Ap-petite - Day
Ap-petite
I've never been a big eater, in fact, often I struggle to eat enough. I don't really crave a lot of food, my appetite is small. Six small meals is ideal, but I usually don't reach my goal.
When I was married for 20 years to my abuser, I was lucky to eat one small meal a day. Some people eat when stressed. I learned that I had a tendency toward anorexia. I can't eat when stressed. I stumbled on a talk show one day during a three day stretch that I had not been able to eat. It was exhausted and cold.
I was undergoing a lot of stress because one of my family members was in crisis and I was afraid. The talk show was Sally Jesse Raphael.
I sat watching my TV and listening to emaciated women who weighed no more than 70 pounds discussing how they believed that they were fat. They were all bones and looked gaunt.
The rude awakening came when I started listening to the words out of their mouth and the things that they were thinking and it slowly began to dawn on me this is how I think, could I be like them?
Fortunately, I had never gotten to the point where I needed to be hospitalized. They were times that I would create food and then talk myself through eating it, I would pretend that I had made it for my children and not for myself and then I would say to myself, "You need to eat this, or you're going to get sick."
I ate like a rabbit; very little and low fat foods. I bruised very easily, and I never understood why. There were vital nutrients that I was lacking because of my poor diet.
Fast forward to today. I am a post-menopausal woman and now I have early onset osteoporosis. I can blame my poor eating and my anorexic type tendencies on this particular disease.
I'm healthier now and I try to eat as regularly as I can. The hardest obstacle that I have now is migraines. When I have a migraine I simply can't eat. I'm very blessed that Jeff and my son will make food and coax me into eating, even if I feel like I have no appetite.
Times up! Thank you for reading!
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Thank you so much!!
I have an eating disorder on other end of tbe spectrum. Quite miserable living with a sense that i can't reach a situation of balanced habits regarding nutrition. I should learn to cook i think. Glad to read such an article .. it is clearly written from a place of closure acceptance and resolution. Good on you. Best wishes.
My thoughts and prayers go to you. It is so important to eat healthy and to take care of these bodies. We are only given one in this lifetime and we are taught that we should take care of it and nurtured it for a long life. I wish I would have understood that my emotional health was affecting my nutrition so much. It helps to make any positive changes at any time in your life. I am now on a weekly medication to help restore some of my bone strength and I try to walk and exercise regularly. One day at a time.
Indeed, my dear friend. forward we shall march. No looking back except to learn something from the experience. Blessings to you and yours this weekend.
This is exactly truth! One day at a time we learn from our past and forge forward to a better future!
Migraines are the worst! I cant imagine eating when they strike, either. Ive had three attacks in my lifetime, and they've all lasted a month or more straight through. Meds coupled with the pain just doesn't make eating a priority. Glad you have a good family to support you and make you meals when you're suffering. Smoking cannabis helped with the lack of appetite but actually made the pain worse once it wore off. Wishing you lots of luck in finding comfort with your migraines.
I am sorry to hear you have had migraines, but so happy that they are limited to 3. They are no fun! (I got one today, but thank God, it's improving. I'm just tired) I use CBD tincture twice a day, but not sure how effective it is.
Three episodes. They each lasted a month or more! It was a crazy cycle of waking up at 3am every single morning in pain that kept getting worse over time so the point where I was getting up at least 4 times in the night to take pain meds just so I could get 30 minutes of sleep at a time. By the third week I realized I was making myself worse with the cycle of meds and finally went to a specialist. I ended up on an anti depressant called Elavil (after trying literally every drug on the market. My closet was filled with half used prescriptions, nasal sprays, jaw apparatus, head gear, you name it, I tried it!). Its not prescribed for depression anymore bc it doesn't work. But, it does have a muscle relaxer in it and you take it at night instead of the AM. Three months total - one month to build it up in the system, one month to be "on" the meds and one month to ween off. I actually found out about it through another migraine sufferer who was embarrassed by the depression label, so I dont think too many people know about it. But....it was a miracle drug for me. It broke the cycle I was stuck in and since then, the episodes are much easier to control. But, I know if I ever get stuck again, Ill be asking for Elavil right away.
I tried CBD during the most recent episode. It seemed like it helped the first day, but by the third day of migraine pain I had basically just drank from the bottle hoping it would help, LOL. It didn't. But it was also from a hemp plant, so I think the ones with a tiny bit of THC are better.
I feel ya on the migraines. I am also bad on the eating bit, especially when upset or overwhelmed. Living expenses are so insane, that I put off my healthy eating to make sure my child has food to eat. When I am tired, I don't eat either, which is not good because I already hardly eat while at work. I mainly eat dinner except weekends when I eat cereal.
I'm glad that show was a wakeup call for you so many years ago. You were meant to be here, and for us all to meet, even if online.
Hugs to ya my friend @)-
---- @)-------Cute picture love. I am so glad to hear that you are finally healthy and happy!
Thank you very much, my dear Kubby! Much has changed, and for the better! I'm very grateful to God into those who he has brought into my life to enrich it, Jeff will make sure I eat LOL!
I don't get migraines often, but when I do I can't eat because I am too busy throwing up or wishing I could die. They are the worst thing ever. I also don't eat if I am stressed or anxious. Those times it is easier to deal with...
Truly, migraines are cruel for these reasons. I'm fortunate that I don't throw up, but my stomach clenches up like a vice and sometimes it's a whole entire day before I can eat something. I'm lucky if I can drink water and clear fluids until it passes. Stress, depending on how severe it is, is almost as bad for me. Thank you for the comment, my dear friend and remember to eat no matter what if you can possibly do it!
emotion n stress can completly kill hunger i have felt it knowing i should be hungry but the feeling of hunger wasnt there
Yes, stress is a monster in many ways and I need to be ever vigilant to combat it. Thank you for stopping by and reading!
:) i came by to hand the cute wabbit another carrot before i start watching netflix hehe but first i got edits to drop nods and im off
You're too kind! :)
:D waves im still waking up hehe
I think the most important step you took was to recognize and accept the problem that you had; After that, with the medical assistance and the help of the family, surely the health situation will improve. Good for you @wandrnrose7 ... Greetings.
I agree and thank you for your kind words.