All your efforts are worth it

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If you keep staying in one place, you will never know the value of comparison; If you only fall in love once, you will not be able to confirm that you have met the true love; If you only work in the same job, you will not be able to guarantee that there is no other possibility in life.

Those roads we walked will not be wasted, those you experiences you gain will not only hurt you, but they will also eventually help you in the complex and uncertain choice, and finally, find the most suitable life for you.

What did the detours in life bring to you? Before I wrote this topic, I talked to two of people, and they all took a detour, and they told me about the impact of the detour.

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Lily, 30 years old, fall in love twice but doesn’t work out. Her last love last for seven years, from the beginning of her degree to Ph.D. and her ex-boyfriend is serious about their relationship; every plan has her in it.

Her ex-boyfriend is a university professor, so originally she intended to find a job after graduated, but because of her boyfriend, she continued to study and planned to be a university professor too. After graduated that year, they broke up because Lily found that her ex-boyfriend has already married.

After the breakup, Lily left the city and went to a cultural company; she has the highest level education in the company, a few days ago she just met a boy, recently on a date.

Lily said that because of the past relationship, she wasted four years to study instead of earning money. Friends around her already have children, and her, simply taking a big detour. I asked Lily, is she regret? She said no regrets; she also said: "Spend a few years to help me see through a person, I don’t think I lose much."

Many people regret after the broke up, regret loves the wrong person; regret because spending several years on something that don’t have results. But this is growth and liberation, through a detour to know what they want, separate is to leave the siege.

You gain the feeling of love and experience, and you cherish a memory, you are about to start moving into a new life. So don't say love wrong let you suffer and hurt, love wrong let you doubt love. Because of love wrong, so that you have the opportunity to meet true love.

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I met a girl called Kelly, and I liked her very much, when I first came to the city, she took me around, find for a cost-effective furniture shop, finds delicious food, she proudly said she spent five years in the city, and already very familiar with the places. At that time I always looked at her with admiration, and she was always hopeful about life and kept her passion in life.

After Kelly graduated, she gave up on the job that her parents arranged for her and came to the city. Every time I talk about her life, Kelly is particularly proud and arrogant, she said: "I love this city, I want to look at all the scenery in the city with my eyes, I want to use my legs to measure every inch of this city, even if it is a crowded MRT, remote work distance, also can not reduce my liking for the city."

At that time I think Kelly is really strong, in her heart, the city existence is really her faith, is a kind of long-term support for her strength.

A few days ago Kelly moved away; she was going back to her hometown. Before she left, she said:"I still love the city, but I can't stay here anymore. I’m here for at least five years; I still can't rent an independent room, nor meet like-minded people. I don’t even have a big breakthrough in my career. I am almost 30; I do not dare to wait, it is more practical for me to go back to mom and dad. People always have to live before they can talk about dreams. "

Before leaving, I sent her to the airport; she said to me in the taxi to insist, must stay, I asked her does she regrets coming to the city, and she said: "No regrets, at least I have come and tried."

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When we were young, we were confined to one side, so we yearned for the vastness of the outside, unwilling to accept the ordinary life, just to find that we are small, and then return to the former ordinary but practical life. A lot of people want to take a detour, already know that there will no result and still insist, stay in hometown may have already had a small achievement, now wasted a few years and back to the starting line again.

But I don’t think those years are wasted; you witnessed a change in the city, you witnessed your changes and growth, you found that you have done a lot of things that you did not think you could do. Even if one day comes back to the starting point, you are not nothing. The insights in you, the confidence in your heart, and the memory of the past few years are always there.

Only after seeing the larger world can make us more cautious in making the best choices so that we are convinced that we have the best arrangements in the present, that we will no longer hesitate, and then move forward more resolutely.

Those love wrong, failed to start a business, and seemingly no struggle, it is not over, it gave you to grow and change, give you the determination. I do not thank the detours because it has let me down, let me frustrated, but I appreciate this detour help me become who I am today, more mature, more strong, more like an adult.

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