I wish my vote was worth something so i could give you something. Reading this has made me feel a little less alone, one of the beauties of this online world.
Just as the wise elders of medicine tribes have identified social isolation and a sense of lack of belonging in strong community as the core root of addiction, I found myself sitting right in the middle of that truth
I too have an addictive personality, and have drawn similar conclusions to your self about why that is. The biggest distortion i have over come was a 17 year battle with Bulimia, which started at the age of 11 and finally came to an end at the age of 28. How i didn't die and made it through relatively unscathed i honestly have no idea. I have a few minor complaints as a result of it but i'm so lucky that im not incredibly fucked up physically.
It was my escapism, the binge episodes took my mind off thinking, and the purge episodes emptied all the pain, some weird thing set in my head where i would temporarily feel relief from the excruciating sense of isolation when my stomach didn't even have any bile in it, my head would be dizzy, my body would feel weak, i would lie on the bed and have a temporary moment of peace.
From about 23-28 i would say i was starting to turn a corner, the episodes got less frequent. One day almost 2 years ago i just decided that's it, I have to stop. I had told my self that 100's of times, and I don't know what made that decision stick, maybe meeting my boyfriend, finally finding someone who i can relate to on a level i had not encountered my entire life, but i also started smoking a lot of cannabis too, maybe it was both. I potentially swapped one bad habit for another, but it's only recently i made that connection, it's only very recently i've looked at my self and thought shit, im smoking this pretty much every day. However, i think it's a good thing, it broke that cycle and is far less detrimental to my health- maybe that's denial talking.
Over the last month or so i've cut that down to 2 or 3 nights a week, which is most likely why im struggling a little more with the depression. Your 5-HTP advice came at a good time, i didn't manage to find some in town, so i've ordered it online.
I feel somewhat better about life in general but i still carry all those same feelings of isolation etc, one reason i have turned to blogging. I have been on Steemit just over a week, and it has helped, i have read some amazing posts and connected with some really insightful people. But yes, the paradox- I have spent hours a day on here, i have to be mindful of my self.
I am slowly figuring out better ways to deal with things, but the flip side to this also is- What is normal? Who decided what was an addiction level and what was not? and who were the subjects? Your every day joe who does not expand their thinking a great deal more than their basic conditioning? Going to work, watching TV, going to the pub on the weekend? Smoking or drinking x amount for that person may be a problematic level based on, i dont know, levels of stress they were displaying. But for other's such as many people here, smoking cannabis or drinking 2 or 3 times a week when your brain output is 4 times that (just an example) of the 'normal' may not be a problem. Maybe it's necessary? I am not saying that this is what i actually think, just something i have pondered, what level are we striving for, who set it?
Ancients from all sorts of cultures used plant medicines, it was an integral part of many of their cultures, maybe one part of the problem is that we've been denied these medicines, i even read something recently which points as Jesus being an avid mushroom user. Maybe our sickness is that we are disconnected not only from each other but nature and the universe too. Do plant medicines connect you briefly to that?
And Remind you that you're not alone, just in a temporary physical body. I am feeling like i may get a lot of hate for this post. Oh well. I dont think they would be something intended for daily use, here lies the 'problem' when using them recreationally, they weren't designed for that. But it would seem that they were integral in older civilisations, and look at some of the things they accomplished which we cannot replicate today.
I want to try ayahuasca some day, it will be a long time before i will be able to financially do that, but it's on my bucket list. I hope it helps you on your journey :)
I am feeling like i may get a lot of hate for this post.
Your mind (outdated programming) playing tricks on you.
Anyone who would hate on this post does not belong on this blog. I’ve ensured to make the rules for this digital space of mine clear, such that anyone would have been quickly put in their place and repelled.
Such sharing are welcome and appreciated here. And you have my word, that if anyone would ever express any sort of hate towards such a genuine sharing, I would 100% have your back and lay into them hard, throwing their bullshit right back in their face.
I understand where such fears would come from - trauma - though assure you, this is a safe space for such open sharing.
I want to try ayahuasca some day, it will be a long time before i will be able to financially
Maybe, maybe not.
I have a friend in Florida who has done with a ‘shaman’ (not traditionally trained, but legit) who refuses to charge anything for his offerings.
There is always the possibility of crossing paths with someone like that, removing the financial barrier.
Where do you live? Perhaps I could even see if there’d be any chance he may be travelling near you and make a connection...
Thank you, that comment put a fat smile across my face. Absolutely I've had so many negative reactions to things i have tried to talk about, i am just expecting a back lash. Ill get there, i got onto Steemit. But thanks, it does really mean a lot to know other people will have your back, and ill try and keep what you said in mind, if i am writing on like minded blogs, it's not likely to be full of people who do not relate to what's being discussed. I learned the hard way that Facebook was not the place for expanded thinking.
Im going to make some tea and read the link you've given me ! Im based in England Uk, so if he's ever over here the UK is small enough that it's easy to travel virtually anywhere in it! ha.
Or maybe a bit down the line when i am on my feet a flight to Florida wouldn't be an extremely difficult thing to save for. I will keep this is mind. :)
I just realised how stupid i sounded then, he wouldn't come over here with a suitcase full of ayahuasca! ha. It just dropped when i was making my tea! But, that said, someone like that would be someone i would like to meet anyway if for some reason he was.
Ive always been drawn to your music when I see it, and now this. I wrote this exact same post (only I still smoke weed and dont drink much) last week. Pretty much exactly sorta. I relate. A lot. I found a 6 week mostly away from here break helped, but then I just came back.
Call it addiction, if you will. But that night, I saw/felt it clearly: the hit I was looking for was that which I've found in meaningful interactions. Be it a few short words, or a longer, thoughtful dialogue. I've been extremely hungry for deep, human relation.
Ive spent 6 years living in remote isolated conditions by myself. Now Im in a new city but know no-one here at all, so I am still isolated and remote and spend eons at the keyboard for social human touch. Im not sure that is good, but Im not sure its bad either. Im in a very similar headspace to this post.
Mine is past payout, but please take a look, you may find the bit toward the end, useful in this case, to consider. Where I broke down what I think may be the real importance of things here, hint, it's not important.
I think, this requires a very loud shout to encourage people to realize this. I'm really interested in what is written here. It seems that this will be more coherent when comparing it to what Albert Eisntein once said:
"I fear that one day technology will go beyond human interaction. The world will have an idiot generation"...
Back!
After a long period of partial absent from steemit due to academic hustles, now i am back to steemit full time but guess what? Only to be graced by a tantalizing article from @rok-sivante someone who i regard with high esteem for his vasertility in knowledge.
It really feels good to be back and i must say i am adddicted to steemit. Even during my partial absence, i still couldnt but hop and daily and upvote posts even though i dont comment.
Yes, addiction may be a form of illness. But it goes so much deeper than that.
I must at this point concur with you that it really does. Kudos to @ogochukwu for that wonderful contribution, i am benefactor to those principles and possible way out you highlighted.
One thing i have always beleived in life is that ; to every problem, there is always a solution. Its left for us humans to actually find the solution. My main addiction during my first year in the university was watching wrestling on youtube. To the extent that i had to always leave my hostel as early as possible in order to be the first at the wifi station. At a point, i just had to discipline myself, deleted youtube from my phone, infact i had to change my to a non browsing one for some time. I wanted to know if actually i can get out of it,oh yeah, i did. I realised that it really takes strong determination to actually get out of sone addictions. Though mine maybe quite an easy one to others, but to me it was really a burden.
Just like you asked
Is there a way out ?
Yes there is and you mentioned one of the means- death.
But as humans, we all love our lives, most will not want death as first resort.
Getting out of addiction is a gradual process, but i beleive when gradual and diplomatic withdrawal from those things that make us addicted will help a lot.
As long as hope is alive, we can always overcome.
Let me drop my pen here✍️
My addiction to @steemit and @rok-sivante post, haha. I need no therapy righ now and i dont think i will be needing any in the nearest future😊😎
I guess no one is exempted to addiction. We could be addicted to anything. If addiction is severe, mandatory action is needed, or else it would end up in a tragic endpoint. Guidance is necessary on this case. A community or person or people is as well important for support, primarily the family or love ones, then friends and relatives. A heavy load needs to be carried by more than 1 person. Addiction is obviously heavy and needs to be carried out and thrown by several people, not a single one.
It's so annoying I've been very busy this days to drop comment on your posts...
We've been celebrating sallah.
Heavy sigh... This is a great post sir, if I'd confess ADDICTION is a very strong spirit that affects almost everyone. One way or the other there must be something that you'll be obsessed with regardless your integrity....
And the biggest battle is putting an end to the addiction.
I wasn't constantly checking social media for likes or stimulation, as might be typically expected. I was doing it because I was craving a sense of connection.
Indeed it was very expected and I've noticed a whole lot of changes in your post too....
And for AYAHUASCA how soon will that be sir, I'm really looking forward to experiencing it someday, and hope the so called 'grandmother' will not stop you from posting....
As for though I don't see nothing wrong in being addicted with social media as long as its for the right cause, I think Steemit is worth being addicted to, i see nothing wrong with that....
Glad to hear about the upcoming retreat, I cant wait for you to share your Ayahuasca experience again and all the changes that will follow, I will love if you could share more details, a lot of details if possible,..
My opinion to this post is that this hunger for a deeper more meaningful connection means youre blazing alive, I mean what will be the point of living if weve gotten all we want already, its probably all just part of the journey.
I hope you find the answers you seek for, the directions you seek, and more puzzles to put together, most importantly to feel alive again.
It get more interesting checking through your blog as i have been feed with the much needed dose to hold on.
You use this post to talk about the word addiction and you were able to draw hypothesis with your daily life. Setting such example is good as it helps those looking up to you to gain much yielded knowledge.
On my own angle, i have been addicted to something beneficiary. I still do facebook but not as usual and when i see people dish in good post there just to get meaningless like, i got really pissed off.
I made a call to my self and i said if i can be addicted to facebook without a reward, i should change the channel to a more useful place.
Smoking, drinking are one habit i never love and i dont think i will be falling to that anymore.
been addicted is good, when is been showed on the right spot
I wish my vote was worth something so i could give you something. Reading this has made me feel a little less alone, one of the beauties of this online world.
Just as the wise elders of medicine tribes have identified social isolation and a sense of lack of belonging in strong community as the core root of addiction, I found myself sitting right in the middle of that truth
I too have an addictive personality, and have drawn similar conclusions to your self about why that is. The biggest distortion i have over come was a 17 year battle with Bulimia, which started at the age of 11 and finally came to an end at the age of 28. How i didn't die and made it through relatively unscathed i honestly have no idea. I have a few minor complaints as a result of it but i'm so lucky that im not incredibly fucked up physically.
It was my escapism, the binge episodes took my mind off thinking, and the purge episodes emptied all the pain, some weird thing set in my head where i would temporarily feel relief from the excruciating sense of isolation when my stomach didn't even have any bile in it, my head would be dizzy, my body would feel weak, i would lie on the bed and have a temporary moment of peace.
From about 23-28 i would say i was starting to turn a corner, the episodes got less frequent. One day almost 2 years ago i just decided that's it, I have to stop. I had told my self that 100's of times, and I don't know what made that decision stick, maybe meeting my boyfriend, finally finding someone who i can relate to on a level i had not encountered my entire life, but i also started smoking a lot of cannabis too, maybe it was both. I potentially swapped one bad habit for another, but it's only recently i made that connection, it's only very recently i've looked at my self and thought shit, im smoking this pretty much every day. However, i think it's a good thing, it broke that cycle and is far less detrimental to my health- maybe that's denial talking.
Over the last month or so i've cut that down to 2 or 3 nights a week, which is most likely why im struggling a little more with the depression. Your 5-HTP advice came at a good time, i didn't manage to find some in town, so i've ordered it online.
I feel somewhat better about life in general but i still carry all those same feelings of isolation etc, one reason i have turned to blogging. I have been on Steemit just over a week, and it has helped, i have read some amazing posts and connected with some really insightful people. But yes, the paradox- I have spent hours a day on here, i have to be mindful of my self.
I am slowly figuring out better ways to deal with things, but the flip side to this also is- What is normal? Who decided what was an addiction level and what was not? and who were the subjects? Your every day joe who does not expand their thinking a great deal more than their basic conditioning? Going to work, watching TV, going to the pub on the weekend? Smoking or drinking x amount for that person may be a problematic level based on, i dont know, levels of stress they were displaying. But for other's such as many people here, smoking cannabis or drinking 2 or 3 times a week when your brain output is 4 times that (just an example) of the 'normal' may not be a problem. Maybe it's necessary? I am not saying that this is what i actually think, just something i have pondered, what level are we striving for, who set it?
Ancients from all sorts of cultures used plant medicines, it was an integral part of many of their cultures, maybe one part of the problem is that we've been denied these medicines, i even read something recently which points as Jesus being an avid mushroom user. Maybe our sickness is that we are disconnected not only from each other but nature and the universe too. Do plant medicines connect you briefly to that?
And Remind you that you're not alone, just in a temporary physical body. I am feeling like i may get a lot of hate for this post. Oh well. I dont think they would be something intended for daily use, here lies the 'problem' when using them recreationally, they weren't designed for that. But it would seem that they were integral in older civilisations, and look at some of the things they accomplished which we cannot replicate today.
I want to try ayahuasca some day, it will be a long time before i will be able to financially do that, but it's on my bucket list. I hope it helps you on your journey :)
Awesome post.
Mmmm... I think that question might be best answered in this story of my last ayahuasca experience - if not directly, definitely weaved in between the lines.
Your mind (outdated programming) playing tricks on you.
Anyone who would hate on this post does not belong on this blog. I’ve ensured to make the rules for this digital space of mine clear, such that anyone would have been quickly put in their place and repelled.
Such sharing are welcome and appreciated here. And you have my word, that if anyone would ever express any sort of hate towards such a genuine sharing, I would 100% have your back and lay into them hard, throwing their bullshit right back in their face.
I understand where such fears would come from - trauma - though assure you, this is a safe space for such open sharing.
Maybe, maybe not.
I have a friend in Florida who has done with a ‘shaman’ (not traditionally trained, but legit) who refuses to charge anything for his offerings.
There is always the possibility of crossing paths with someone like that, removing the financial barrier.
Where do you live? Perhaps I could even see if there’d be any chance he may be travelling near you and make a connection...
Thank you, that comment put a fat smile across my face. Absolutely I've had so many negative reactions to things i have tried to talk about, i am just expecting a back lash. Ill get there, i got onto Steemit. But thanks, it does really mean a lot to know other people will have your back, and ill try and keep what you said in mind, if i am writing on like minded blogs, it's not likely to be full of people who do not relate to what's being discussed. I learned the hard way that Facebook was not the place for expanded thinking.
Im going to make some tea and read the link you've given me ! Im based in England Uk, so if he's ever over here the UK is small enough that it's easy to travel virtually anywhere in it! ha.
Or maybe a bit down the line when i am on my feet a flight to Florida wouldn't be an extremely difficult thing to save for. I will keep this is mind. :)
I just realised how stupid i sounded then, he wouldn't come over here with a suitcase full of ayahuasca! ha. It just dropped when i was making my tea! But, that said, someone like that would be someone i would like to meet anyway if for some reason he was.
Ive always been drawn to your music when I see it, and now this. I wrote this exact same post (only I still smoke weed and dont drink much) last week. Pretty much exactly sorta. I relate. A lot. I found a 6 week mostly away from here break helped, but then I just came back.
Call it addiction, if you will. But that night, I saw/felt it clearly: the hit I was looking for was that which I've found in meaningful interactions. Be it a few short words, or a longer, thoughtful dialogue. I've been extremely hungry for deep, human relation.
Ive spent 6 years living in remote isolated conditions by myself. Now Im in a new city but know no-one here at all, so I am still isolated and remote and spend eons at the keyboard for social human touch. Im not sure that is good, but Im not sure its bad either. Im in a very similar headspace to this post.
Mine is past payout, but please take a look, you may find the bit toward the end, useful in this case, to consider. Where I broke down what I think may be the real importance of things here, hint, it's not important.
[my similar post]
Jeezus, that post is great. Definitely some parallels...
I saw em too. :) Yours was a visceral read.
I think, this requires a very loud shout to encourage people to realize this. I'm really interested in what is written here. It seems that this will be more coherent when comparing it to what Albert Eisntein once said:
Holy shiiiiit, that is a great quote! Lol.
👏thanks sir...
Back!
After a long period of partial absent from steemit due to academic hustles, now i am back to steemit full time but guess what? Only to be graced by a tantalizing article from @rok-sivante someone who i regard with high esteem for his vasertility in knowledge.
It really feels good to be back and i must say i am adddicted to steemit. Even during my partial absence, i still couldnt but hop and daily and upvote posts even though i dont comment.
I must at this point concur with you that it really does. Kudos to @ogochukwu for that wonderful contribution, i am benefactor to those principles and possible way out you highlighted.
One thing i have always beleived in life is that ; to every problem, there is always a solution. Its left for us humans to actually find the solution. My main addiction during my first year in the university was watching wrestling on youtube. To the extent that i had to always leave my hostel as early as possible in order to be the first at the wifi station. At a point, i just had to discipline myself, deleted youtube from my phone, infact i had to change my to a non browsing one for some time. I wanted to know if actually i can get out of it,oh yeah, i did. I realised that it really takes strong determination to actually get out of sone addictions. Though mine maybe quite an easy one to others, but to me it was really a burden.
Just like you asked
Yes there is and you mentioned one of the means- death.
But as humans, we all love our lives, most will not want death as first resort.
Getting out of addiction is a gradual process, but i beleive when gradual and diplomatic withdrawal from those things that make us addicted will help a lot.
As long as hope is alive, we can always overcome.
Let me drop my pen here✍️
My addiction to @steemit and @rok-sivante post, haha. I need no therapy righ now and i dont think i will be needing any in the nearest future😊😎
Its really good to be back.
I guess no one is exempted to addiction. We could be addicted to anything. If addiction is severe, mandatory action is needed, or else it would end up in a tragic endpoint. Guidance is necessary on this case. A community or person or people is as well important for support, primarily the family or love ones, then friends and relatives. A heavy load needs to be carried by more than 1 person. Addiction is obviously heavy and needs to be carried out and thrown by several people, not a single one.
It's so annoying I've been very busy this days to drop comment on your posts...
We've been celebrating sallah.
Heavy sigh... This is a great post sir, if I'd confess ADDICTION is a very strong spirit that affects almost everyone. One way or the other there must be something that you'll be obsessed with regardless your integrity....
And the biggest battle is putting an end to the addiction.
And for AYAHUASCA how soon will that be sir, I'm really looking forward to experiencing it someday, and hope the so called 'grandmother' will not stop you from posting....
As for though I don't see nothing wrong in being addicted with social media as long as its for the right cause, I think Steemit is worth being addicted to, i see nothing wrong with that....
Good luck with your trip sir..
Glad to hear about the upcoming retreat, I cant wait for you to share your Ayahuasca experience again and all the changes that will follow, I will love if you could share more details, a lot of details if possible,..
My opinion to this post is that this hunger for a deeper more meaningful connection means youre blazing alive, I mean what will be the point of living if weve gotten all we want already, its probably all just part of the journey.
I hope you find the answers you seek for, the directions you seek, and more puzzles to put together, most importantly to feel alive again.
Didn’t get into too many details, though got into a bit of an account after all:
Whirlwind Vents, Tech Addiction, Ayahuasca Breakthroughs...
This candor was medicinal for me. Thank you. Upvoted 'n resteemed.
Your welcome. 🙏
It get more interesting checking through your blog as i have been feed with the much needed dose to hold on.
You use this post to talk about the word addiction and you were able to draw hypothesis with your daily life. Setting such example is good as it helps those looking up to you to gain much yielded knowledge.
On my own angle, i have been addicted to something beneficiary. I still do facebook but not as usual and when i see people dish in good post there just to get meaningless like, i got really pissed off.
I made a call to my self and i said if i can be addicted to facebook without a reward, i should change the channel to a more useful place.
Smoking, drinking are one habit i never love and i dont think i will be falling to that anymore.