Fleeting moments and the lessons my twins teach me
“Mummy, I know we should accept who we are, but I want to fly.”
My 7 y.o twin daughter made this statement a month or so ago. We were in the car and it was her turn to sit in the front. The radio was playing, my mind was on the clock, and I was in a mad rush to get them to school so I could start my work day. The other twin was yelling in the back—she only has one volume these days—and was adding to my frustration and growing impatience.
When my daughter spoke these words, I immediately turned off the radio and asked her to tell me more. This twin looked at me earnestly, and then went on to tell me a story about unicorns, rainbows and flying. I wasn’t quite connecting the dots, but didn’t want to interrupt her. Finally, she came to a grave realization:
“Mummy, unicorns and rainbows are not so interesting. Flying is better I think.”
I agreed that being able to soar through the clouds was much more fun.
I then had a moment of anxiety.
Maybe this is flawed parenting, but I dread telling them that their dreams, as they tell me, won’t happen. I love their innocence and their belief the world is filled with magical possibilities. I’m just not the kind of mother who can come up with practical reasoning for my children on the spot, that’s my husband’s expertise. But I have a stab. I tell my girls:
“Even if you can’t fly, don’t forget, when you grow up, you can still fly a plane. Wouldn’t that be cool—being a pilot?!”
The noisier twin in the back stuck her nose up at that and cried:
“That’s work!”
The quieter twin in the front said she’d prefer to fly herself...
-sigh-
The point is that my daughter snapped me out of my mood with her words. Both girls in their different ways teach me patience and remind me of what’s important. They teach me that these moments with them as they navigate and makes sense of their world is not only precious, but fleeting. I speak to some parents at work, usually older who now have grown up children. What I hear is how they were so often looking to the next milestone in their children’s lives, they missed the here and now. More so than anything in life, we need to embrace the moments with our children. That’s what my children teach me and my husband.
It seemed like only yesterday they were two little bundles in my arms.
Time flies.
My family playing in a small patch of Red Woods on a recent weekend trip
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I saw your name pop up in the comedyopenmic Discord room, so wanted to stop by. As a parent myself, I can relate to having a million thoughts and plans running through my mind and sometimes forgetting to appreciate the innocence of the here and now our kids experience. My lil ones are still small so they won’t ask me about flying anytime soon, but I’m not sure myself what answer I would give. Thankfully, right now my toddler tells me he wants to go twick tweat, and mommy can say “We’ll put on our costumes and go trick or treating in Oct, k? How about we go to the pool now?” He happily nods his head and we’re set. 🙂
Glad to see your recent posts are receiving support. Great job!
Thank you for the visit and I’m pleased you came through the COM server. It’s another reminder of the importance of community. Yes, the support has been warmly appreciated curie. I just checked your profile and it would seem you’re one of 3! Bonus! Hehe
I’m also touched you thought to comment on this post too. I was sentimental on this one and always appreciate bumping into a parent who understands. :)
I don't know if it will bring you a lot of traffic, since I'm not "that" big of a steemian yet, but I featured your post on my Friday Favorites! Good luck and this is a great post!
https://steemit.com/steemit/@byn/friday-favorites-the-posts-that-caught-my-eye-this-week
Thank you so much, you didn't have to do this, but I appreciate that you did. I am a little more precious of this one because it's about my babies. lol. I don't post about my children in much detail - we're a very private family as far as social media. This is a new experience for me. Again, it was just nice to know someone didn't think it was a silly post. I saw it as a moment I needed to capture to remind me when I often forget. Your words and support has been nothing by generously helpful! xx
Saw your post on isle of write. Funny, you had to share it around to get upvotes but that is how it works. With time, it will get better and better.
I am not a parenting or married even, so I cannot claim to be an expert in parenting but I have never let go of my imagination. I still dream of elves, fairies and other fantastic things, people and places. I still see wonder in the world. I feel that a child should be allowed to let his or her imagination roam. Time will give them s clearer picture of the world but it would be good if they still dream of fantastic things when that time comes.
Thank you for dropping by and commenting. It is quite an adjustment to me having to push links about, but you are right, it is the game. Hopefully, it will get better and I can connect with readers and like-minded writers. :)
And yes, we need to hold on the magic and mysteries of life. I grew up believing fairies, brownies and the like. My favorite story was Enid Blyton's Faraway Tree. So I hope you continue sharing the beauty of your imagination to the world. That's why we write, to bring to life the fantastical creations in our mind. Hope to see you again!
Thank you for sharing @linnyplant... I too started very private especially when it comes to my kids but it is they who have convinced me that it's ok .... it's a long story and I will share that story one of these days.....
On a separate note, your lil one wanting to fly reminds me of when my daughter was 3. Both her parents had big dreams for her. I wanted her to be the first female Prime Minister and her Dad wanted her to be a F1 driver. Yes "big" is an understatement.... haha
So there I was giving her a shower and she's telling me what she's going to be when she grows up.
"Mummy, when I grow up, first I will be a race car driver, then I will be the Prime Minister, then I will be a cheetah"
I didn't have the heart to tell her that the last was next to impossible. She was only 3, I thought I'd let her hang on to her big dream for a little longer....
Thanks for the lovely comment and sharing back a bit of your own experience. Very much enjoyed reading them. I have dreams for my daughters of course, but I continually need to remind myself give them space to be who they want to be. All I can do is seed the ideas and it is up to them to make their own decisions. :)
I have only just taken a step back to allow them to be .... she is 16 this year but I guess better late than never....her brothers have it a little easier because I have learnt through my mistakes and still learning everyday.....By the way I always wanted twins, they must be so adorable :)
Do you let single men join your Steemmammas Discord?
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