Welcome to Punday Monday!

If you’re new here, pull up a stool, order a pun-t, and get to know some of the regulars! I’m your puntender, @improv.
You can jump in any time, and if you aren’t sure how to make a pun, here’s a handy dandy guide:
https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/puns-and-prizes-learn-to-pun-easy-fun-anybody-can-be-a-hit-at-parties

If you’re an oldtimer, welcome back! Get to know some of the whippersnappers, here, we have a whiskey from an oaken cask, very peaty - it aged in the cellar of a shepherd’s farmhouse in Ireland (perhaps you’ll especially like it, @ablaze). On the house:
(My child loves sheep, but is afraid of horses. I’m thinking of getting her a rocking sheep. I’d be thrilled to get it with the liquid Steem payout of this post, WOODEN EWE?)

And since you’re an oldtimer, you might be interested in the results of our first annual best pun contest:
https://steemit.com/contest/@freewritehouse/punday-monday-year-one-day-awards-ceremony

If you’re an any-timer, old or whipper, make sure you visit @freewritehouse! There you can meet fellow lovers of goofiness and find even more contests every week! We’re also now featured in the @steembasicincome contest round-up! Find more opportunities to win SBI there!

Hang on to your punderwear...

There’s no business like show business, so let’s show you the business we’re dealing with today!

Here’s last week’s post, and all the puns that are eligible to win this week are in the comments!
https://steemit.com/contest/@improv/punday-monday-65-come-have-funday

Rookie of the Week!

There was no rookie of this week because we had a week full of wonderful puns from veterans! So, I instead will give it to the veteran who not only has made the most puns on the blockchain (at least as far as I know - he always has dozens of good ones on every single Punday post) and he’s the fellow who single-handedly chose this week’s POCKET winner, THE @paul.atreides!

Pocket Choice awards

Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here:
https://steemit.com/pocket/@improv/3bfmje-pocket-friday-for-punday-monday

This week’s winner won a #steembasicincome share, because @freedomshift sponsors an SBI award for our #ccc qualified contest posts. Check out what the Curation Circle Creed is all about by visiting this link: The Honor Code - the Creed (Conditions and Limits Inside)

@heroic15397 won because @paul.atreides’ chose him! You could be choosing these winners! Check out the feed every Friday to find out how! He wins! As I’m sure you all remember, we’re coming up on the big annual POCKET Choice awards ceremony. THIS IS the last opportunity to be inducted into the first season’s POCKET Awards Circle! So, go find the biggest POCKET holders, and advocate for your pun to win! That post goes up on Fridays.

If you want to LEARN about POCKET, so you can participate in voting for your favorites, go ahead and check out this link
https://steemit.com/pocket/@improv/pocket-friday-for-punday-monday-here-s-a-way-to-use-your-pocket-and-get-a-laugh
You can also check out more info by @biophil, the creator of POCKET, and he’ll teach you. Check out his posts!

The folks in the POCKET Choice winner's circle are @aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.

and our grand prize…

The prize for best pun

Best pun of the entire week

Winner of our weekly SBI share giveaway

Best Overall Pun

DRUMROLL, PLEASE

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.

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@doctorcrypto! I had to confirm with my wife @stinawog that this was the absolutely funniest joke that can be made about mosquitos, and she agreed. You made the best possible joke. Of all the jokes in the world. You found it. High fives and prizes!

Another big week with many puns! I’m so proud of our veteran punsters! You all are consistently hilarious, and you should have plaques on your walls that say so. If you didn’t read last week’s, go read them all! It’s never past payout for a laugh attack. I’m also proud of you all for interacting so beautifully and humorfully and supportively. YOU ARE GREAT.

And what prizes do they win, you ask?

Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions. (WORTH $0.02! So much value! I mean, STEEM is rising, so really, it is.)

Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote -let me know in a comment here- and a @tipu tip!

And they all get big, exciting SBI prizes!

(@heroic15397, you’ll get your POCKET Choice award from @freedomshift!)

This week's pun topic is...

Family! (I’m staying with my folks on their farm right now)

As in,
Why do you two, my aunt’s kids, always get me into troublesome mischief? You always listen to us, Cuz Sin!

Perfect,

I'm so good at puns....

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge? This past week’s winners, @doctorcrypto and @heroic15397

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And, as long as I have your attention… well, this place is already saturated with people who have referral codes for various “free money” things, but here are mine!

Coinbase: Cryptocurrency investment- https://www.coinbase.com/join/5929c0788331aa072d9e347e
(Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know. - I learned from someone else that buying LTC and sending it to bittrex then trading it for BTC then trading that for STEEM is the least-fees way. Can someone confirm?)
Robinhood: investment platform buying/selling stocks- http://share.robinhood.com/brendaw92
Earn.com: small tasks for small rewards (need a business or .edu email) - http://earn.com/improv/referral/?a=qmk07e7tzua677hk
Mannabase: sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency- https://www.mannabase.com/?ref=3984bea863
Swift: Yet another attempt at a UBI: https://www.swiftdemand.com/?referred_by=lochleinn

Also, here's a little tidbit I enjoyed writing on discord the other day in response to someone's username:

Princess, like THE princess? Kate Middleton is on the server?
(is she a princess?)
(I don't know how monarchies work)
(And star wars has made me even more confused about princessnesses)
(Like, is princess leia really a princess? We never see her princessing.)
(Only rebelling)