STEEMFest 4 ... "The Whales vs. The Minnows Chess Takedown" (100,000 - or 1 - STEEM Prize)
STEEMFest 4
"Welcome Steemians!
This is your host, @SpreadForWhales ... your favorite Top 20 Witness ... and we are gathered here in Lawlessness Park, in the wonderful city of Steemtopia, for a live video-cast of the The Whales vs. The Minnows Chess Takedown. Playing for the Whales is the Master of Disaster, the Curator of Chaos, the Ransacker of Regulation himself ... @Anarchooooooooooo-Zealot!!! Playing for the Minnows is @QuillFire, who, if you can imagine ... only has a $0.01 upvote!
Folks, there's Big Money on the line. If Anarcho-Zealot wins, he'll add 100,000 STEEM to his already huge bankroll and, if QuillFire wins, he'll add 1 STEEM to his. As you can see, the Players have made their opening moves and the game is underway. Of course, given the players respective wallet sizes, we all know how this will end ... but let's pretend we don't. Hmmm. QuillFire seems to be making a fuss about something. Let's listen in."
"Sorry, mate, you can't do that. Rooks can only move horizontally and vertically, not diagonally."
"My Rook can move any way it wants."
"No it can't. Are you not familiar with the Rules of Chess?"
Anarcho smiled slyly ... much like a weasel, but worse: "Dude ... it's 'No Rulers, No Rules.' I can move any way I like. It's called Freedom."
Quill's eyes narrowed. "If we're going to play together, we'll both have to play by the same Rules. Otherwise, either of us could just cheat and that would defeat the whole point of the game."
"Cheat!? Dude, if there are No Rules to break ... then I'm not breaking any Rules, am I?"
"All games require Rules. Indeed, it is specifically those Rules that differentiate a game from all others. Come on, mate ... just play fair and we'll have some fun."
"Ah," exclaimed Anarcho in exasperation, melodramatically raising his hands into the air as if in supplication to the Heavens (while glancing at the crowd and the cameras to ensure he had an audience). "Do you see what we Whales have to put up with? Demands for Rules and Fairness! Do you know who else wants Rules? Commies! Commies and Fascist Dictators. Nazi scum. Control freaks. And Fairness ... Fairness is subjective. Just like Quality."
Some of the other Whales in the crowd, and many of the Top 20 Witnesses (who were dependent upon Anarcho's stake-weighted Witness Vote), cheered Anarcho's rejoinder dressed as lament. It was so ... anarcho-clever. A word-salad of nothingness, that sounded like somethingness, unless you thought about it ... for 5 seconds. Quill glanced around. Most of the assembled crowd, comprised mostly of Plankton, Minnows and Dolphins, were not cheering but instead sat steely-eyed. But, as usual ... they remained silent, as is expected and required of the Silent Majority.
"So ... this is the way it's going to be," Quill quietly queried, "No Rulers, No Rules?"
"This is the way it IS," Anarcho sneered in retort. "My opinions are worth a lot more than yours because they're stake-weighted. So, whatever I say ... goes. And I say my Rooks, but not yours, can move diagonally. And, if you don't like it ... you can kiss my ass."
Quill sat silently for a moment, contemplating what he'd just heard. After a few moments, his eyebrows arched slightly and he began subtly nodding his head. "OK, then." With that, he rose and walked around the park table upon which they had been playing. Upon arriving behind the seated Anarcho, he reached out, took hold of a handful of Anarcho's hair ... and smashed his face against the marble table-top. Hard.
A collective gasp emanated from the onlooking crowd as Anarcho leapt to his feet, hand clutching his broken and bleeding nose. "Are you FUCKING crazy?" he wailed.
"No Rulers, No Rules ... remember?"
With that Quill punched Anarcho straight in the mouth. Anarcho careened backwards, arms windmilling as he flailed. Quill advanced towards him. "You see, Annie, I'm an ex-military hand-to-hand combat instructor and I'm going to use my 'steak-weighting,' and Freedom to do as I please, not to kiss your ass ... but to kick the shit out of it."
"You can't do that," wailed Anarcho," that's against the Law!"
"The Law? The Law is but a set of Rules, enforced by Rule Enforcers. But you said, 'No Rulers, No Rules.' It's every man for himself and the ends justify the means. And, since I want to win ..." With that, Quill threw a couple of right jabs and followed up with a left upper cut into Anarcho's exposed rolls of stomach fat, a condition no doubt the consequence of Anarcho's favorite snack food: Cheatos. Anarcho crumpled to the ground, gasping for air.
Quill began slowly circling the blubberous writer of Python. As he did, he glanced into the crowd who were now all on their feet. "What's wrong Whales? This is your 'No-Rules mantra' in action, except this time it's one of your own on the receiving end of your dictums. The constraints on social behavior, derived from thousands of years of civilization, reduced to the Law of the Jungle. Everyone gets to do whatever they want and damn the consequences. Anarchy ... 'Satoshi's Dream.'"
Quill peered down at the gasping and blubbering Anarcho. "Did you catch my pun about 'steak-weighting?' You know, 'steak' ... as in meat and muscle, instead of 'stake' ... as in number of votes? Annie, did you think that was funny?" An inarticulate mumbling emanated from the remnants of Anarcho's bloodied and battered face.
"I hope that wasn't a, 'No,' Annie. No matter, you're entitled to your opinion and I to mine. But, since I thought it was hilarious, and only my opinion counts since I'm the Big Man, it was. So ... I'll need some upvotes as reward for my brilliance. Give me your wallet."
Perhaps not surprisingly, Annie's wallet seemed to mean more to him than did his remaining teeth as he clutched his right hand over his back right pocket. Quill raised an eyebrow and moved forward, placing the heel of his shoe on the outstretched fingers of Anarcho's left hand which had been propping up his upper body. And then, in one fluid motion, Quill shifted all his weight onto that heel. Ah, the things you learn in the army. Good times. There was a crunch as bones instantly shattered. Anarcho unleashed a scream of agony that would have impressed Satan at his most vindictive.
"Give me your wallet."
With a trembling hand, Anarcho hurriedly dug out his wallet and passed it to Quill. Peering inside, "Annie, you carry a lot of cash! Let's see: One ... two ... three ... four hundred and twenty ... forty ... sixty ... eighty-three dollars. $483 for a barely comprehensible pun that took approximately one second to 'create.' That sounds like par for the course for your posts, doesn't it? Oh, and give me that fancy-looking watch of yours too." Anarcho desperately did as instructed.
"Thank you for your generous support. Now Annie, I have an important question for you ... so listen carefully and think before you answer: How are Rooks allowed to move?"
"Horibonilly and verbicilly," Anarcho blubbered through his swollen lips and broken teeth.
"And Annie ... are they allowed to move diagonally?
Anarcho vehemently shook his head in the negative, "Nobe."
"And what about common-sense Rules of Conduct to prevent cheating and extremely anti-social behaviors ... are they only for Commies and Fascist Dictators?"
"Nobe."
"It doesn't feel very good when people treat you like shit and take away things they haven't earned, does it Annie?"
"Nobe."
"So, we should all try to refrain from being assholes, shouldn't we?"
"Yeth."
"Well, I'm glad we've come to an agreement respecting the Rules of Chess ... and conducting yourself in a civilized manner." And with that, Quill gingerly helped the beaten-to-within-an-inch-of-his-life Anarcho-Zealot to his feet and gently sat him back down at the park table. Crossing around to the other side of the table, Quill, too, took his seat. Then he reached over to the refreshments side-table and poured them both a cup of tea.
"Now, as I recall ... it's still your move."
Quill
*****
A Series of Articles About Steemit Cheating, Bad Behavior & The Need For Reforms (Proposals Included). If you can read only one, read number 4.
- Jerry Banfield, Down-Voting & Freedom of Speech
- "Down-Voting as Censorship" - A Series About Fixing Steemit - Part 2
- "Derivatives" - A Series About Fixing Steemit - Part 3
- "Central Premise & Proposals" - A Series About Fixing Steemit - Part 4
- FOLLOW UP: "Central Premise & Proposals" - A Series About Fixing Steemit - Part 4
- The Bane of Bidbots ... An Intelligent & Civil Discourse
All images herein are QuillFire modifications of images in the public domain.
You guys know the QuillDrill. Be verbose ... but articulate.
And remember ...
Go Love a Starving Poet
For God's sake ... they're starving!
@quillfire
Quill -
It has taken me a while to come back to this. The analogy is so apt; the satire on point; it is so well written that I had a visceral reaction to the violence. As I always do. And I was reading it at 5.30am. Not sensible.
There is much in your post and in the comments that followed that resonate. The issues of corruption and inappropriately acquired power are so much front of mind for me: South Africa has to deal with deep-rooted corruption which is just being uncovered and which still risks sending our country to the fiscal cliff. It was exactly these things, on a smaller level, that turned the environment in which I had happily worked as a consultant for more than 25 years, into a toxic cesspool. It turned me into a jibbering wreck and a near pauper. Every piece of evidence in my last research project and associated recommendations were second-guessed. A six-month project took 12 - no actually more, because it was 24/7 and shouldn't have been. So bad was it, that when we did the public presentation, a fellow consultant on whom I'd never clapped eyes, took on a director general of a national government department and berated her and the team for their treatment of my team and I. By that point, because they were paying the bill, I was more than done. There was no rational reason for this conduct - we had tested our work with peers who warned us that it was "too good - they won't understand it". We knew it was not what they wanted (needed) to hear; we were the best bidders (experience and price) but not their preferred bidders. Their "preferred" bidders were pals and would have been referees and players. Yes, it left me bruised and bloody and, yes, defeated. To keep my ethics and soul in tact, I have now walked away from that type of work and the sector. Completely. With nothing. The jaundice about which I wrote in my introductory post on Steemit, remains. A digression. But.
All this is what is happening here. As you say. This brings me to
There comes a time when this bunch actually begins to hit back, and I think, as you point out, this is beginning to happen here (and in South Africa). The PHC strategy in the poll demonstrates that. I have just written a post about two other communities of which I am part and which share the ethics espoused in our PHC community. I would like to believe that if the changes are coming - as you and @bluemist suggest - then it will be for the good.
I have to believe that. As I do for South Africa. Perhaps it's because I'm a glass half full (of wine) girl or just insanely idealistic. I do have to believe that good triumphs over evil, and that rules (bent occasionally) are essential. The one that I think is central to all of this is:
Do no harm.
It seems, though, that there are sadists and megalomaniacs on the platform that unless reigned in, will ensure this does not happen.
That said, if there is a shoul of minnows and dolphins who form a school to take on the whales, I'm in.
Brilliant read as always @quillfire
People perception of their own politics is fascinating. One man's communism is another man's dictatorship. It's all a matter of opinion and stance at the time of writing. Subconscious needs controlling their virtuous arguments that, in the end, just end up being about having the power and staying on top.
Unfortunately, this is not just a Steemit problem.
Great job my friend.
Gaz
@cheese4ead,
Hi Cheese.
Food for thought: When such terms are hurled about as the result of someone suggesting that the blockchain needs a few common-sense, community-determined Rules of Conduct, like those in force in any other real world organization to which one might belong, is it really about "people's perception of politics?"
Or, as I would argue, are such ad hominem attacks designed to "shut down conversations before they begin?" This is the oldest rhetorical trick in the book. Obviously, arguing that "bidbots are destroying curation" has nothing to do with any political philosophy and only an ideologue, incapable of making a cogent counter-argument, would attempt to assert otherwise.
People need to stop falling for it. This is Misdirection 101. This is not about being Left or Right (or like myself, Centrist), it's about cheating or playing fairly. Name one other organization that permits systemic levels of cheating ... indeed, where the "leaders of the organization" encourage it since they're the ones who own the mechanisms of the malfeasance.
Actually, I could name one: The present government of Venezuela.
Quill
Totally agree. @quillfire
It's easy to shot out 'Racist, Fascist, Nazi, Commie etc to shout someone down and try to kill off what would be sane and reasonable debate. Fear of losing your power, position and control drive these people.
The good of the whole community then gets lost in a sh*tfest of slander, lies and deceit. Like you say, smoke and mirrors, misdirection for the true issues that the powers that be are burying!
@cheese4ead,
To quote our illustrious and indefatigable, @jaynie, "BOOM!"
Quill
😁
Arhhh... Painful. No rules? That's what everyone gets...
Posted using Partiko Android
@lilacse,
"Arhhh"... is right.
How are we supposed to solve tough problems when we can't even deal with this chickenshit stuff? Read my hyperlinked posts ... the solutions are easy.
As long as cryptos are dominated by ideologues (Political Anarchists), we'll flounder. I pray for the day when the hated Goldman Sachs of the world (greedy bastards, but at least adults) get in here, take over and start banging some heads together.
Quill
Okay... remind me never to play chess with you!
However, I completely agree with the sentiment of the post. It is one that I struggle with as well, in a society that is larger than what can be feasibly bound by reputation or familiarity of trading/interaction partners... there does need to a formal set of rules to bind behavior.... and like it or not, some entity that can enforce those rules. Sadly, if there are those who abuse the rules to get ahead... however, that doesn't make for a persuasive case to throw out the concept of rules altogther!
@bengy,
:-)
Technology changes, people don't. And the Human Element is what has been so distorted in cryptoland. It's not about the computer code ... it's about the genetic one. Human beings are incredibly (even pathetically) social animals. We have, over millions of years, evolved an incredibly complex set of social values that are built into our genes. These cannot be turned off. So, you write computer code that reflects them. And, where the code cannot handle their complexity, you create a system that incorporates human discretion.
In cryptoland, if a solution is not "an algorithm," then it's no good.
This fantasyland, created by a sub-group of people notoriously low in social skills, computer programmers, is not sustainable. When normal people are "cheated," they do not react by shrugging their shoulders as if it were some "white paper abstraction" ... they feel Anger, Contempt or Disgust (the three negative "Other-Judging Emotions) and seek to punish the cheater. Every Rebellion and Revolution is history has started this way.
If STEEM/Steemit is to cohere, it needs to start operating in a manner that is not innately objectionable to human social values.
Quill
Priceless buddy. This is so fabulously funny. 👍👍
Posted using Partiko Android
@wonderwop,
Thanks mate. I always have fun writing satire. If it doesn't make me laugh, I cut it out. The trial and error results in my guffawing like an idiot. :-)
Quill
Well played, good sir! And...
via GIPHY
@traciyork - I love that. How do you do that? :D
@traciyork,
Traci, I kid you not when I say that this is the BEST GIF I have ever seen. By a mile.
If only I'd had this for the post itself.
It is ... delicious.
If someone with upvote power sees this comment, would you do me a huge favor and upvote this to the very top?
Quill
Well I don't have much power either, but yea! we got it to the top! You are so awesome with those gifs @traciyork.
Even though I usually don't like fighting, I think there are a few whales that really could use a bit of your persuasion. I usually can only keep sane by not even looking at what they are up to...
Very funny!
@mariannewest,
Agreed.
But Satire is an Art Form defined by its demands. By its very nature, it is not funny if it doesn't bite. Had Mark Twain been unwilling to demean the absurd, the whole point of satire, we never would have heard of him. A satirist counts on his/her audience's willingness to 'suspend reality' and let him/her 'violate literal norms' for the sake of achieving a 'metaphorical effect.'
Much of Art ... is a conspiracy of the willing.
Thanks for conspiring. :-)
Quill
Always love to conspire 😀 (and love Mark Twain)
@mariannewest,
Me too. Twain is one of my all-time favorite writers. I have studied at length how he employed humor. It's very hard to make a thing look that easy. Especially satire. There is an extremely fine line between "satire which is humorous" ... and simply "being mean."
I consider Twain the ultimate Master of the Craft.
Quill
Wow, very well done Quivering Quill!
Enjoyed comments -
@fionasfavourites how we feel down here in our region, handful of fat, bloated, greedy people...
Gif shared by @traciyork sums up how we feel!
Every comment related in some way or another to distaste.
Definitely not what Satoshi envisaged, the future is made up by many, small eventually rise out of frustration or anger.
@joanstewart,
Hey Joan.
Honestly, I've got some of the best commenters on the blockchain. It's an embarrassment of riches. When one takes the time to create a thing of quality, it is heartening to see others do the same in response.
Quill
Awesome job @quillfire. I giggled all the way through. As always, you're dead on. Maybe you should become a witness and fix this sh*t .
@tryskele,
To change anything on the blochchain requires 17/20 Top 20 Witness Votes. Reform will require persuasion, not compulsion. And persuasion ... requires a pen, not a perch.
Quill
Which is why you're the perfect choice to be the pen for those of us that are not so eloquent. You teach the lesson without someone seeing it's a lesson.
Persuasion is usually the best route to take with enough time you usually can reach someone to understand a point of view. Which is why I mentioned you becoming a witness. Level the playing field so to speak. However, I do feel your voice is big enough to get those people to start thinking.
@tryskele,
Let me tell you what will level the playing field ... a great bloody mob. Yes, mobs tend to coalesce around an "eloquent speaker" (a "rabble rouser" ... think about what that term literally means). But it is the existence of a mob, per se, that makes those ignoring the "eloquent speech," finally listen.
To wit, the Storming of the Bastille:
.
.
If the dummies insist upon anarchy, give them anarchy.
Quill
Always thought chess was a non violent game hahaha
Love how you presented the shenigans :)
@kaerpediem,
You should see me play checkers. Now THAT ... is a blood-sport. :-)
Quill