Shadows in Confinement

in #popcontest7 years ago (edited)

A lot of people tell me that all these positive talks, motivational talks and reads are good to listen, but not practical in real life. Well so today I want to share some of my real life experiences where I have witnessed how these small motivations makes a difference in one’s life.

This was some years back, when I came across a book, “Shadows in Cages”, I have also dedicated my today’s title to it. This book is all about life of women in Indian Prisons, how they are kept, treated and what happens to their children. It was very heart breaking to read. It described how the children were separated from their mothers once they reached the age of 5 and then were sent to Rehabilitation Centers never to be seen again. Even till the age of 5 when they are allowed to be with their mothers in the Prison, their life is full of misery, the only comfort is that they are with their mothers.

I felt a lot of pain while reading this book and for a long time, it went on in my head. So I decided that I want to do something in this area. It was not my first time that I was trying to get into any type of service work, I was already into it, mostly working with the education of slum children. Children have always been close to my heart and most of my work revolves around them. But this was something very different, first of all it’s not possible to get into Prisons since you need to be authorized in a certain way to do it.

My next action was I connected with the author of this book Ruzbeh Bharucha and I let him know about how I felt and asked for his guidance as to how can I go ahead and make some difference to them. He was very kind to respond and mentioned that it would be a hell for me going to prisons since I did not have those kind of connections and it was not very easy to do it unless I had some organization of my own or very high level contacts. Then he suggested, if I am very keen then there is one possibility, and that was the Remand homes/Rehabilitation Centres where the children after 5 years are shifted, I could work with them along with the support of some NGO.

This was the ray of light for me, I set my intention and then started doing my research work about these homes. It is said that when you desire for something very strongly the whole of the universe comes to your help, and exactly that’s what happened. In a few day’s time I received a call from one of my friend who had his own NGO that they are planning to start working with one of the Remand homes and that if I wish to join them, provided I am willing to sacrifice my most important day and time of the week – Sunday afternoon. I definitely had no second thoughts and jumped up with the offer. I could not believe that this came walking to me from front. It was a miracle for me.

So after all the planning, the following Sunday was my first visit to the Boys Remand Home, I still cannot forget the sight as the first sight of it brought me to tears. The place was one big room, where more than 100+ children stayed. They all had an overall space of 1 thin mattress and their belongings were 3 to 4 pairs of clothes, 1 footwear and some very basic utilities like comb, soap, etc. that’s it. At the end of the room was a corridor, where there were a couple of toilets. There was a kind of a stench in this place which for the first timer is very uncomfortable. I was somewhat used to it, while working in the slums. One thing I noticed was all the children were in a very happy state of mind, they were very eager to spend time with us.

The thoughts that were running all through out in my mind were, in the outside world we have the least idea of what life can be for some. We have so much of luxury to our comfort and we still feel unsatisfied and desire for more.

Our group’s mission was to spend the afternoon with the children giving our best to them. So as per our forte we were to build up our own plan, for me storytelling and some brain exercise is best I can go with or some art work, so I decided to split my time up with each of these. In our group we had some musicians too who played guitar for them and lot of other activities. As we progressed we observed that each of the child had some or the other talent, some were very good at drawing, some at music, dance, games and they were all so eager to display their talent.

Nothing bothered them, the stench, the life, the stay, the food they did not have any complaints for anything around, rather they were all in high spirits doing what they enjoyed the most.

So week on week I started building a very good bond with them, Every Sunday they used to eagerly wait and as soon as they used to see us coming they would run and hug us tight, these hugs were some most beautiful moments of my life, so much unconditional love and joy in real sense that no luxury can bring. I also started taking my son along who was then 13, I wanted him to see the hard realities of life and know that life is not so simple and easy for everyone.

The little boy in white next to me is my son, I am glad I got the opportunity to teach him something so valuable

During my sessions with them, I did a lot of motivational talking with them, to my surprise these kids whose life at that point of time felt so meaningless, each one had a big dream. They wanted to become big in life and they used to tell me, sister wait and watch I will become this and that. It was the true spirit of life. Even in those circumstances there was nothing that they felt sorry about, seemed like each one had a vision to move ahead.

This was something so amazing. People who have everything even with little failures in life end up sucking and believing that the whole life is their enemy and give up on all hopes. One heart break, one failure and people want to commit suicide. Whereas here when one has nothing, there is still so much zeal and hope that one day the world will be at their feet.

I continued with this mission for a couple of years and then we had to stop it for some reasons, but whatever time I spent with them was a complete satisfaction for me and the best part of my life.

Look at them, they all look so full of Life

Coming to me, as a child I too had a very difficult childhood, and was raised in an orphanage and also in my adulthood there were lot of failures that I faced. I will not say I was a very strong person then, constant failures and the downside of life always made me think a lot as to why life is so tough for some and so gentle for some. But yes, I was very determined that no matter what my time is right now, I will make it a beautiful life for me one day. Of course there was a lot of testing and beating on the way, but today I am very happy and satisfied with what I have made of my life. The only thing is that I never gave up, I would have temporary set backs and then bounce back again. Reading had always been my passion and I read a lot of motivational life changing books. At times I used to doubt but then there was always a hope that if things can work out for so many people then why not me. I am glad for all the experiences of my life, cause if I would had not had them, may be I would not be the person I am today.

As a child I used to get lot of sympathy and sorry feeling from lot of people, and I used to hate it. That was the time when I decided that when I grow up, I will never feel sorry for anyone nor show sympathy rather I will do whatever best in my capacity for anyone and help them in whatever way I can to make their dreams come true.

When I had spend time with the children at the remand home, I saw my reflection in them and yes I believe that all of them will make it beautiful for them someday

You may be going through the worst of the situations in life, don’t feel sorry for yourself, don’t try to gain sympathy from people, that will only take you behind in life and not any further. Be it whatever situation, face it as a challenge. In all my years of counselling I have not come across a single person who have not had difficult times in life. Everyone will have some or the other challenge, some in childhood, some when they grow up. What is the approach is all that matters, you can sulk and brood and get miserable, or you can put your brains to work and find out solutions. It is entirely your choice. Its ok to slump back at times, but learn to bounce back and not stay in it for long. Always keep the flame of HOPE on.

I have always believed in Walk the Talk, so whatever I write is always from my experiences and learning and I believe that Only hard work and positive attitude takes you to success, there are no shortcuts in life, be it experiences or learning. And when you reach the top, be humble and never look down onto anyone.

Thank You

If you enjoyed reading this blog, You may also visit my other blogs.

https://steemit.com/goals/@nainaztengra/people-with-goals-succeed-is-it-true
https://steemit.com/spirituality/@nainaztengra/significance-and-effects-of-a-new-moon
https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@nainaztengra/my-introduction-my-story-all-about-me
https://steemit.com/spirituality/@nainaztengra/meditation-a-way-of-life-part-2


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This was a fabulous post my friend and im glad I had the time to read it before going home soon here from my nightshift job at 630 am LOL! I totally agree with all the positive stuff you mentioned in the end of your story , stuff I talk about quite often as well ! We must stay strong , positive and never give up hope ! Its always great to have dreams as well , it gives us something to strive for and keep going ! Thanks so much for entering this awesome post in my #popcontest , I loved it @nainaztengra ! Good luck !! Upped and resteemed !!👍👍👍👍💕💕💕💕

Thank you very much @karenmckersie for appreciating my post. This one is just not a post for me, there is a lot of emotional attachment to this piece of work and I am so glad the way it is accepted by my dear steemit family.

Its a great story and you should be very proud of all that you've done !👍👍👍

Hi, thank you for your request to join MAP; here is your invitation to the Minnows Accelerator Project (MAP) chatroom.

You will initially be welcomed as a New MAPster! Please post your recent articles and when one makes it into a "Six of the Best" contest you will then have full access to further interact, collaborate and promote your work. See you there!

Many thanks for allowing me to join the MAP.

You are doing great work helping these children . I am happy that I can join forces with you to spread positivity here. Cheers

Thank you for making yourself a part of this positivity chain. God bless

This place will become a more positive place.

@nainaztengra - You are a person who has battled life to come to the position you are right now and are also helping others in difficult situations. I admire your courage and passion.

I believe that Only hard work and positive attitude takes you to success, there are no shortcuts in life, be it experiences or learning. And when you reach the top, be humble and never look down onto anyone.

I can totally relate to this. Kudos. Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience. Upvoted

Regards,

@vm2904

Thank you very much @vm2904 for your admiration. Yes we only learn our lessons in life when we actually go through it.

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Your boy gonna be a heartbreaker 😎

He's the apple of my eye 😁

Such a powerful and inspiring post, Kudos for you for giving you time to these children that so clearly needed it, and even more so for bringing you Son in so he also learnt from this remarkable experience

More than me giving my time to them I feel I was lucky enough to get this opportunity of they giving their time to me with so much of acceptance. Some wonderful memories of my life, which I miss it so much these days after shifting to muscat.

Yes I can relate to what your saying during my travels I spent a good bit of time helping out NGOs in various countries and when working with those in need isn’t it amazing how you come away from it feeling so much better and revitalized by the good they give you

Wow this is a very real and inspirational post. Nothing but truth, action, and life changing action to inspire you to get up and make a difference in the world.

@gniksivart grateful for liking my work and showing such high regards for it

wonderful post. Some of this was so heartbreaking to read, although I am aware of it. But just your essence and the time you spent with the kid. It is often amazing how children who have nothing or almost can be so resilient and positive. Thank you so much for sharing your soul.

Glad you reciprocate my feelings and emotions. There is always so much good to look at in life

This is absolutely wonderful @nainaztengra! I love how wonderful and determined you are. You inspired me to be so much better and do so much more than I can. Spending time with the not-so-privileged ones is such an eye and mind opener. It makes us realize how grateful and happy they are living with so less and makes us become appreciative of our blessings. Thank you for this post!

Thank you very much dear @sharoonyasir for your kind words. I am glad that life is giving me such wonderful opportunities to do something meaningful.

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