Is It Difficult to Make Friends in CHINA?
Hello Steem Blockchain!
I have made several friends in China, but to be honest, it isn't so easy to do so.
Here is something you need to watch out for when you meet people in China:
Many people are curious about foreigners in this country and are looking to practice their English. That is why so many youth pay top dollar to be taught English by foreigners. English education is a huge business in China.
When people come and talk to you, they will probably ask you the basic questions such as "where are you from?", "do you like China?", "can you use chopsticks?", etc.
This may seem like friendly small talk but a lot of times it isn't. Like I said before, English education is a huge business in China. That is why many people will try to find ways to learn English as inexpensively as possible. What often happens is that people that are trying to talk to you and asking you these questions are simply trying to practice their English.
They often times want to "make friends" with you not because they genuinely think you're awesome, but because if they make friends with you, then they can essentially get free English lessons. I have had this happen to me before.
There was a girl that often times asked me to help her with her English assignments and make corrections to them. I got kind of annoyed helping her all the time so I eventually confronted her on the matter. She hasn't asked me for help ever since.
While I was in the city of Tianjin at an Ancient Culture Street, some university students approached me and told me right off the bat that they want to practice their English. They asked me a few questions and then went on their way. Had they not explicitly stated that they are trying to practice their English, you could have mistaken them for some friendly Chinese people that wanted to make friends with you.
You can definitely make friends in China. You just have to be careful that you aren't making friends with someone that is trying to get free English lessons. Since I teach English here, I don't want to be taken advantage of like that.
The best way to prevent that is to learn Chinese. I speak enough Chinese such that I can converse with people without using much English. That allows me to speak Chinese the majority of the time so that I can at least practice my Chinese lol. If you only speak English sometimes, you will get a better gauge at who your true friends are because if they are trying to practice English, they will stop contacting you because you always speak Chinese. If they don't mind you speaking Chinese 80-90% of the time, then you found someone that just might actually care about you and enjoy your company!
Hope that helps!
Thanks for reading & watching!
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If you are alone, this happens a lot, especially in tourist areas.
I haven't had those awkward conversations in years though, I don't have patience for people who ask inane questions, like "Do you like Chinese food?"
I'm fortunate that most of my friends speak halfway decent English, or are fellow expats.
One advantage in northern China, is that most people speak Mandarin well enough that its easier to understand, the farther south you go, the more difficult it gets.
Shanghainese, Cantonese, and lots of other local dialects, makes conversation more difficult. (for me anyway)
Yeah the dialects are difficult. I remember when I first arrived in China an expat colleague of mine boasting that he spoke better Chinese than most Chinese. I thought, wow that's pretty arrogant. Once you've been there a while and learned the language you find out that in many situations it's true!
Yup. Go to Guangzhou and you'll find many people that can't speak Mandarin properly.
I live in a city that has one of the hardest dialects in China, they are harder most of the time. But for me my wife is from here (Wenzhou) so its been beneficial and fun to learn. Now I find it easier to make local friends because it breaks down the barriers
You are right. The further down south you go from Beijing, the more dialects and divergence you hear from standard Mandarin Chinese. Eventually you hear nothing but Cantonese at times.
I'd say after 5 years in China, I made 3 genuine Chinese friends who I can hang out with and who don't want something in return other than the pleasure of your company.
Especially in smaller cities you are going to attract those who just want to practice English or perhaps just want to be seen out and about with a foreigner. It's easy for new expats to get caught up in some sort of celebrity mindset when they first arrive and everyone wants a piece of them, only for them to later find out that that interest wasn't really based on them as a person but rather on what they could offer.
Yeah. Many Chinese just want to look "cool" with a foreign friend. Once they find out that we are just normal people, the novelty wears off.
that's awesome man! That's the same way in the Philippines too. People want to talk to you in english to sharpen up haha
Solid video as always. Love the twist transition.
Thanks bro. I'm happy with how that transition turned out.
I have met a lot of Chinese friends, I would say my main group of friends are Chinese rather than foreigners. I think you are right in saying if you mostly communicate in Chinese you will avoid the 'English speaking friend' zone.
I think it's difficult to make friends in China mainly due to language barrier, culture barrier and different upbringings. The real genuine Chinese friends I have now and have known for a long time, where former co-workers of mine or people I met while playing sports.
The common interests are the big part of getting over the language & culture barrier. The other expats I've met, when they have Chinese friends, they seem to have always met while working together or met because of common interests like music, arts, fitness, or language exchange.
Apart from that, sometimes the friendships don't last long because the foreigners here simply don't stay for a long time, go home and lose touch after they stop using Wechat. On another note, some Chinese people are out to only practice English and not trying to build a strong connection.
Unfortunately, most Chinese can't use Facebook or Whatsapp, so If you don't use wechat then will lose touch.😥 Maybe we want to build a strong connection, but sometimes we can't do.😫
That's understood. Once foreigners go back home, Wechat becomes somewhat irrelevant. The longer away from China the lesser it's used. Although when I went back to America I still managed to chat regularly with my Chinese friends on Wechat.
Sometimes I'll talk, lots of times when they ask "where do you come from?" I just reply "China" and carry on walking
I'm looking to teach english in China now that I've graduated from varsity. This has been very fruitful for me @kenanqhd. Do you know the quickiest way for me to get to teaching English in China? I really want to get busy already..
If you have a university degree and are from an English speaking country, go to http://www.eslcafe.com/jobs/china/ and check out the different jobs there. You can also post your resume under www.eslcafe.com/jobs/wanted/ and have people/agencies contact you that way.
That should get you started.
Thank you so much bro..
HI 朋友 也許你對於有人利用你練習免費的英文這件事情感到生氣
也許你該使用中文說話 他們使用英文說話 雙方都可以練習一門新語言 這將成為好事
HI Friends Maybe you are angry at someone who has used your free English practice
Maybe you should speak in Chinese. They speak in English. Both parties can practice a new language. It will be a good thing.
Please forgive me for poor English. I use Google to translate
说的对了。 我喜欢跟他们用中文。 这样，我会知道谁是我的朋友和谁只想免费英语课。
谢谢啊！
Related to career!
When I'm not engaged in this industry I'm happy to help my friend
When I work in the computer industry Some people just want to repair computers for free! However I need to eat (making money)
for free = no talk
Can you read Chinese? I'm afraid there is a problem with the grammar of the translation that leads to poor communication.
我会看懂中文啊。就我自己写。我不用翻译。 不好意思，我的中文语法不完美哈哈
真是太好了 別人寫英文我看翻譯看得懂 我一直很擔心我寫中文翻譯的英文別人看不懂
如果你的中文不錯 如果有空可以來我的國家觀光旅遊
你可以先看看簡短的介紹 主要語言也是:中文
https://steemit.com/travel/@laiyuehta/taiwan-a-great-place-to-travel-the-safest-place-to-visit
我真想去台湾！！ 我也想找台湾工作但是我找不到工作比我的更好
台灣的工作環境真的不夠好
也許你可以存一些錢 來台灣當個小老闆!賺多少由自己決定!!
Thank you for sharing this with us, I was always curious about what my life would be like without my friends from my country and if I could make new friends ... how could I interact with those people and try to enter into trust? There are more timid people for this kind of situations and I think that learning English is fundamental for our social life
It's very easy to make friends if you want to do it.
That is true also.