When we were young, we wanted to be anybody except ourselves

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about my life.

I also asked myself two questions.

One, What did I gain since I was born?

The first time I asked myself, my answer was nothing, only a dilapidated self.

Yes, dilapidated, the word has a certain derogatory, but I really can’t think of a better word to describe.

I am not always confident, I have said to many people "you have to be confident," but I never said to myself. Most of the times, I can easily comfort others, but always can't deceive myself.

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I am constantly confused, lazy, often dream to be successful, but most of the times, I am stuck in the stagnant water.

When you feel that you are lost, you will only become more lost.

This is what I feel.

When we are lost, each of us will experience the bottleneck or the lowest point of our life, this period can be very long and can also be very short, and when it happens in our lives, we all want to escape the shackles, but we are often bound to it.

I do not want to face the real me, my inner inferiority, weakness, fear.

In reality, I am trying to perform the success and self-confidence, it is a "broken in body but firm in spirit" moments.

This is the first time I have asked myself and the answer to my first question.

A few days later, I asked myself the same question again, and the answer was different.

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Since I was born, I grew up, not only the body but also the mind.

Since I was born, there is always someone comes and goes, I learned and grown some answers from them.

Since I was born, although I have some lost moments, every time I will try to get through, every struggle has my mark of growth.

The same question, I changed from nothing to I seem to have learned a lot.

All these are because of my mood.

When I'm in a bad mood, I see the world in grey.

When I’m in a better mood, I look at the world as a colorful world.

We are accustomed to whitewashing our inner unbearable because we have not yet been able to accept and face our inner reality.

The road of life, long and full of roadblocks.

Thinking in a certain stage of life is to hope that our next step has fewer detours, rather than to increase our worries.

You don't have to define the answer to the future through nothingness, you have to walk to know the answer in life.

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Second, am I satisfied with my current life?

I am not satisfied with my current life at all times.

There is a word "live in the moment," every time I ask myself to live in the moment, most of the time I am not satisfied with the current stage.

There is also another word "self-motivated," but not everyone has. I have it, but I often lost it.

I used to like to give myself some motivation, and also often immersed in my own fantasies.

I always imagined that after a few years, I would live the life I wanted.

Later, I discovered that when people reach different ages, they will redefine a standard to current life.

And me, every time I am not satisfied with my current life, this is my inner greed in mischief.

The most feared is that there is no desire, when there is no desire, that person probably has no confidence in life.

Desire is like a balance, when it is not balanced, fear will cause extremes of the situation, then, it is not worth the candle.

Keep a humble heart toward life, you will be happier, satisfaction will not be too bad.

The beauty of my life is that most of the time I am trying to grow to be a better self.

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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://walkinharmony.vornix.blog/2018/08/16/when-we-were-young-we-wanted-to-be-anybody-except-ourselves/

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