Season of Crimson Blossoms - April 1|Day #1 - Diary of The Struggling Writer from Ife

Dear Diary

You do not have to forgive me, for I’ve haven’t sinned against you yet. Rather, I have been busy pursuing money, so busy, so engrossed that I didn’t know I had left my soul behind. I am like a mother that runs to catch the morning bus and leaves her suckling child at the bus-stop. But now, I am back.

It took the falling price of SBD and Steem to wash the scales off my face. Looking back, I look at those times when I wrote, not because I enjoyed it, but because I wanted the money. For that reason, I was less than what I could be. I was like an eagle who, in whose search for daily meals, began to roam just above the ground. The eagle will always find meals. The eagle will never live to its full potential. The eagle will never find fulfilment.

It has been around three months since I became active on Steemit. During that period, almost everything else in my life was on hold. Steemit reigned supreme. I still struggle to hold myself from checking my blog every-time I set my eyes on my phone. It is becoming an addiction. A harmful addiction. It is harmful because it keeps changing me. Now, I am gradually becoming a sycophant, a sucker for money, always in the search for new ways to make more money. In my pursuit for the golden egg, I ignored the goose.

I am a writer. Strangely, I find it hard to defend that statement. But I know I am one. However, Steemit had made me a deformed writer. I am always demanding from my muse, from my mind, from my body. I tackle every writing prompt that comes my way. It is all for the money. I don’t get that much from my payouts (when you subtract the fees I pay for the daily upvotes) and so I turn to contests to meet my needs. I win a lot but I am gradually losing my soul.

I believe that the best-selling authors can mostly be found doing any of these two things: Working on their next best-seller or reading someone else’s. I have not been doing any. In the past three months, I haven’t read any novel or writing workbook. I haven’t attended a single writers’ workshop or exhibition. I have been alienated from my kind. My soul has been staving everyday for the past months.

In spite of the above, I still demand from it. And it delivers. It always delivers. But I am gradually becoming a child that demands milk from a staving and emaciated mother. The mother will always feed, until the child’s constant meals will mean the death of the mother. And then, in this case, death will call for the child too. I don’t want the writer in me to die.

Two days ago, a friend called Lake gave me a book - ’Season of Crimson Blossoms by Abubakar Adam Ibrahim’. Reading this book gives me a lot of insights, one of which I’ve always know but never paid attention to: “It is not the story; it is how you tell it.” Abubakar tells what might seem as an ordinary story with a deft pen. The choice of words, invoked imagery and writer-reader interaction is just superb. Little wonder that the book has gone on to collect several nominations and awards.

Maybe I have an inflated sense of ability but I believe I can become an award-winning writer too. I have all of the raw materials. I have the experiences to draw upon. I have a computer and internet enabled phone. I have a muse that always delivers. I only need to apply myself to the basics of writing. To feed my soul and watch it flourish. To seek the spring of ink within me and use it to paint a new world.

And that is why I took this break. To focus on myself and the things that matter. This month, I’ll reading good books, working on my magazine and removing myself from the cares and hurries of the fast-paced world. I am a writer. Watch out for me.

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Daily contests

To appreciate those who come around, I am also hosting a daily contest.

@moneyinfant sent in the only valid entry yesterday so he’s automatically the winner.

Here’s how to participate

1. Upvote and Resteem this post

2. Write your entry in the comment section based on the prompt for the day

3. Use the tag #myentry so I can tell entries from normal comments.

The prompt for today is: What book have you read recently and what lesson did you glean from it?

The best two entries (in my opinion) will get one (1) @steembasicincome each

Winners will be announced in the next post

Thanks for reading

Blessings

[Image Source: I took the picture with my phone and edited it]