Welcome to the Myths of Man

In my other series Alphabet Adventures I explore the dictionary and the words we use to describe our world in this series I intend to explore the stories we have told with them in order to attempt to describe how our world works.

Todays Myth

Was a whole lot of work to research.

Beowulf

So who was Beowulf?

Not Beowulf
The picture above as labelled is not Beowulf just the kind of bad-ass I picture him to be.

Beowulf was the great hero of an untitled poem in fact longest epic poem written in old English but more importantly than that its also happens to be the oldest surviving piece of literature written in the language with the manuscript dating somewhere between late 10th to early 11th century.

Lots of discussion has been had about whether or not the epic poem was an original work by the unnamed author or merely a transcription of an earlier perhaps oral work although the British library puts their weight behind it being a transcription of an oral tradition.

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In his own words.

Boast Town population Beowulf. A condensed boasting

1: The my dad can beat up your dad boast.

My fathers was a famous soldier, known far and wide as a leader of men
His life lasted many winters; wise men all over the world surely still remember him.

2: The I could beat up your dad boast

My people have seen my strengths for themselves watched me rise from war dripping with my enemies blood.
I drove five great giants into chains and chased all of that race off of the earth.
I have swum in the blackness, hunting monsters out of the ocean killing them one by one.

3: I da bes

I alone with the help of my men can purge the evil from this hall.
I have heard this monsters so fearsome that he needs no weapons nor fears them.
So nor will I, my hands alone shall fight for me, struggle for life against the monster.

The Story.

Set in Scandinavia the story starts with the death of a mighty Danish warrior Shield Sheafson founder of the royal lines of the Spear-Danes blah blah blah ... literary juxtaposition between this funeral and Beowulf own later in the story (oh shit I forgot to say spoilers).

The fun part of the story starts with Hrothgar who if I researcher right was the great grandson of Shield Sheafson.

So Hrothgar Built a mighty mead hall that he called Heorot and filled with drinking and merriness .

Source

Enter the man-eating monster Grendel who lived in a cave beneath a lake, hating the lights, music, and laughter for twelve years Grendel terrorised Hrothgars Heorot devouring every champion sent to challenge him for no Sword could wound him.

Source

Beowulf hearing of the troubles travels with his companions from Geatland to the hall of Hrothgat where he proceeds with his boasts and basically selling them on his prowess and convincing him he was the solution to their problem.

Hrothgar is sold and orders a feast in the name of this new champion Beowulf. Heorot fills with music and merriment that carries on into the night but as it comes to an end and the fires have burnt low and the party goers slept Beowulf kept his watch waiting for the enemy to show.

The waits not long before Grendel comes down from his cave, breaking the doors he quickly devoured the first sleeping body.

Beowulf true to his boast attacks the monster no sword in his hand and such was his strength he tore the creatures arm from his body sending Grendel howling into the night.

Now everyone celebrates certain that Grendel is done, the arm gets mounted on the walls of Heorot making a perfect trophy.

Mama's home!

Who would have thought that the beast had a mother to run home too but that is exactly happened. Late the next night after every one is all partied out Grendel's mother stalked Heorot in vengeful rage only this time Beowulf rested peacefully elsewhere and could not intervene she kills Hrothgars advisor and leaves a trail of destruction in her wake before recovering her sons arm and fleeing.

Beowulf to the rescue.

Once again Beowulf is ready for a fight but this time its personal and the takes the fight to the beast down to the cave beneath the lake.

Now Mama Bear isn't as big or bad ass as Grendel you think the fight should go easy for a man that can tear limbs from bodies but rage and hatred make her strong and she holds her own against the man, well ok she pretty much kicks his ass his sword Hrunting beings as useless against mama as any other sword against Grendel even though Hrunting was meant to be magic.

Enter fate or luck because Beowulfs hand literally falls on a really really magic sword just lying in the cave he quickly dispatches mum and proceeds to decapitate Grendles dead body and the blade of the magic sword dissolves.

The Later Years.

So having become the Muhammad Ali of monster killing, a world renowned Beowulf go back to Geatlan where he eventually becomes King and rules well for 50 years.

The end.....

Lol jk So here is Beowulf, Good King, 80 years old and fate says you know what this guy needs in his life right now?

Thats right a mother flipping dragon.

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Beowulf basically turns around no joke and says "Let do dis fools!" which roughly translates to I want that dragons gold.

So Beowulf gathers a bunch of his men and goes out to the dragons lair everyone is talking big and brave but when the time comes to face the dragon all but one runs to save their hides.

Beowulf and Wiglaf alone are left to face the dragon and together they are victorious...... sort of Beowulf is bitten by the poisonous Dragon but before he dies names Wiglaf the new King of the Geats.

So the story ends how it begins with a funeral blah blah blah literary juxtaposition, completion of the circle blah blah blah.

Want to hear how the story would have sounded when told in the mead halls watch this vid.

Want to hear an awesome rap retelling of the story this is the one for you.

Previous Episodes.
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Kind Regards

Peter