Go hug your parents!
I decided to write something about being a parent. I have been a mum for over a year and I wanted to share a tiny bit of my experience with you wonderful steemians.
This is a transcript from one of the letters I wrote to my son:
"I remember sitting on my mother's lap, on one of the very few moments of affection we shared. She told me she loved me more than I could understand, and even though I didn't quite know what she meant, I believed her. My mum was never too affectionate, and sweet words or cuddles were hard to come by; but I never doubted her love. A love that, just like she said, I didn't understand until you were placed in my arms.
The love of a mother for her child is so raw and powerful, it defies anything you thought you knew about anything. It makes you want to change yourself and the whole world. So you should know now that whatever happens to me, to you or to the world; and whatever you do, whoever you become - I will love you more than you can imagine. Always."
Most of us have been blessed with loving parents. They made mistakes, failed sometimes, but they loved us!
Many people, me included, blame their parents for a lot of their issues. My mum was a sole parent, and there are so many things I wished she would have done differently, so many words I wished she would have said, or not said!
But now that I'm a mother, I am terrified that my son will think the same one day; that some things I do now, unwillingly, will affect his personality in a negative way.
None of us know how to be the perfect parent. There is no school for it, no steps to follow. And yet we have the power to shape the mind of another human being; and we're doing it in the dark. The advice we get, the books we read, are all contradictory. One may tell you to do one think and another, completely the opposite! Everyday I worry whether my son has everything he needs to thrive, whether I do enough to help him grow into a strong, happy human!
The truth is, we all just do what we think it's best. Many of us succeed and raise our kids well, and they grow into healthy, strong people capable to succeed in life. Sometimes we go wrong and hurt our children, and the guilt of knowing you've done that can be unbearable.
Give your parents a call, visit them, take them out to lunch! If they hurt you, or not raised you they way they should have, try to forgive them! Maybe they were too tired, stressed, overworked; maybe they followed the wrong advice. Whatever the case, they loved, and they LOVE you!
So go hug your parents! :)
Thank you for reading and I hope you found this post useful.
Until next time, Steem on!
Corina
If you ask me who is the strongest human, asked my mother; she raised me despite of hardship we've been through with my 4 sisters, she raised us single handedly, without my father; since my father is an alcohol, and smoke abuser, but he died during my elementary, my mother is so strong that she even hides her problems just to make us not worried.
Seems like we really don't know what we're capable of until we are presented the situation. Demonstration of the strong human spirit!
We always underestimate ourselves and overestimate others and that's what diminishes the self-confidence within, thus not letting us take on bigger challenges in life. Human is the most magnificent creature of God and realising one's potential is a great deal. We come across a new version of ourselves during these hard times which make us a stronger person.
Your mother sounds like a super-human, you must be very proud! Thank you so much for reading.
I second that
Your mom is really a superwoman I would say. Same goes for my father. My grandfather died when he was in grade 6th and since then he has taken care of his family by giving tuitions to other kids. He used to study under the street lights because he didn't have electricity that time and managing everything on his own was a real challenge. But he grew from that situation and has given a great life to his family. I feel really lucky to have a father like him.
Beautiful .. true love Really, that's amazing
Great post from you
Thanks for sharing
I so relate to your post! Our parents are just humans themselves and aren't perfect although growing up to about the age of 10 or 11, we think they are. Best thing to do is be a great role model to them. Working on yourself and continuing to improve and learn is so important as it shows your child that life is an ongoing process of growing.
I remember when I was around 10 and I realized that my mum makes mistakes and she doesn't know everything! I was mind-blown lol! I think the most important thing is to be close and genuine with your kids, talk to them as much as possible, be honest and apologise when you're wrong. Be their friend! Thank you for taking the time to read my post.
No matter what you do, children will always judge their parents. In this case, what is left to do is easy. Prepare your child for the life and for the world the best you can 😀. How are you doing this? I am not in a position to advise anyone, as I have my own difficult moments 😅.
As long as it grows in a strong person, it will get to the point to understand why.
Trying to explain to our children, why we do everything we do now, is a mistake. They will not get it, and we may destroy that innocence they need 😉.
Speaking about parenting, it seems that your mom did a pretty good job 😀.
Thank you for your comment Laurentiu. I guess you're right., children will blame you no matter what. I guess the most important thing is to know that you did your best.
I'm a parent, my wife is the other one, for two kids. What I've learned in 5 + years of parenting: don't get attached to outcomes. Just do the next indicated step. There is also a really good book out there that I think should be made available everywhere: "Raising Human Beings", by Dr. Ross W. Greene. He has written by far, the best books I have ever found on parenting.
As to my parents, I'd hug them if they were in town. But they're about 700 miles away at the moment. :)
Thanks for sharing.
I will check that book out, thank you for sharing! Sorry your parents are so far away, maybe send them a virtual hug :)
... and go hug your children, too!
That is even more important! Thank you!
A beautiful post @corina
Thanks for sharing it.
I'm with you when It comes to analysing my own issues and blaming it on my parents. It's not all their fault, as you have rightly pointed out, and sometimes stuff happens!
My daughter is 15 next week (where has the time gone) and I have learned so much from her and from bringing her up. It's a challenge every day but a brilliant one with so many rewards.
It's times like these when we can look back and see the good things that our parent/s did for us. They probably sacrificed more than we will ever know.
Cheers, Gaz.
I agree with you. We can blame our parents, but shoulda, coulda, woulda. Looking back is always hindsight 20/20. If things didn't turn out the way it did, we wouldn't be here right now. Gotta remind myself of that daily.
So true @victoriacalloway
For every negative we remember there is probably a ton of positive memories and we don't.
Gaz
That's true.. we often focus on mistakes, and forget to be thankful for the good things we got from our parents. Thank you for your kind words and happy birthday to you daughter next week!
Thanks. I will pass the birthday wishes on. She'll be chuffed! :)
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Thank you @corina for this beautiful post. I agree with you 100%. Our parent raised us they knew how and we all have scares and when we are adults its time to take our destiny in our hands and start living and be responsible humans and not forever blame our parents for what they did or did not do. They did the best they knew how. Love them and forgive them for their mistakes. Enjoy what is left and don't dwell, blame for should haves and could haves. You are an adult and you can choose to live or to blame and hide.
This us the best post on steem @cornia.Our life is better than parents.Mother is the main fighter in family.I love it.Thank you so much for your reading.