Self-worth can be measured by friendships, money, power and personal self-control. Be careful where you place the most value, because given enough impetus, you’ll likely see it come to fruition.

I recently met best-selling author, Matthew Reilly at a function celebrating the launch of his latest book, “The Three Secret Cities”. I admire his dedication to storytelling and aspire to work as hard to reach my own personal writing goals.

The trajectory of the mind, and resultantly, the trajectory of the life course of the body must be kept in continual control and self-correction just as a race car driver makes ongoing, precise and deliberate movements of his hands guiding the car, lap after lap to take first place. Daily practice is necessary in order to seize control of the mind and all its tendencies to avoid work, seek shallow pleasures and loaf in comfort. It is its own worst enemy and must be wrestled with daily to cultivate success and true fulfilment.

Shallow Comforts or Deep fulfilment?

Our minds have a subtle way of slipping all too easily into comfort and allowing our physical selves to miss fantastic opportunities for growth and achieving so much more. I’ve recently made a commitment to myself to make the move from the passenger seat to the driver’s. I absolutely do not profess that the this information is original, however I have taken my own approach in imbuing it with my own voice to transmit my understanding of concepts that have made many a prosperous human being. The knowledge has come from a range of sources, including those who are not only successful engineers and strategists of their own lives, but were humble enough to have engaged a mentor and accepted the need to trust others who really do have your best interests at heart. After all, the success of individuals within a society depend upon the success of those around you.

Rethink Your Thinking [And Acting].

Here are the top seven ways to recognise if you’re slipping into comfort and forgoing the more fulfilling things in life (It was going to be ten; refer to number six in the list).

1. When you get home from work, you prefer to have a glass of wine and watch some Netflix.

The late Jim Rohn, successful salesman, business entrepreneur and public speaker told a story of a man, that when asked how much his television cost him, replied, “Four hundred and fifty dollars.” He was startled to hear that the real cost of ownership was not the upfront cost, but the cost of wasted hours doing nothing meaningful or productive with one’s life. Mr Rohn estimated that the preceding twelve months of use of that television cost the man at least $12,000 in lost income.

Hayley and I do own a television. It’s a pretty big one, too. Luckily for us, we were gifted it by a very generous friend and ex-colleague of Hayley’s. And of course, we both enjoy Netflix from time to time. The point that should be well understood here, is that these sorts of passive forms of entertainment should be appreciated judiciously. Just as one shouldn’t eat cake and other heavily refined foods for the better part of the day, it isn’t wise treating your own time (and growth potential) the way a person with poor self-control and dangerous eating habits treats the lining of their arteries.

For the past 11 days, all of my screen time (TV, YouTube etc) has been purposeful. I have used it as a small, timed reward for excellence in other aspects of my day, such as achieving a goal that I really didn’t want to do or as a learning tool to better myself. I impose a limitation and respect myself enough to stick to them.

2. You’ve joined a gym (you’ve already pre-empted your upcoming New Year’s Resolution!)

The brilliant news is that you have made a choice to benefit your health! Congratulations! One question you might permit me to ask is,

“What will you use at the gym that you couldn’t do elsewhere, such as sit-ups and push-ups at home, walking around your local park and around natural areas or going for a swim at your local pool or beach?”

Many people decide that going to the gym will be good for them because it is a place dedicated to fitness and improving one’s physical health. Yes, of course it is, if you block your ears while ignorant personal trainers tell you that you must eat plenty of egg whites and drink copious quantities of protein shakes. The equipment there is second to none and you can learn a great deal about yourself and how to keep in shape.

While gyms are a useful tool, they are just that. Getting to the gym can be as monumental a hurdle as resisting the ice cream in the freezer. As flawed individuals, we need to minimise as many of the roadblocks to success as possible until we are more mentally fit, that is, have the mental strength to get up at 5am regularly and avoid the ice cream in the freezer section of the supermarket. Write down what you want to achieve – eg. 45 minutes of walking a day from 5am. When you’ve got it written down, you’ve set the expectation up in your mind. The real challenge is your habits, not the treadmill. When you can consistently wake up at 5 am and walk around the block for 20 minutes, then join the gym. Trust me, doing it this way will save you cash and you'll be both mentally and physically stronger.

3. You’re an attentive listener.

As an educator, I love people who take the time to listen to what I’m saying. I am pretty careful with what I choose to say (most of the time!) and think I’m worth listening to. Listening is a great skill to have and will save you the heartache of making the same mistakes that so many people make time and time again. If only they listened to how not to travel across a desert barefoot! They would have really saved themselves the pain!

I understand, you’re now wondering why being an attentive listener is slipping into your comfort zone, right? Surely, you don’t think I’m kidding. Listening is the opposite of speaking which requires you to formulate ideas, directly address a person or group of people and hold their attention. When I said listening, I was referring to those who sit, nod and “uhhum” in agreeance. Don’t be one of those people. Take a public speaking course, join your local chapter of “Toastmasters” or speak to people regularly about topical issues that you can share. Passivity is your enemy.

4. Work is an important part of your life.

Work is just one aspect of life. It should serve to pay the bills and grow with you to service your greater desires, but only working on work can be very comforting to those workaholics. After all, we all have to work. It’s essential to keep the creditors off your back and to pay for the groceries every week. The question I pose to you, is how often do you work on yourself? Do you challenge yourself in your personal life or when 6pm comes, you flop on the lounge to escape to TV land? These are non-working hours and they are yours to spend freely. Spend the time wisely as time is your most valuable resource.

Spend that time becoming a more attentive partner, friend and son, daughter, brother or sister. Learn from others the advantages of volunteering your time, money or other resources in bettering the lives of others. You’ll certainly be amazed at the wealth of happiness that will come your way when attention moves away from work and yourself to the benefit of others and your own personal development.

5. You love true crime stories.

I feel by now, the pattern is pretty clear. I’m not on the rampage to stop you from reading books. Far from it. You may love non-fiction and that’s perfectly fine. Enjoy the stories and appreciate the time you are using to hone your reading skills.

Number five is all about imagination. Whatever you imagine will be your truth. Napoleon Hill, the author of “Think and Grow Rich” and protégé of Andrew Carnegie said in one of his seminars, if you tell yourself a lie enough times, your brain will begin to process that lie as if it were truth. If a man implants a fictitious thought, a seed if you will, into his subconscious, telling himself a simple (but powerful lie) repeatedly, cultivating its fabrication, it should not come as a surprise that before long the seasoned pilot would no longer feel confident at the controls of the aircraft. The lie? He told himself with conviction, belief and passion that his next flight will crash.

Use your imagination to envision yourself doing wild and amazing things with your life, be the person you want to be. Do you consider yourself timid, unconvincing, weak or bland? Who told you those things? You weren’t born that way, so stop telling yourself those things. The good news is that the subconscious is plastic and can be manipulated. We just need to get past the guard; the conscious mind. If you pester it enough with repetition of new ideas, eventually it’ll wear out and let you through the subconscious. Here’s one quick strategy that I am using;

On flash cards, choose the qualities you want to possess and write them down as “I am motivated”, “I am an athlete”, “I am confident” and so on. You may be an active person, for example, but think of yourself on a lower level compared with someone else who (in your mind) is more fit. You’ll only grow and set yourself up for far grander achievements than walking a few miles a day (maybe a marathon or a challenging hike) if your subconscious already believes you can do it. After all, athletes find climbing mountains easier than everyone else. Do you want to make it easier or harder for yourself?

Do you want to be the person who climbed the peak that no one else thought they could climb so never tried? I want to be that person and you do, too.

6. You would consider yourself a perfectionist.

One may see perfectionism as a positive trait of a person who demands nothing short of the best of themselves. It is a false belief. Think of a baby learning to walk or develop their language skills. Perfectionism in growth and development doesn’t exist in any beneficial form. It only stops you from trying your new skill or craft repeatedly. Each failure is growth. When learning to perform an “in the hands” riffle shuffle (that is often demonstrated by cardists and magicians), you would be unwise in trying to complete the move perfectly the first go. It would be frustrating and likely see you give up sooner than a person who dropped the cards on the bed a hundred times while practicing (pro tip: picking cards up from the bed is much easier than the floor). The learner sees their incremental improvements, which only acts as a motivator to take further risks to achieve final success.

A perfectionist would have gone out of their way to make this list a nice round number. It’s a waste of precious time when I needn’t choose a needlessly high number when seven will do. [Unless your publisher or editor, whom is paying you handsomely, politely asks you to do otherwise!]

7. You have a diary filled with very important meetings and dates [but no journal!]

Keeping a diary is essential. Scheduling is a part of life planning and is very helpful if you’ve got meetings all day. Most professionals cannot live without their diary. It would be career suicide. Is your diary the only book you keep?

Consider keeping an exercise book, quality journal or notepad for recording important life choices and goals you’re working toward. Once you have a definite purpose or goal in mind, written down and revised daily, it becomes a part of your inner action plan. Your daily activities become more focused (even on a level you may not notice) as you are willing yourself to your goals through your actions. Set yourself goals that you think (initially) are out of reach. You’d really like a new car. Set yourself the goal for the top of the line version of the one you like. Write it, repeat it, revisit it throughout the day. Even write the goal on a card and put it in your pocket or wallet or on your home screen on your phone. The more you look at it, the more often your mind is trying to create ways to make this happen for you. Massive action and absolute unwavering self-belief is the key.

A final thought: Comfort is decline.

I want to leave you with a final thought [is this number eight?]. I’ve recently made the commitment to myself to have cold showers for the remainder of the year. And if I can do it for a year, I can do it for longer. If you are uncomfortable doing something, your mind is trying to push you towards the path of least resistance. Travelling from the earth to the moon via a chemically propelled rocket in the 1960’s was the path of most resistance. Why did Russia and the United States bother? Well, JFK put it simply, “not because it is easy, but because it is hard.”

If you want to be like the rest, “comfort” is your friend. I’ve quoted it for a reason. It isn’t really comfort. It is a self-imposed prison preventing you from experiencing life like the 1% do. It’s a sad reality that just a tiny percentage of people have the will and drive to overcome a seemingly instinctual desire to seek the ordinary.

To Your Success,

Nick.

Please UPVOTE this article. Your vote keeps me writing my best content.

All content is original and belongs to @nickmorphew. [15 December 2018]

Disclosure: This article was not a paid promotion and was not self-upvoted. Nor were there any affiliate links.

---

I’m looking for an artist to cover my work on the fantasy saga, Adventures in Elowyn Glade. Click the link!

---

You didn’t think you’d leave here without me shamelessly plugging my other work, right?

Our Trip from Adelaide to Melbourne.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7

Restaurant Reviews (and Tesla Showroom)

[100% VEGAN] Shift Eatery Surry Hills

[100% VEGAN] Matcha Mylkbar, St. Kilda

[100% VEGAN] Lentil as Anything, Newtown

Da Orlando Wood Fire Pizzeria, Wollongong

Kürtősh, Wollongong

Nan Tien Temple, Wollongong

Blank Canvas, Batemans Bay

Tesla Motors, Martin Place

Do you enjoy gory mystery-thrillers?

Two devious, psychopathic minds go head-to-head trying to out-kill one another. Who will die at the hands of the two and how far will it go until the entire state is on the hunt for the duplicitous duo?

Check out The Coroner. Part 1 and Part 2 are linked.

So, you're a Star Wars fan? I almost wasn't.

In a two part micro series, learn of the devious practical joke my uncles played on me as a child. You'll never think of Darth Vader the same way again.

Part 1

Part 2