Revenge on an evil landlord and how my blog became a victim of Hurricane Harvey.

Shit has been fairly eventful down here in cow town since Hurricane Harvey took a piss on Texas. I was horrified when I logged on and saw it’s been like 20 days since my last post. So after the flood water went down I went back to my house to find it pretty much intact. Since it was a shitty trailer jacked up on cinder blocks the water didn’t destroy all my shit but the electricity and air conditioning was gone, and the entire underside of the home was soaked in toxic avenger sludge, so despite my couch not being destroyed the house was unlivable. My slumlord cunt of a landlord disagreed and made my brother and I give our 30 day notice and pay September rent even though the only time we stepped foot in the house since the flood was to move out. Then she took $200 out of our deposit because we didn’t steam clean the carpet, $100 because we didn’t clean the ceiling fans, and another $290 more for miscellaneous bullshit. After I asked her if she was aware that she wasn’t a good person, she and her husband laughed at me.

The joke is on her because all of that is about as legal as serving alcohol to minors at a cockfight. I am currently shopping for lawyers to inform her of this. I am also contacting the IRS to inform them of her multiple rental properties that she insists the tenants pay for in cash so she doesn’t have to report the income. After some internet sleuthing I found out she is claiming a homestead exemption on her property taxes for one of her rental properties as well as the house she actually lives in. The local authorities have already been notified and said they would be happy to look into all her properties.

Revenge feels like a warm bath after coming in from the snow but I really would have preferred the old wrinkled bag of shit just act like a decent human being in the first place and save everyone a whole lot of trouble.

Anyway, I got Shanghaied into a job with my contractor neighbor Ben after pitching in to help him and his family start rebuilding after all their homes got fucked. Me and all the other volunteers turned into employees and somehow I wound up as a foreman. Now we have five homes we are working on and enough jobs lined up to last the next year. All the guys under me are between 19-21 years old, which is nice because that’s where I am on a maturity level so we all have a lot of fun swinging sledgehammers and making disparaging jokes about each other’s sexuality. The other day we had to pick up 400 sheets of drywall so we rented a U-Haul. Instead of taking two vehicles Ben just threw all the kids in the back of the truck. This is a bad idea, and there is a big sticker on the back of the truck saying as much but I don’t know if it is actually illegal. The guys thought it was fun until they had to spend all day being carted around Houston in an unventilated metal box going down the highway at 70 mph, surrounded by drywall and insulation. I took a turn in the sweat box and now have a newfound respect for illegal immigrants. That shit sucks. Ben offered five dollars to whoever could stand up the longest while he drove like a madman. He hit the brakes and our best guy Nate face planted into the back of the cab. He dislocated his finger and I’m pretty sure he had a concussion. The guy who won the bet refused to concede the five dollars to Nate.

So that’s what I’ve been doing. I’ve lost count of how many hours I work a week and when I get home I try to have a few drinks, just on principal, but I’m too exhausted to even work up a buzz. Every day I sit down at the computer hoping I can muster enough energy to do absolutely anything and I just can't. Off days are fairy tales at this point but I’m helping people rebuild and making some pretty damn good money in the process. Also, my beer gut is shrinking and my chest muscles are getting swollen like a staph infection. My body is starting to get used to the hell I’m putting it through so hopefully I’ll be able to start devoting more time to writing and reading blogs. I’m taking this weekend off to go gambling in Louisiana and get some R&R. Hopefully, I’ll get a story out of that, but if nothing else, I’ll recharge my batteries to get back to steeming.

Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4