the ravens atop the van. Looking at her.
She did not feel the bloodlust behind his eyes. There’s a predatory vibe from him and he is bouncing about the ice cream truck like he is expecting his next victim.
The man swears inwardly as “Thank you mister” is his safe phrase and cannot choose a victim if they show politeness. It is one of his quirks as a serial killer.
Oooooo dark! I'm going to mix up some of the suggestions from yourself and @dreemsteem. I'm unsure whether or not to carry on this story for part 3 or to skip back to part 1 and revisit this later...
I'm glad there is some responses though, it's going to be interesting to see where Sia ends up!
I loved this. I enjoyed how the ice-cream man is sinister - as readers, we do not feel as safe in this world. There is something going on. I did leave you a bunch of messages with some opinions on this.
Those were my audiences inputs which have turned out really good! It's added a deeper element to the story and gets you thinking something bad is happening with the ice cream man, then it's something else entirely.
Yeah - I read the other comments afterwards. They came up with some great ideas and it truly worked!