What is the secret of happy relationships?

Is not humanity curious? There are so many people who spend their lives in a mad race against the clock, immersed in routine, busy doing thousands of things, and in their free time, they get distracted in front of the TV, connected to Facebook or surrounded by people, noise and dull for alcohol or drugs. However, they do not worry about having happy relationships.

We live most of the time in automatic, accelerated by the accumulation of pending tasks, almost without paying attention. In this vortex of doing and not being, the essential is lost, which is not outside, but inside. We have learned to forget ourselves.

FEAR OF OUR MOST INTIMATE EMOTIONS

Loneliness can be terrifying for some people, who, provided they are accompanied, sacrifice the quality of their relationships. This fear of loneliness often reflects that, deep down, there is the fear of coming into contact with the most intimate emotions, which can be unpleasant or painful. It is preferable, then, to be distracted or lulled by external things ...

But if the emotional needs are not heard and addressed, if we do not accept ourselves unconditionally with our weaknesses and strengths, we will walk through life wearing a mask, pretending to be what we are not to look for in others the acceptance that we ourselves we deny Thus it is impossible to have happy relationships.

The human being is not born being an emotional zombie

Babies do not judge their emotions, they simply feel and express them. It may happen that during the process of socialization, the child is ignored, hurt, ridiculed or abused. Given this, the only recourse he has is to bury in the unconscious the pain he experiences, because he still depends on others to feel worthy of love and respect.

When reaching adulthood, it is imperative to take responsibility for emotional health and take care of healing wounds and filling the gaps of the inner child. Otherwise, he will live with an internal vacuum that he will try to fill in vain with superficial relationships.

LOVING OURSELVES TO HAVE HAPPY RELATIONSHIPS

Our primary task, then, is to learn to see, love and value the most precious thing we have, which is our essence. The more we learn to love ourselves, the greater the desire to share our love with others, because authentic love is expansive by nature. That's what happy relationships are based on. In an authentic love that is born of ourselves.

This expansive wave is unstoppable, and it is then inevitable to want to share this love with others, but not from the emptiness and the mask, but from the fullness and authenticity. From the deepest part of our interior, from our essence.

The reason for being happy relationships is to learn, grow, love, have fun and enjoy each other's company. Because in the end, our true mission in this world is to expand our capacity to love, both ourselves and others. When we understand and live according to that mission, we discover that loving authentically and unconditionally is the greatest treasure we can find.

There is no luxury, pleasure, or achievements, or possessions, or riches that can replace the fullness that true unconditional love produces

But we have to start by loving ourselves and accepting ourselves. Loving oneself provides each member of the couple with the security and confidence that is usually sought in the other. But, instead of trying to get love from the other, and even to demand it, they share the love they have for themselves with their partner. Ironically, they are giving the other what they have always wanted from this one, but that they were not able to give before.

Self abandonment and self-rejection are some of the biggest causes of couples' failure, and learning to love oneself really helps to heal relationships. Loving is the most wonderful thing there is, but you can not give what you do not have. Until we learn to love ourselves, we can not love the other. Ready to cultivate happy relationships?

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              * Face your darkest emotions to be happy *

         All the images were taken from the public domain

 Thanks for taking 5 minutes of your time to read this post

             I'm waiting for your visit for the next time

                                       @joelgonz1982