'My Friend Ren' > Collection of Poems > Sick Vol. 9

robyneggs (66)in #poetry • 7 years ago

Robyn Eggs and Toast Presents:

"My Friend Ren" - Sick Volume 9

by
Robyn Eggs
with a sprinkling of love...

1rst EDITION. October 7th, 2017

PUBLISHED BY:
Robyn Eggs and Toast
robyneggsandtoast @ gmail.com

My Friend Ren
Sick Volume 9
Copyright © 2017 by Robyn Eggs
All Rights Reserved. Not for reproduction or republication.
*Expressly written permission may be obtained from the publisher (at the above email address) for personal use. A 50 STEEM deposit will be required.

I Want Them
Song
When I Came Home
Life
How I Absolutely
My Favorite Place
Love (A Letter)
Hatred vs. My Thoughts
Dream Friends
Is That My Mind
I’ll Howl Until
Hermits
A Picnic in The Sky
Burning Lakeside
Lips
No Longer
A Sickness
Surely Happy
The Light
Tortoise
The Bunny
My Friend Ren
He is My One, My Only
I Lied
Cry Yourself a River

No. 1 - I Want Them

I want them and I want you
Who is it that they want but you
You are, oh, who are you?
Once again and once more, you

I know someone has been here-
Where are you?
I know that you have been here
For I can taste the air of you

You, oh one who has cried…
Where have you gone and where will you be
Once the ocean has dried up and died
And everything has gone away from me?
by @robyneggs

No. 2 - Song

Mom sent me home with a
Potted plant, some pinto beans,
And a dolie. I wish I was me.
I wish you could see
The mediocrity;
The mundane
Once I was far away from here
Once upon a time my dreams were obscure
But now they’re here
Now they’re a part of me
They’re a part of the mediocrity

Some may stay outside
While other look in
Some may stay and stand aside
While subtle signals play

(Repeat)
by @robyneggs

No. 3 - When I Came Home

When I came home tonight
I wanted to draw
Something I saw in my head
But I could not
As the pain of it was still near
The pain of my tears, stinging
And my nostrils raw from blowing-
We had drawn
Together
ii
I don’t even remember what he wrote for me!
It was too much for me to handle
To even look at it and know (read) it
Why? Why can’t I handle it?

I’m so afraid of being hurt again
And now I’m afraid of my actions
by @robyneggs

No. 4 - Life

I love you more than life itself
Life itself
Is nothing worth
The time it takes to notice worth
Itself
Life…
When will you come back to me
How will you be there
When I need you there?
ii
Oh yhes,
That may be
But how,
How will you see me?
How will you see me when I’m dead
And when I’m gone will I ever
Will I ever be like Poe
Like Poe?
iii
I see me
Inside you
Inside me
Dan
Dirty Dan
Where have I been
When I’ve been gone
I’ve been gone to the Goose
There and back again
There was the party and then…
And then there you were
There you were
New Years' has come and gone
You have come
And left me for the last time
I suppose,…
But surely,
You have left me forever…
by @robyneggs

No. 5 - How I Absolutely

How I absolutely devour
You into me
Change and become my dreamer
Crazy and I love you
Forever searching and becoming more of
What was wanted to be found
How I loved you as never before
And always
Be seemingly coldness of lumpy heart
On my palm elucidating beyond
What I can do to help you
Beholden the thoughts swarming about
My body covering yours inside clouds of ideas
Believing in one another; thrown down
Upon the glass, bed of roses all white
And shimmering
I could have loved 100 men-before I loved
You and still loved you as Great because
Love is endless; endlessly bountiful
The fragile nothingness of myself upon
The rocks
To bring it out into the closed expanse
Of my feelings
by @robyneggs

No. 6 - My Favorite Place

Falling all around are
Trees of ebony and fire
Wind silences as I present
Everything goes black as tar
I’m beginning to perspire
And I feel hesitant

This place brings me such joys
Each thing nicer than the next
Now there lays an open field
The flowers perfectly poised
Swans with long, white necks
Nothing moves; all will yield

I’m a Princess here
They all treat me fine
And upon a platter
Food is brought forth
I visit my favorite place in my mind
Speaks the Swan, “I recommend the latter”
by @robyneggs

No. 7 - Love (A Letter)

Love,
To me love is like a flower
Growing by the sea
Love is like the rain
Sprinkling on your flower
Like a shower
Growing by a tower
Mingling with a bee
This flower, can it smell?
Smell like heaven’s garden
This love is a friendship
Ringing like a bell
Please beg my pardon
I must be standing by our wishing well
Love, however, is like a flower
And so our friendship must grow
If you disagree just tell me so
by @robyneggs

No. 8 - Hatred vs. My Thoughts

Lost in my thoughts
Searching in this confusion
While my idea rots
From hatred’s intrusion
Grasping for my existence
In this misty mind
Fighting against resistance
Which I cannot find
Where does hatred lurk?
It seems I’ve tried every corner
And still he smirks
Leaning over me like a mourner
I cry out
From the desperation
And shout
For my restoration
Wandering through my brain
Like one lost in a maze
I slowly become my insane
I’m lost in a misty daze
Hatred stole my essence away
Finally my mind fell
And in the next day
I was but a shell
A case holding no life
Hatred only a passion
Against which strife
Hath no assassin
by @robyneggs

What I’m feeling is relenting and so self-fulfilling-
And who am I entrusting to but fate and smoke?
So what if my poetry is mediocre
It applies
iii
The universe is inside my throat
Drink me down
The sky is falling down my throat
Keep on calling
Forceps to hold my tongue
The damage will be undone
And soon I will fall down
Soon I will become
What is there left to see with our eyes but mediocrity
What is perfect but the hypocrisy?
The obscurity
iv
The night sky is at the end of my bottle
I can see it obscured by the glass
I am thinking of times past
Who was the one I loved
She has yet to be erased
Can I forgive her
Can I justify her case?
I don’t think so for that time was erased
v
She walks along
I drift off in song
Down the road we meet up
What haven’t I thrown up?
My mind is in the air
And I can hear the whispers of her hair
Sinful is the sound
Touching the ground, I bend over her
by @robyneggs

No. 10 - Is That My Mind?

Is that my mind looking back at me
Is this the other side of the looking glass
Have I gone mad or just sighed at last?
A deep sigh
A placid view of what’s outside
And a quiet lullaby
To theme things gone by
by @robyneggs

No. 11 - I’ll Howl Until

I’ll howl until the moon goes down

I can feel my skin burning at night
The intense heat of the day
Has completely taken over me now
And I howl

Where have I been?
And where am I now?
Deep inside of me
There roars the sea

On and on and on it roars
It roars like the smashing of oars
And as it pulls at my skin
I begin to sink again

My body heat intensifies
The moon goes down with my body
I am I am drifting away from the surface
As I drown in the howling and disgrace

I’ll howl until the moon goes down
by @robyneggs

No. 12 - Hermits

I am sore all over
My body can’t handle
And joyous snowtops
Where I am a hermit
Smooth me out like
Unraveling Russian carpet
Beautiful colors
Then the hermit sings
And by the sea
We’ll sit down to tea
The mountains
Where I am alone
I came down because of
All the hermits in the sea
I am old
My body can’t handle
Building clouds
And little work
Yet I am sore
Seashells of mountains
In the mists they rise
Down float clouds to
Collect the sea
And the hermits
by @robyneggs

No. 13 - A Picnic in the Sky

A picnic in the sky
Looking over the town
We’ll spread the blanket up high
So we do not drown
In the sea of fake people
The clouds wash up
As we sit over the peopled lake
And here we’ll sup’
Conversation up above
Talk of politics and of bicycling
Talk of the weather and of love
Our watermelon and thoughts mingling
Soon the clouds
Will calm down
And we’ll float back down below
And hope the town
Of fake people won’t know
by @robyneggs

No. 14 - Burning Lakeside

Burning lakeside and lips
Longingly belonging
Patiently incessant
Become peculiar to some
Heartfelt caution
Distractingly benign
Brain damage of a bat
Nightly searching
Gaspingly drowned
Senselessly converted
Fire talks and it’s strange
Goodly strange---
---While at night you’re sleeping---
You’re turning it into something else
by @robyneggs

No. 15 - Lips

Lips telling something
Strange
Beware of nice
Disguises
Find the disguises
Before you’re lost or
Changed
by @robyneggs

No. 16 - No Longer

Yet as I am no longer
Do I sit upon the couch and
Listen to words not making any
Sense the flowers
Like milk and honey
He speaks
Opening new worlds with his
Voice my opinions I shall
Withdrawing and the lack
Of time
Lost
ii
Listless, shriveled upon the floor
Lo!
There he stands like magic
And because the trees bend
Listening I hear the truth
He has come because I ask
Retrieves like a dog
Chewed like his toy, left
Yet obedient
I know you wouldn’t do that to me
Hah! I know no longer
by @robyneggs

No. 17 - A Sickness

Apart life doesn’t continue
It lays down, stagnant
When I see you again it bubbles over
It becomes a waterfall through my fingers
--Taken
Taken away and left without you
You’re as essential as water to me
And I carry these feelings inside of me
They want to get out
I’ll shrivel away and die without you
If these monsters don’t come out
The tree of life has decayed
With nothing left to feed it
Clouds turn black
Ripping at me
And as oceans churn—
A silent whore creeps along the branches
Bringing me back my feelings
by @robyneggs

No. 18 - Surely Happy

I am surrounded
By swarming thoughts
Circling around
Myself
So
I
Get up
And slowly search
Soon I’ll find Sammy
Then become surely happy
Indeed
by @robyneggs

No. 19 - The Light

As the light encompasses me
Like music drifting in
From over the ocean
I am thinking about myself
The light comes from
Even unexpected places
Places like
My knowledge seeping through
The rocks underneath and
Sweeping from the skies around me
Soaring like waves crashing on
My sides-the light mingles with
My thoughts, creating
A warm, glowing color
by @robyneggs

No. 20 - Tortoise

There was tortoise
Old and wise and becoming
With long silver claws
Just so happened to be summoning
A pair of pearly jaws
For it had no teeth
And in its sleep one day
In the pond under a rock
It did say to the sun ray
With its mouth like chalk
“Yay!”
by @robyneggs

No. 21 - The Bunny

Dipping in the spoon
To receive the honey
I hum a sweet tune
And spread over the bunny
Its white with the honey
Unscrewing the cork
To relieve the wine
I take a silver fork
And slide over the spine
White honey with silver wine
by @robyneggs

No. 22 - My Friend Ren

My friend Ren
Listens
While I float to the surface
Spilling out my thoughts
From the big dipper in the sky
Listens
To my experiences
Bubbling out my pores
While I waste away thin
by @robyneggs

No. 23 - He is My One, My Only

Sinking in sand
Mediocre friction
An addiction to neutrality
Crystal meth and plastic intuition
ii
Mountains of ecstasy
Emerge efflorescent
Into the light, underwater
Where the fishes give kisses
To their selves, effervescent
iii
Fly into me and regard
The one standing there
With his hand in his pocket
To find what?
Now over to where he is
Against the wall
You see? Then I knew him
As you flew out of me into we
iiii
Mediation
Revelation
Here he comes
Here he’ll go
And there I am - I’m going…
I’m losing, wasting wants and wanting sins

Where was he when I was him?
Where were we when I had him?-
I feel as if I've known him
Time and time again
iv
Meditation
Reveals reality
There I was inside him
And when he was made I was him
Him inside of me
And where will we be?-
Where will he be when he’s inside of me?

I’m wasting revelation on wanting sins...
Patience
Surrender
Hold me tender, hold me warm, hold me long
Just hold onto me
You are there beside me
vi
Ah, the peak of the mountain…
I have reached the peak of the mountain after many twists and turns and rambling roving
He is my one, my only
by @robyneggs