seem to have lost my steem-urge... I can't think of anything to write about, and what I do find to write about, nobody reads or votes for.

I am not gone away, I am just tired.

I visited a phone repair shop this afternoon. He wanted to charge me 10€ more than I paid for my phone (in Sofia) just to replace the screen. The dumbass even tried to tell me the digitiser layer is inseparable from the display.

WRONG.

I won't labor myself to show you a video of how to pull the digitiser of a Sony M2 Aqua off, separate it and just replace the nasty cracked capacitative touchscreen. You can find it with one quick search of youtube.

I simply have not the emotional energy right now to continue to try and amuse my dear readers. My life right now is repetitive to the point of infuriating.

Laying quite still, staring at the ceiling, and doing nothing. Woo, next tuesday I have to do some bureaucrap. Maybe it means no money.

I consider it to be a fact that if I am bored with my life, you all will be doubly. I know I could probably scrape enough to get a bus to Budapest, plus fix my phone at a Budapest GSM shop, for the money I was just offered to needlessly replace my working LCD on my phone.

So what do you think I should do?

* * *

I came here to be at SteemFest. Now I miss my tunnel transformator room and the Subway and their nice wifi at NDK. I miss the endless giant bits of pizza people threw away into the bins. I miss the lovely jackets and shoes and nicknacks I found in dumpsters in central Sofia. I even miss that grumpy bastard who hassles me at the outdoor cinema in that park, and his dog walking business.

Going back to where life is not so freaking boring, and, importantly, deeply uninspiring, has risen high on my agenda. The Netherlands is leaving me so unfecund and uncreative I almost want to torture myself to try and stimulate a reaction. I suspect I am not going to be here much longer, and I am past caring if this time I get stuck two days no food in -5 celsius, without sleep, that I will gladly leave behind a popsicle. Better than dying of boredom.

Better that, than to live an empty life of meaningless and senseless routine.

I am putting my phone into a semi safe situation after I make this post. I got nothing new to tell you what you want to read.

I am just in a pit that makes me remember how much I rued staying in Amsterdam the last time, and the amazing array of wrong things that stemmed from this decision. I only stayed here before, for lack of valid government ID. I came partly because I was under the impression I needed to get registered here, and then a new passport issued, to keep my NL citizenship.

Nothing about Amsterdam drove me to visit before. I never wanted to come to the Netherlands. There is so little here that is compatible with me.

I came because too many people while I was in prison old me staying in Bulgaria they would fabricate shit to lock me up again.

After being back there almost 9 months. Nothing.

They put me through a year of relatively undangerous Bulgarian prison, just to win money from Bruxxelles. After that, I am nobody again.

I have never felt the sense of belonging I got from Bulgaria and Serbia from any other place in the world. In my life.

I can't even clearly articulate better than that. It is prevocal, unconscious. I don't really know why I love the Balkans so much. But there I feel more at home, even curled up in a utilty tunnel feet from a 50KW transformer, sleeping at 5 degrees celsius, while above ground -15.

---

We can't stop here! This is Whale country!

_{Loki was born in Australia, now is wandering Amsterdam again after 9 months in Sofia, Bulgaria. IT generalist, physics theorist, futurist and cyber-agorist.}

_{Loki's life mission is to establish a secure, distributed layer atop the internet, and enable space migration, preferably while living in a beautiful mountain house somewhere with a good woman, and lots of farm animals and gardens, where he can also go hunting and camping.}

<sub>"I'm a thoughtocaster, a conundrummer in a band called Life Puzzler. I've flipped more lids than a monkey in a soup kitchen, of the mind."
- Xavier, Renegade Angel</sub>

_{All images in the above post are either original from me, or taken from Google Image Search, filtered for the right of reuse and modification, and either hotlinked directly, or altered by me}