Free Science Fiction Story - Corporate Takeover Chapter 1
Chapter 1
Candice walked into her office. In front of her was a tablet on her desk. She turned around and looked at the door. She was sure she locked it. No one had a key. She grabbed it with her hand and slowly started to lift it.
Her cell rang.
Candice put the tablet down and looked at her phone. It was a blocked number. She hesitated before answering.
"Hello?"
"Look at the tablet," a woman said over the phone.
Candice started to shake.
"Who is this?"
"I don't have time to explain, look at the tablet."
Candice took a seat and did what she was told. It was a bitcoin address. The amount was $21,541,211.
"Does that number look familiar... it should, it is the net worth of your company. Or was. All your assests have been liquidated and put in this account."
"That's not possible."
"You're desktop is on, look at that screen."
Candice didn't want to keep following her orders. But what choice did she have. She looked at her desktop. A window was opened to payroll. They had been wiped clean. There was another window that listed sales of their building and equipment. Everything she had put her bussiness's name on was gone.
"This..."
"Like I said, we don't have a lot of time, do you want the money? All I have to do is press a button and the entire amount gets sent to you, or I can delete this wallet number and the money gets lost on the blockchain."
"What do you want?"
"Just a meeting, the parking garage in five minutes. Third basement, back corner. Come alone or I delete your number. If you're late, I delete your number... see you in five."
The stranger hung up. Candice paced back and forth. She picked up her cell and typed 911, then deleted it before hitting call. This was her business. Her money. She worked 15 years to get where she was. And now it was all gone. But she could rebuild. Candice threw her phone in her purse and left her office. She did not lock the door behind her. With her index finder she pressed the button for B3. Then she took a deep breath as the elevator started to move.
I'm a bit on the fence with this one. On the one hand, this was written well. The descriptions were concise and the dialogue felt natural. On the other hand, I felt a bit shortchanged, maybe because of the length or the choice to start in media res. Since this is the first chapter, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that the next ones would shed more light regarding the story.
Hey @jedau, this story will be broken into several small chapters that will usually end with a cliff hanger for suspense, or will it, dun dun dun...
Haha yeah, I bet. What I was referring to though was the length and where the story picked up. As a standalone, it's really hard to judge it. I guess that was your intention though, so that readers would be interested to read the follow-up.
nice post
:)
It's too hot. Good writing but remove the lady picture and try to make the story more funny.
Remember Star Wars was a success largely because of comic relief.
You definitely had some suspense in this chapter. However, by the end of the chapter I wasn't invested in Candace. I know it's meant to be short but maybe A little more background information would make me
and other readers latch on to the story and her as a character.